**Wait Until Dark Victory ** - Audrey Hepburn and Bette Davis are fighting heroin smugglers and brain tumors. And they’re blind!
**The Name of the Slipper and the Rose ** - Retelling of Cinderella with Richard Chamberlin as Prince Charming and Sean Connery as a 14th century monk detective.
**Muppets from Space Jam ** - Gonzo, Kermit and friends look for Gonzo’s planet and find Michael Jordon stuck in an alternate Bugs Bunny reality.
**The Farscape Horizons ** - Lewis and Clark expedition stumble through a wormhole and gets canceled by the stupid Sci-Fi channel.
BonanZardoz - Ben Cartwright and his boys defend the homestead while worshiping the great stone head, Zardoz, and reading the Wizard of Oz.
The French Rainbow Connection - Gritty police drama in which Kermit T. Frog and Fozzie Bear get wind of a big shipment of heroin and begin a tail of the suspects, and their French Connection. The French national decides to eliminate Kermit by sending a frog-leg restaurant magnate after him.
Our Chinatown During a routine day, a boy and girl on the verge of adulthood hire Jake Gittes to investigate an alleged affair by the water commissioner of Grovers Corners.
I think a number of the posters aren’t terribly humorous concepts, but the “artwork” of the posters is entertaining. In other words, in this SDMB thread, the movie descriptions are usually the best part, but the movie poster might be hard to make. In that movie poster link, the descriptions (if people were to make one) might be bland, but the image is great.
Armageddon IT
A revival soundtrack by Def Leppard spices up this SciFi spectacular. An evil alien clown played by Tim Curry taunts Bruce Willis and his oddball crew of oil riggers as a giant blood-filled balloon “the size of Texas” menaces the Earth. “C’mon Brucy, join us. Up here we all flooaat.”
Howard the Duck: The Punisher
As if nothing could be more painful than Howard already was. He’s back, and he’s mad. Howard channels Dolph and Arnie in this tale of revenge and sarcasm.
<HOWARD throws knife, pinning bad guy to wall>
BAD GUY: That’s going to cost you!
<BG pulls knife from shoulder>
<H shoots BG in head with Really Big Space Gun>
HOWARD: Put it on my bill.
Mi Evita Loca
Madonna and Antonio Banderas star in this musical tale of star-crossed gang member lovers. A la Catherine the Great, Madonna attempts to take over Antonio’s gang by sleeping with all his homies…and his bitches too. Experience the horror of Urban Opera Rapping that could only be made by Hollywood.
(Since I live in the town where the murders depicted in the movie took place I have to add…)
Paris Trout is Burning- Dennis Hopper is a sadistic and paranoid merchant who goes on a killing spree during his small 1950s southern town’s annual Drag-Fest. My Big Fish Greek Wedding- a young Greco-American girl wants to reunite with her father before her wedding, but his habitual lies about having slept with Sirens and survived a Cyclops in his youth make it difficult.
The Russians are Coming to Dinner! The Russians are Coming to Dinner! The daughter of upstanding Americans brings home a guest amidst cold war tensions.
Strangers Throw Momma from the Train I just realized these are actually the same movie.
The Talented Mr. Limpet Matt Damon turns into a gay fish to help point out Nazi U-boats to the Americans.
Big Weird Science - Tom Hanks and Anthony Michael Hall star in this comedy about 2 boys who have their wishes come true and learn something about themselves along the way. Original soundtrack by the love child of Danny Elfman and Laurie Anderson.
What? This thread can’t die yet! There’s been so many wonderful ideas! You know, there has been a not insignificant number of these that actually would make good movies.
Just to keep things going … Saving Obi-Wan Kenobi During the Clone Wars, a group of Jedi track down Obi-Wan Kenobi and send him home so that someday he can teach the young Luke Skywalker.
The Star Wars of the Rings (Episodes IV-VI) Old Jedi master Gandalf Kenobi leads Frodo Skywalker, Han Gamgee, Chewmli the Dwarf Wookie, and other rebels in a quest to destroy the One Death Ring. They must go up against such villains as Darth Saruman and the evil Emperor Sauron.
The Star Wars of the Rings (Episodes I-III) This prequel, the tale of the second age of the galaxy, falls short. Even as the young Gandalf Kenobi tries to guide Bilbo Skywalker into becoming a Jedi, Senator Sauron is working to corrupt him. Attempted comic hijinks by Jar Jar Isildur are just not funny.
The Left Behind Unicorn- All the unicorns in the world have vanished but one. She must join an aspiring young wizard & an old maid to keep the faith & stand against mad world dictator Christopher Lee who would prevent the Second Coming of the Unicorns…
guess what I just watched L
Oddly enough, it’s not THAT far a deviation from the actual story