I’m astonished that you didn’t notice the number of posters who said that if they’re distracted, it’s their problem, not that of the owner of the nipples.
IMHO, this is where the Abrahamic religions got it very wrong: men (and other people) can control themselves. Civilized people do. To accuse all men of being weaklings who cannot help but give in to their urges, and to require all women to cover themselves to save these weakened men, is a grave insult to everyone concerned.
Not slutty or unkempt, but unprofessional. I wouldn’t choose to wear anything in the workplace which was likely to be distracting to my colleagues.
I should add that I am a very conservative dresser. I learned back in my “Barbie Doll” days that it pays to be a bit frumpy at the office, if you want people to listen to what you have to say. I would never consider wearing short skirts or heels over 1.5" to the office. It’s not a meet market.
That reading of this thread is just a wee bit exaggerated and hyperbolic to the point of being misrepresentational, no? Because, speaking for at least some American men, we’re not animals.
I wonder if some of what you’re reacting to is innate to the different social norms between Germany an the U.S. It reminded me of the German/English social divide that Mil Millington writes about when talking about his German girlfriend, Margret (very funny stuff, BTW)…
I can assure you that I am not ignorant of bras, nipples, or laundry. That was a joke.
I don’t think nipples are a vile and filthy symbol of womenhood and their disgusting sexuality; I just don’t like flashing mine about the office.
My thoughts exactly.
The niplet shape that’s visible through a reasonable fabric thickness does not have the same “do me” look as it does when showcased through a Saran wrap thickness of fabric and/or too-tight blouse.
Just like how, yes, you can tell a guy does have a penis because there’s a bulge in his pants. But, if the clothing layers are so sheer and tight that there’s a prominently displayed moose knuckle or helmet ridge, that’s different. Ditto if he pays no mind to his erections, lol!
I don’t think it’s got much to do with the size of the junk or “whose problem” looking is. If someone doesn’t have the common sense to even pick out their own clothes appropriately, I wouldn’t be quick to trust them with anything else.
My mistake 
Add me to the list of guys who love to see them, but don’t think it’s the best look for a lawyer or banker.
But what I REALLY love to see is nipples that become erect just for me. My ex-wife had a pretty Asian friend with unusually large breasts. And whenever we talked, almost without exception, I could see her nipples become erect. I count it as evidence that I’m not a total shit that I never made a move on her, even after I divorced my wife, as my wife didn’t have many friends.
I know that has little to do with the poll. I just love to think about it.
Straight female here…it used to bother me, until I finished “developing” and started having trouble finding proper bras. The lined ones available in my size are too thickly lined; the ones with “concealing petals” have the petals in the wrong location to work for me. And I don’t even want to think about putting anything adhesive near my nipples…I have nasty reactions to prolonged Band-Aid wear, and I can’t imagine having a similar reaction near such a sensitive area.
I’m careful with my clothing selections…when I do wear a lightweight sweater to work, I make sure to have some sort of jacket available for walking around the office or warehouse. I’ve also found that Lands End polo shirts provide some level of concealment; they appear to be made of two layers of material. I do what I can to keep them contained; if somebody sees something, their reaction is their problem.
Just mentioning that right now this thread is immediately underneath “Recommend a Photo Retouching Service”.
This, exactly. They’re not slutty - they’re not even erect - just prominent. And I prefer to keep that aspect of my anatomy to myself and perhaps a limited set of fabulously good looking men. I don’t otherwise want to wear padded bras, but in regular bras my nipples show even if I tape them.
Um, you do know that the author whooshed you there, right? At first I was unsure whether the German aquaintances were pulling the English author’s leg, but based on the second example, he is the one doing the leg-pulling.
For the record: putting photos of your naked girl-friend into a normal photo-album and showing them to a casual visitor from England is not normal German behaviour. Taking pictures of your naked girlfriend and showing them around in a raunchy, boys-will-be-boys atmosphere among the lower classes, or rednecks - that I can imagine. But in a normal setting, a photo album, a visitor from a known-prudish culture, and the girlfriend knowing about it and being comfortable? No, I call bullshit.
Much more telling however, is the second example. Dropping jeans and trying them on in plain view in a store instead of using the changing rooms? That would certainly invite stares and/or comments from the other shoppers. Even in East Germany (where during the communist rule, the prudish christian morality was tried to be erased) or a hip jeans store for young people (who do have less hang-ups about sexuality) it still would be out of the norm.
Now, it is true that there are different social norms between Germany and the Anglophone world. Germans do have FKK (free body culture) beaches and areas at public swimming pools (but they are seperate and shielded from view). We don’t force (as in expect them to, unless they want to be called sluts) women to wear BHs, they can wear them if they need or want, but it’s not expected. We don’t flip out over a wardrobe malfunction. We don’t rate a movie “adult” because of the sight of a naked breast (or the word Fuck). But that doesn’t mean we run around naked all day, either (foremost because the weather isn’t warm enough half of the year, anyway:))
I read the majority of the women in this thread saying that they want to cover not only their breasts with a BH, but also their nipples with some special BH, and maybe additional sweaters or other measures, just so their nipples can’t be seen. And I read how many men notice them, look at them, or have to control themselves to not look at them. (I also don’t understand the reference about women looking at men’s “junk”. How many women do that, and why would they want to? As the phrase goes “My face is up here!” Why would I want to look at people’s genitals or breasts when I’m talking with them?)
This is simply a non-topic over here; the fact that it’s such a big topic women spend a lot of time thinking about, or a lot of money trying to find the right solution to, is weird.
And doubly weird, into creepy, are the male posters who say that they look at the nipples and are turned on, and can’t concentrate on anything else. That’s not normal, either, over here, certainly not what I would expect of males older than 18 years.
It’s not about the “Abrahamic religions” - we are Christians over here, too, you know. It’s about the backwards, macho attitude that’s obsessed with womens bodies and men getting turned on by seeing them, instead of “That’s person X I’m talking to”.
And yet, my wife reported similar attitudes to the “second example” - changing clothes in public - when visiting Berlin about 15 years ago for an academic conference. She was hanging out in a public park at lunch time, on a nice summer day in July. She remembers being surprised by the visible presence of armed police with attack dogs on leashes and machine guns over their shoulders.
She also remembers being surprised to see a man dressed in a suit with jacket and tie - something already becoming a rarity in the US then, even for most “white collar” office workers - who strolled out to a clear, sunny spot in the grass, put down his briefcase, and then proceeded to strip. All the way down to his underwear, including removing his undershirt to the bare chest. To lie in the field to sunbathe for about 30 minutes before re-dressing and walking off.
The guards did nothing, though at some point they did ask someone for papers or something that the dog growled at. Nor did any other passer-by seem to find this a remarkable action at all.
:: goes back through thread trying to find definition of ‘BH’; can’t find it ::
It seems to me that English-speaking North America (can’t really speak for other cultures) does have a messed-up attitude towards sex and the human body; there’s a simultaneous lust towards and coverup towards it. It’s next-to-impossible here to just relax and treat sex and the human body as everyday things of no national importance. Hence, the freakout when someone accidentally let their boob show on national TV.
Well, some of us here are males of 18 years. But that’s not an excuse for the others. In an environment where we are trained to see the breasts as sexual, we then have to fight that training in order to not see them as sexual when interacting with someone.
Yet there seem to be a lot of folk who believe that covering things up will make people not think about them. And the conservative religious folk of the Abrahamic religions all seem to be about covering things up.
I’ve been to neo-pagan nudist events. After about ten minutes, you get used to the lack of clothing, and then it’s just normal-looking people around you.
It’s much easier to exist in that environment, actually; the lack of mystery is a positive thing. You realize that you’re just as blobby and misshapen and human as the others around you. Nudity is a perfect antidote for the fashion industry and its mind-games.
I think the phrase here is ‘comedic exaggeration’ rather than BS. If you read his website, he’s not really one to minimize things.
My bet is that he was being shown pictures by a friend of his wife, and that one of the pictures was taken at a topless beach (maybe not even showing anything). The guy had a moment of surprise, because English people of his age aren’t used to topless beaches, but overcame it easily because English people of his age do know that they exist and haven’t caused the end of the world yet even in civilized countries. Later, as he’s searching for something funny to write he decided that exaggerating that moment of culture shock would be funny.
I think she slipped into German slang there. The German term for “brassiere” is “Büstenhalter”, so I presume BH = bra.
But that’s completly different - sunbathing in a (certain designated) spot in a public park in the summertime is accepted.
There’s a famous spot in the Englischer Garten Park in Munich, too, where people sunbathe topless (the tourists come to oggle, the natives just walk past, because that wrinkled tanned flesh and flabby bellies aren’t that appetizing).
And a guy keeping his underpants on isn’t naked - it’s like a swimming trunk size. Surely Americans do sunbathe in the summer too, to get that wonderful tan for later skin cancers?
Yes, and we wear swimsuits or athletic wear to do it – garments intended for minimal coverage, in many cases, but not underwear (sad to say, huge baggy athletic shorts and swim shorts have become the norm here, but I imagine this will pass). A man may be seen in boxer shorts (a longish, loose style of underwear, in case you don’t know), if, for example, he’s just stepping outside to grab the newspaper, but a man doing the same in briefs would be well advised to keep his eyes open for neighbors, while a woman doing the same in a bra and panties would be well advised to keep a large dog, a very good relationship with her neighbors, and a lawyer on speed dial (in some areas, and depending on her underwear).
It’s actually a subject of some humor here – a woman borrows a bikini to join her hosts in the swimming pool, and is asked “where did you find that?” “Top drawer on the left.” “That’s not a bikini, that’s underwear!” “AAAAAHHH!!” [woman runs like hell back into the house]
That’s a Dave Berg strip from his “Lighter Side Of…” feature in Mad, circa early 1970s.