Cuuuuuuuuute.
Actually, I did. I was in class today eating them and I offered them to the person next to me (no, not the redhead, it was a guy.). He declined, and I joked, “Hmm…they taste just like cardboard. I wonder why no one wants them.” As one, both X and her friend turn around and look at me. So I offered them some. They both laughed and one of them said “Yeah. This milk is REALLY sour. Taste it!”
So at least now I’ve spoken to X. Let’s see what if I can strike up a conversation tomorrow.
Good work Ender. I hope you are able to settle your mind about this. It is commendable that you are so concerned.
Well I’m on the edge of my seat!
[organ chord]
Will Ender speak to her?
[slightly higher organ chord]
Will try to be sly or ask point blank about the bruise?
[slightly higher organ chord]
Will she open up and tell him or Matrix kick him in the head?
Tune in next time when Ender says…
Um…well, it’s semi anti-climatic
I was going to talk to her after class on Friday. As we’re all packing up my things, someone else comes up and asks her where she got her bruise from. Apparently others were curious as well.
She laughs and says she got drunk at her sister’s wedding over the weekend and bashed into a pole while dancing.
So there’s the answer to the best of my knowledge.
Thanks all for your help.
Sorry to hijack the hijack, but in the interest of fighting ignorance, that’s just wrong. I know this because I had a girlfriend in high school who was a hemophiliac. So I looked it up, and although it’s rare, it can happen, and certainly has happened to more than 2 or 3 women in the history of the world.
From: http://www.hemophilia.ca/english/hemophilia/
(Bolding mine)
Ok. So how rare is it? Well, from: http://ublib.buffalo.edu/libraries/projects/cases/hemo.htm
So, while 1 in a million is extremely rare, it’s certainly more than 2 or 3 ever. [/end hijack, with apologies]
Jeg elsker dig, Thomas
I’m not trying to be provocative here, but why is there an assumption being made that if she is indeed being abused that she needs help from you. Presumably she is an adult and can deal with it herself, to the extent that this can be done. While there are no doubt many instances of women remaining in abusive situations, this is due to many factors that you may not be able to do anything about.
IOW, what are you going to do for her if indeed she is being abused, and what makes you think she cannot do these things on her own?
To add some clarification to my previous post, I think if I was being abused I would not necessarily want strangers to mix into it, even with the best intentions. Unless there was actually something they could do for me that I couldn’t do myself, I would find it very unpleasant.
Anyway, my suggestion, FWIW, is to see who her friends are in the class, and ask them about it. This will give you a better ability to assess the situation and what if anything you can do about it.
[ultra-pedantic mode=“fighting ignorance”]
It’s 1 in 100 million not 1 in a million (see the difference?), so it’s even rarer than you think.
[/ultra-pedantic]
That being said, Guinastasia is correct in saying that female hemophiliacs historically would die at the onset of menses. Nowadays, there are blood-clotting treatments (and the Pill?) that allow hemophiliacs to live normally.
Feh - I mistyped. Thanks for the correction.
Yes, the pill is used with female bleeders (both hemophiliacs and women with vonWillebrand Disease). Source: http://www.hemophilia.org/bdi/bdi_women.htm However, that doesn’t translate into “females are not hemophiliacs-there have only been two or three cases in history of female bleeders”.
Again, sorry for the hijack. To add to the thread, though, I agree with IzzyR. Even if this girl is being abused (the accident at the wedding story could be made up as a cover), there’s really nothing you can do for her, anyway. Noble of you to want to, but probably best if you just leave the personal life of a stranger alone.
Ender, you’re a bona fide good person for noticing in the first place and caring enough to check it out.
FTR, I’m a total klutz and bruise easily to boot, so it’s nothing unusual to sport hideous dark splotches in various stages of healing. Cazzle and Zebra put it much better, but lotsa times even technicolor bruises have perfectly innocent origins.
That said, my alcholic Ex knocked me around a fair amount before I finally got shed of him. Splitting the difference here, IzzyR and Shayna have a point: I was so numbed and ashamed I went to elaborate lengths to deny what actually happened. Abuse has its own pathology, and none of it’s pretty. One of the most damaging aspects is the isolation caused by fatigue, pain, disbelief and shame. No, it’s not rational but traumatized people AREN’T rational.
IMO you’re doing exactly the right thing by simply noting, asking and being concerned. It’s very doubtful she’d tell you–or anyone else–even if she is being abused. FWIW what finally turned the key for me was a series of people–friends and strangers–just noting and asking. Light finally dawned that nobody was fooled and nobody was judging, they were simply humanely concerned.
Just stay friendly and aware. Could well be nothing–but if it IS, reminding her that a sane, decent world still exists could help immensely. If nothing else, maybe you’ll make a friend.
Veb
Who hated having to write that but will hit “submit” before she wimps out
Ender, while you may be a shy guy, it sure seems like there’s a whole lot for a girl to like about you. From what most women tell me (as they leave), a great sense of humor and a caring heart are a great start.
Try to get over your shyness, because there’s a lucky gal out there somewhere just waiting to scoop you up.