Yesterday morning, I got up, went to the bathroom, and tried to wash my hands… in the tub. I have lived here for 15 years, so I can’t blame some sort of programming that led me to the wrong place.
What things have you randomly done with no explanation at all?
Last night I was preparing to take my contact lenses out and put them in their case.
Instead I took my wedding rings off and put them in the contact lens case.
:dubious:
I think I have been more preoccupied than usual lately, because I’ve done several things like that. A common one is trying to put the wrong lid on things after making a sammich. Obviously wrong, like a tupperware lid on the mayo or whatnot.
Was waiting to watch one of my favorite TV shows, and while waiting started watching something else. Something stupid. I didn’t enjoy it, but I watched it all the way through, and missed the show I had been waiting for. Another hour killed in the Sali household!
Put ketchup in my iced tea. Why? That is what I wanna know…guess my brain was on pause.
A couple weeks ago, I was waiting to get off work, and a customer came up and started talking to me. This customer was VERY chatty. Normally, this is fine, as it’s part of my job, and it’s not a retail-type job where people are standing in line waiting for me to assist them. But I needed to leave, as I had a bus to catch, and a coworker wanted to meet me in the break room so he could give me something, so internally I was a bit fidgety.
Then another coworker came up to me and said “hi, I’m here to cover this area for you,” making it VERY clear that he was here to replace me so that I could go home. In a state of total obliviousness, I said thanks, handed the keys off to him…and turned right back to the customer. Who kept talking. Forever. :smack::smack::smack:
Eventually, the customer went on his merry way, but I’d lost a considerable amount of time. When I went to the break room, the coworker I’d wanted to meet had already left. I also missed my bus.
I don’t blame the customer for this, obviously. How’s he supposed to know when I get off work? And anyway, it’s not really his problem. But I just don’t understand how the hell I missed such an obvious hint from my coworker. Normally I’m able to pick up on these things. I think I was just in stupid mode that day.
A few years ago I was doing dishes in my kitchen. Rinsed the last plate, rinsed the sink out, and then stood there flicking the light switch on and off for 5 minutes. My mom and sister both asked what I was doing with the water running and flicking the lights on and off. I looked at them, puzzled, and said I was trying to cut the water off. It wasn’t until they burst out laughing that I realized what I was doing.
Today I fixed myself a tall, cool glass of motor oil on ice. Which was a real doozy, since the motor oil and the ice are on opposite ends of the house.
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Back in college I was living in the dorms and people would pull the fire alarm in the middle of the night. This happened quite often, so when it happened for the millionth time in two years it shouldn’t have been a mystery to me.
But it was. I was asleep and when the alarm sounded (extremely loud, blaring, crazy loud alarm) I went through the following sequence of actions.
Here is another story, from back in high school. It was a Saturday night and I was asleep. I woke up and saw the clock, it was 5-something AM.
I start freaking out thinking that I’m late for school. In hindsight it makes no sense. It was a Saturday, and school gets out at 3, so even if it were 5 PM there was nothing I could do.
I brush my teeth, shower, throw on some clothes, get my books together. Then I run upstairs and wake up my sister. Shaking here, “Wake up! Wake up!”
She wakes up confused. “Hurry up and get dressed, we need to get to school!”
She gives me the coldest look I’ve ever seen and says in a perfectly flat voice “It’s… Saturday”
Then I snap back to reality.
Yes, I am very stupid when I wake up early.
Also, one time I brushed my teeth with liquid soap instead of toothpaste. The whole time I was thinking “This doesn’t taste right”. I didn’t realize until about an hour later what I’d done.
I’m not sure if this counts, since I have done this many times, but I will often pull into a drive-thru and try to turn down the radio. Repeatedly. And start to get mildly frustrated when nothing changes. Which is usually about the time I realize that the radio wasn’t on to begin with.
We have a building downtown that has a Christmas tree on top. They alternate red lights one year and green ones the next. One snowy Winter evening I got quite a barrage of honking from the people behind me as I sat at the stop light waiting for the tree to turn green.
Mom told me about a friend of hers she was having coffee with and the woman got up to sweep the kitchen floor as she continued to talk. After she had swept the dirt into a dust pan, without missing a beat in the conversation, she opened the clothes dryer door and threw the dust in on her clean clothes.
And the one I’ll never live down: For three months while my husband was doing an internship in CO we rented a very small studio apartment. He forgot to tell me he had invited his supervisor and spouse for the evening meal so it was a mad dash to run out for the essentials, race home and put them away, tidy up and be composed when they arrived.
At the table I asked if anyone would prefer milk with their meal and one person wanted a glass so I opened the refrigerator and there, for all to see, were four rolls of toilet paper.
There were so many jokes made about keeping the toilet paper cool that I totally forgot about pouring the milk. The next morning I found it in the bathroom cupboard.
It’s all about being in the world of ideas all the time and not about things. Yeah. That’s it.
I sometimes wake up and look at the time and freak out thinking I’m late for high school. I’m almost three years out of high school.
I’m just a few days short of 65. Yeah, I’ve done shit like that, but I’d rather not talk about it.
Nothing recent is coming to mind, but when I was in eleventh grade, I once set my alarm clock an hour early and somehow never noticed the placement of the hour hand, only the minute had. So I got to school an hour early.
And I was taking a zero hour class, so I got there at six am. And I am not a morning person. It was bizarre.
I keep absent-mindly confusing my shampoo and conditioner, and only realize I must have grabbed the shampoo twice when the “conditioner” suds up. And when I say “keep” I mean at least once every two weeks for months. sigh.
I brought my mom to Home Depot a couple of weeks ago, and we were checking out vanities. One of them began to ring, so naturally I opened the drawer to find the phone…and got an odd look from Mom as she fished her phone out of her purse. I still have no idea why I: a. thought the ringing was coming from one of the vanities b. thought that I needed to answer it.
I’ve done the “go to work when it’s not a weekday” thing. Except I realized it when I got into the garage and wondered where all the cars were…
I’ve dumped a scoop of cereal into the dog’s bowl on many occasions. He is always very appreciative.
There was the time when I forgot that I have stairs in my apartment. I paid for that little brain fart with two broken feet.
Ever walk up to your front door pressing the unlock button on your car fob?