Or for that matter, would you mind not using the “okay” sign in front of your Brazilian acquaintance, or not doing a thumbs up to your Arabian pal, or extending your palm outward towards your Greek friend (or any other secular taboo that people may get a little miffed over due to upbringing). I don’t think it’s absurd to comply with allowing someone to feel more comfortable around you, wherever the hangup stems from. Then again, I’m mellow to the point that I could probably have Thanksgiving Dinner in good faith with Stalin and Hitler so…
Um… the Dalai Lama doesn’t believe in christ or god.
Here’s a quote from Tenzin Gyatso, 14th Dalai Lama, 1988:
“We must conduct research and then accept the results. If they don’t stand up to experimentation, Buddha’s own words must be rejected.”
I am talking entirely about those who believe in the popular Christian, Islamic, Jewish creator.
As far as what the majority of believers think, I think it’s pretty obvious if they’re actually offended by taking a lord’s name in vain. We’ve discussed on these boards multiple times that most believers are unfamiliar with their bible, and usually concoct their own version of god-- who he is, what his role is, what he thinks (ugh), and what’s expected.
Though all my years, I have NEVER found anyone with the same definition of god. In a recent atheistic conversation I had, someone said, “Look, god created all of us, so let’s just leave it at that.” To my surprise, this spouted more debate among the believers I was talking with. Someone countered with, “Well, then, why did my mom have to be pregnant, then? Couldn’t god have just made me without a womb?”-- this was a believer. More ensued, I just sat and smiled. 
I normally don’t pay attention to people who blaspheme around me, but reading this thread it seems as though piping up might be a really quick and effective way to work out who is and isn’t a giant asshole.
I’ve been asked this and I try my best to comply. Sometimes it just goddamn comes out and, oops, sorry about that, but I really do make an effort. It’s just a part of my speech pattern in a relaxed informal situation at this point and even if I try to not say it I’ll slip up occasionally.
Why not try though? It doesn’t really cost me anything. And since I’m not religious it’s essentially a meaningless swear that I only say out of habit so if it makes them more comfortable it seems like the most polite course of action to respect their wishes.
Yeah, I should concede to that. I stayed with my parents over the holidays in my Dad’s den. He has a crucifix and a rosary above his desk. I made no qualms about it.
Even in a stranger’s house, I would do the same. Sometimes–not all the time-- I really feel that America can’t be civilized unless we make people keep their religion at home.
I should add that it is to say it doesn’t necessarily make you a dick to disagree with the taboo they have, or to tell them why you disagree, but I do think it’s a bit rude for you to continue doing it after you voice your disagreement if they don’t “come around.”
So, “Would you please not say that around me?” is rude?
I grew up in a church and as a result overcompensated by swearing more than anyone around me. That said, i would certainly try to not offend someone that politely requested I don’t swear or at least not goddamn.
That’s another aspect of this. Don’t we say things like, “Jesus fucking christ!” just to get a reaction? I mean, saying that around church-goers makes people offended, gasp and pay attention. Don’t we just do this to draw attention to ourselves? Up the ego? “I’ll make 'em pay attention.”
I’m also gonna sidetrack here by mentioning I don’t even find the word ‘fuck’ offensive as an outburst in any way. What I DO find offensive is watching a “Scrubs” episode and hearing Dr. Elliot say “frick, frick, frick…” Oh, just say, FUCK, sister! We KNOW you want to! (Say the word, not do the act, I mean )
No to both. but I might call him an asshole (depending on how big he was).
Not that there’s any comparison. There’s nothing derogatory or insulting about saying the words “God” or “Jesus.” They aren’t profanities. You can’t compare them to racial epithets, because those have no other purpose. That the names of gods can be used “in vain” is a pure religious belief. Asking someone not to do it is not about being hurt by hostile or insulting language (it’s neither), it’s about one person trying to stop another from committing what he believes is a sin. My analogies to asking someone else to refrain from wearing pork or asking a non-Muslim woman to cover her face are much more accurate.
Yes.
I really do think it’s rude. Especially from an adult. “O, wuld yooo pease not say around me?(Baby voice)” Ugh. I’d say, we’re in public, rosary gripper.
The best reply is, “Then don’t be around me.”
They can all kiss my ass. They’re smart enough to when an insult is intended and when it isn’t.
ETA If I had a friend who told me that some innocuous gesture had an obscene meaning in his culture, it would probably just make start doing it constantly as a goof. If they were the type to really get huffy about, it’s probably not somebody I’d get along with well anyway.
You’re being needlessly hostile. From here on out I’m just going to ignore your posts.
Yes I would. At least I would try to. I even try to say *fuck *less often around the people who don’t like it.
And a whole host of others.
As long as you’re in earshot (or typeset in this case, I guess) you might find reason hard to ignore.
What was so hostile? The baby voice or the rosary gripper?
Again, we’re in public, on a forum with rules I respect, but let’s move this to Great Debates, please.
OTOH, being ignored by nobody is pretty good, eh? (Ba, dum, dum!) Kidding, kidding…
Not saying God damn isn’t all that big a deal for me. On a scale from 1 to 10 with a 1 being a super easy request and a 10 being a really tough request, I would consider it a 1 in most situations.
Now if they asked me to not eat bacon or some other religious no no in their presence, it would depend on the situation. Example: If they were good friends and I was at their house, in a country in which it was generally frowned upon, it would be no problem- a 1. I could eat as much bacon as I wanted when I got home, so what the hell, I’ll go a meal or two without bacon for the sake of my friendships.
However, if it was someone I barely knew and they were in my house here in the USA, it would be a bit more of a tough request- I would put it at a 9 or 10. I would be as polite and as diplomatic as I could (assuming this individual is a friend of a friend or something like that), but I would chomp that bacon without much hesitation and without getting too worked up about it.
Words are words to me. I don’t know how I’d respond to such a request – I wouldn’t agree to refrain (things like “god damnit” come out as a reflex sometimes, just like “ew” or “ouch” or “haha”), but I’d have a hard time being rude or confrontational about it.
I consider it slightly rude on the part of the requester to ask of me.
It’s no different, IMO, than having a Jewish co-worker sneer at my pork sandwich I’d brought in for lunch and ask me to refrain from eating in front of him. Or, as mentioned upthread, a Muslim man asking a female to cover her face in his presence.
If you’ve got religious beliefs, that’s fine, but keep them away from me.
Yes, fine, I agree, but we’re not talking about people who overreact and get all huffy over it, we’re talking about someone who can take it, but due to whatever reason would prefer you refrain. They know no offense is meant, they’re not going to get MAD at you for doing it, but it may make them a bit squirmy just because it’s been pounded into their brains for umpteen years, wouldn’t it be respectful to ease their squirmyness a bit?
To be perfectly honest, I’d probably do the exact same thing, if they got huffy I’d apologize and stop doing it around them though, but I would make a mental note that said person probably isn’t prime friendship material for me. Would you keep doing it around them even if they did get huffy until they left? Or would you cease and then just remember said person is no fun and then not actively pursue a friendship anymore?
I’ll be honest. Although I expected some people to say that they wouldn’t comply with the request, I didn’t expect anybody to get upset about such a request either.
It seems to me, the fact that the request is related to religion has something to do with some of the posters refusing the request, so let me ask, if somebody said instead “Would you please not swear in my presence?” Or, “Would you please not tell jokes about fill in the blank, it makes me feel uncomfortable.” Would you go along with the request then?