Which is it?
the latter has been mine, and it has served me well so far.
Treat others as you want them to treat you.
My default is to treat others as you want them to treat you unless or until they advise you differently.
This is my technique as well, and has always worked for me perfectly. I’ll treat someone as my best friend until they’re an asshole to me in response. At that point, I won’t give them the time of day.
This has been my stance. It’s worked out pretty well.
Treat others as you’d have them treat you, until they’ve given good reason to treat them like the jerkfaces they are.
Treat others with the same deferrance and respect you’d want others to offer to you. That includes bothering to take the time (when appropriate, reasonable, and possible to do so) to find out the other person’s preferences.
I do not attempt to feed my girlfriend hot tea when she is sick because she really hates tea…she will want chicken bouillon with egg noodles instead. She knows I like whole limes when my throat is sore, and gets them for me, although she would never squeeze a whole fresh lime down her own throat. The part that is still “do unto others as you would have them do unto you” is one that takes into account the taking into account of the other person’s sensibilities, wishes, and tastes.
It’s not always an option, and in its absence you have to do some guesswork and some projection, but the spirit remains the same.
Generally as I would like to be treated, but sometimes as they treat me (in both positive and negative cases).
Depends on who goes first.
If it’s me I treat people with respect and compassion.
If they go first and treat me like crap they get it back tenfold.
Strive to be the better person.
Because you can’t control them, but you can control yourself, so why not be sure that you’re always doing you best.
My goal is to treat people the way I would want to be treated (accounting for personal preferences being assumed in that). I fall short sometimes, but it’s what I try to do.
You’re missing a crucial third option: treat others the way you think they want to be treated.
I try and treat other people like I’d like to be treated. If it works, great. If not, hey, I tried! 