not so long ago i looked the guy i love in the eye and told him as much, he said it back, but then hed been saying it longer then i had. anyway because of a bunch of stupid things we broke up, and let more stupid things get in the way and even the idea of us staying friends is a major doubt now. whats being in love taught me? that its damn hard when ye break up 
The hamsters stole my post.
I met my SO in person almost 7 months ago - we will celebrate our 7 month anniversary next week. We knew each other online for a good 7 years before that, and when we met…it was like coming home. He knew me from the start. I knew him. He knows me inside and out, I feel safe with him, just thinking about him makes my heart pound wildly. I think I knew from the beginning that I wanted to spend the rest of my life with him, but I wouldn’t allow myself to start thinking about it seriously until we said “I love you” to one another this past December. I once thought I was in love with someone…compared to this, I knew that wasn’t right. And I have been told that I haven’t been with him long enough to know if I want to be with him forever. I do. I can feel it in my heart, in my soul, and in my core. I look at him, and I can see the future - I can see the children we’re going to have together, I can see us growing old together, I can see all of it. I don’t need anyone to tell me that’s wrong. They don’t know what I feel inside. I will be with him forever as long as God allows it- that much is a given and I have never been so certain of anything in my life. I know people who got engaged after two months and who have been married for thirty years, I know people who were together ten years before getting married and got divorced after two years. Nothing in life is a given, but I don’t think I would feel this positive about something if I didn’t truly believe it in my heart.
My best friend gave me the most wonderful compliment after she met him for the first time a couple of months ago. She said “You can tell that there’s attraction and that the two of you are definitely interested in one another, but there’s something else that’s really obvious to me - beyond that attraction, you look like you just know each other without talking. That’s what’s going to last you. You fit together.”
She made me cry, and I don’t think I’ll ever forget her words.
Ava
I’m just ducky!
No, I think it’s just that more women spend more time analyzing these kinds of things than men do. And, consequently, expressing their thoughts.
I’m reminded of this joke someone forwarded to me, from both the woman’s and man’s perspective. The woman’s part is all kinds of “what’s wrong with him? Is he mad at me for something?” and two pages of stream-of-consciousness stuff. The man’s perspective is, “She was quiet all night. Still got laid, though,” or some other kind of locker-room talk.
Or maybe Kn*ckers is right about “manly men,” like in that commercial where the guy can’t say “I love you” to his girlfriend so he spells it out in ketchup and takes a picture. Is that how I’m supposed to act?
So Davebear, I saw that you offered to post, but I haven’t really seen a romantic example. Maybe you could enlighten us? 
I’d like to see what you have to say on romantic love.
Lizard: you said,“How much do you wanna bet not a single man will post in this thread.” That why I whipped out the Coolidge reference.
I know lots about unrequited love…:sigh:
I don’t want to go into details, but the pain I’m feeling from my lost love still hurts so much. He’s dead to me, but I can’t even talk about my pain. I keep thinking things will get better, but there is such a large part of my soul that is still unrepaired. I miss him everyday.
And as soon as I posted, the song that we made ours comes on the radio here at work.
Being in love is different to loving, but it’s possible to have both.
It’s the saddest thing, and the most joyous thing at the same time.
And it feels like a gift. It feels like more than yourself.
Because I am characteristically long-winded, I’ll only tell you the story of my first experience…I have one other (my current one) which is a bit more movie-ish (in content, not length!) than the first; if someone really wants to hear it I’ll tell it later.
My first experience with real romantic love was odd…we both worked at Pizza Hut; I was 16 and he was 18. We were never properly introduced, but he was hard not to notice–he’s a big, loud guy who’s constantly making jokes or laughing (loudly) at them–still, I wasn’t attracted to him immediately and that seemed mutual. We eventually started joking around with each other a little, and we somehow got into this habit of making sexual innuendos (odd, in that I was then a virgin) after we simultaneously noticed that the marinara-sauce squirter next to me was quite ejaculatory…and, abruptly, I developed a huge crush on him. I never expected anything to come of it; it felt to me like one of those hopeless crushes you get on a movie star. There were just stars in my eyes; I was tormented. I only mentioned it to one person, my best friend at the time, who had just started working at Pizza Hut with us. So, she says she’ll try to put a good word in, and she starts talking to him a bit, which turned into her deciding she liked him, and him looking like he felt the same. I had meanwhile given up totally on the prospect, due partially to this new development and partially to the fact that I’m used to not getting the guys I have crushes on. I was completely over it, not thinking about it anymore, back to normal at work and elsewhere. Then, just as it seems they are about to get official–boom, she starts acting crazy possessive and he cuts it off. Then, mysteriously, he starts showing up at my house (a known hangout for people our age) and chilling when my friends are there (some of whom were his friends too, just the timing was weird), and gradually starts chilling with me when no one’s around. And suddenly one day says he wants to be with me. By this point I had not thought about him that way in months, so I was ambivalent for a few days, but when we finally kissed it was like lightning and silk as one feeling. We were watching Alice in Wonderland, and I felt just like Alice–very confused, wondering how things could be so strange and so beautiful at once.
It lasted 11 months from that day. For about 4 months I could not believe how perfect it was–we laughed constantly, we stared into each others’ eyes, we were never mad at each other for more than two minutes. But alas, I was young, and had never been serious about anyone, so once I got used to it, I became a brat. I threw fits, I got jealous, I alternately ignored and provoked him on purpose. I have no idea why I did these things; I truly did love him and he proved to me time and again that he loved me back, but love can only put up with so much. I started sensing his boredom and frustration toward the end, but I kept acting the same; of course he broke up with me. I was a wreck for about a month, then I stopped seeing him everywhere and it wasn’t so bad. When we do see each other now, we give each other a big hug, and I feel this radiating warmth inside, and I know I still love him and always will. But still loving him…it doesn’t hurt. I’m happy when I think of all the times we had together, and all the stupid stuff we did. I’m glad I had the opportunity to love and be loved that way, and I’m glad I lost it, too, because I gained another one.
OK, here is a full story from a guy.
I said, “I love you” to perhaps three people before I met her. It was only with her that I truly understood what it meant and realized what I had felt before was nothing like this. I will forever remember when I first said it to her. We were spending a romantic night together after just watching Chocolat. The lights were dim so I could barely see her face. We had been cuddling and rolling around together on the floor when I rolled over on top of her and looked into her eyes. She stared up at me with a look that melted away all my fears and doubts. She was talking to me with her eyes in a way I have never seen before or since. It must have been several minutes we spent there just looking at each other when I said, “I love you too.” She had made a connection with me the likes of which I had never imagined possible and I replied with the only possible response. She smiled a smile that made me happier than I have ever been and held me close. A few tears fell down both our cheeks, and from that moment I knew I wanted to spend the rest of my life with her.
The following year was the happiest I have ever had, and the greatest consolation was that I knew it probably would be. Though I expected us to have a lifetime together I knew we would never have as much time available to spend together as we did then. I appreciated every moment we shared. I would have proposed after two months, and she would have accepted, but I knew we had several years ahead where we could not be in the same town and I did not want a three year engagement or to live apart from my wife.
Eventually she moved to law school and the combination of the distance, relationship issues, and another man drove us apart. I remember driving in the car with her to visit a friend when she broke down crying because she felt how she said, “You are losing me,” and neither of us seemed able to stop it. Listen to the song “I love you Porgy” by Nina Simone and you will know exactly what it was like. That is the one song I still cannot hear without crying, thankfully Nina doesn’t get a lot of air play.
Losing her was the hardest thing I have ever gone through. I am at the point now where I can consider the possibility of feeling that way again, but I have met no one who seems likely. I am now dating a woman who has 90% of everything I look for in a woman and is perhaps a better match for me than she was, but that undeniable spark just isn’t there.
I still have an ache that doesn’t leave me. It wasn’t like healing from a horrible wound, but rather like healing from an amputation. That part is gone and though the direct pain has ceased it is never going to be whole again. A day does not pass when I do not think of her.
So, yes I believe in True Love. Do I think there is one person out there for each of us? I pray to God that isn’t true.
I fell in love with a beautiful woman. There was so much passion between us. Just holding her hand was almost enough to make me blush. I remember lying on the sofa with her. We fit so perfect in each other’s arms. I loved the person I had become because of her. Looking into her eyes I saw love, I saw happiness, and I saw sorrow. We had (have) a special link between us. Many times we knew what the other was thinking or doing. I remembering looking up at the stars, thinking about her, and wondering if she too was looking at the stars. The next day I would receive an e-mail about the stars the night before. Or I would be typing an e-mail asking her a question, and before I would even finish the e-mail, I would receive an e-mail from her answering the question. It got to the point that our coincidences didn’t even surprise us anymore.
I had never experienced the feelings I had for her, nor will I ever again. I believe we are soul mates, we complete the other. One soul living in two bodies. I do believe there is only one person for each of us. Well I know there is only one person for me. The happiest times of my life were by her side, the saddest times are when I’m without her.
One night we were sitting at a bar. She looked so beautiful that night. I had never before seen her in a skirt, and I felt such pride when she said that she wore it for me, she said she wanted to look pretty for me. (not that she ever needed to do anything to look pretty) I told her I loved her and she told me the same. I proposed to her that night, even though I knew what the answer would be. How can two letters, forming one word, bring so much pain?
She was the best friend I’ve ever had, or ever will have. How I loved to dance with her, neither of us knowing how to dance, but somehow with each other we floated on clouds. But now the dance is over, the band has packed up and gone. The beer bottles and the dance floor are empty, like my arms. We both had taken different paths, and our time together was ephemeral, but my love for this woman will never cease to exist.
I dream of her almost every night. I hear her voice calling from far away, wakes me up in the middle of the night.