Where did all these bruises come from??

Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share
1

First off - no, I am not a battered spouse. I am not in denial about being a battered spouse. My husband lives 700 miles away and is known to shake his head in dismay when the subject of my bruises comes up.

I was getting ready to shower last night and I happened to look at myself naked in the big bathroom mirror.

<… pause for those who are visualizing me naked. Apologies to those who have met me and are shuddering at the thought of me naked.>

Anyway, against the pasty whiteness of the skin that lives under a t-shirt most of the time, I saw a lovely purple bruise - on my left breast. <another brief pause> HOW is it that I don’t remember getting it? Further examination made me aware of two fading bruises on my belly, a fairly fresh one on my left arm, a fading one on my left hand (that one I do remember getting), one on my right forearm, and several on my shins (yeah, I remember those, too)

Hi. My name is Michelle, and I’m a klutz. I truly don’t remember getting most of these boo-boos. And it’s not like I have a high pain threshhold - I’m a real wimp when it comes to pain. Still, I have this evidence of numerous encounters between my tender flesh and assorted solid objects, most of which I can’t recall.

Is this self-defense - blocking out bad memories? Is this old age catching up with me? Is it evidence of multiple personalities who get hurt for me? Is it my parents’ fault for not letting me take ballet lessons when I was a kid?

I expect part of it is genetic - my mother bruises if the wind blows too hard. And part of it is that when I’m doing something, that’s what I’m thinking about. Still, one would think a blow hard enough to leave a black-and-blue patch would get my attention. One would think.

So, anyway, make me feel better. Tell me the tales of wounds unnoticed. Relate the time you got all the way home before realizing you were missing a knee. I need to know that I’m not alone in this.

And if you’re still thinking about me naked, sheesh, grow up!!!
:stuck_out_tongue:

2

(I think most of them are “growing up” - that’s the problem! :eek:)

I used to get bruises all the time when I was a kid and not be able to recall what I did to create them - if I was growing up now, my parents would have DCFS after them.

In college, we called them UPBs - Unidentified Party Bruises. Alcohol tended to fog memories of when you might have slammed your shin against a table leg, etc.

3

Bruising easily can be an indicator of other problems. You might want to consult a doctor.

4

It’s a not-uncommon side-effect of a near-miss discharge from 1920’s-style Death Ray. Maybe you should avoid mad scientist’s laboratories in the future.

5

Damn! And when I bought my house, I specified a 1920’s-style Death Ray-free neighborhood. Lyin’ realtors…
Incidentally, Chefguy, I appreciate the concern, but this is something that I’ve dealt with my whole life - just the way I am. Apart from my blood pressure, I’m quite healthy, but bruised.

6

Well, you said you liked it rough. Don’t tell me you’ve blocked the memories already! :smiley:

Same thing happens to me. My wife’s always asking me, “Where’d you get that bruise?” I always have to tell her I don’t know. So I bumped against something - was I supposed to remember that for more than five seconds?

OTOH, last weekend I was moving sleeper sofas from one room to another. I noticed afterwards that I had several bruises. I had no doubts about where I got those bruises.

7

Maybe it’s not bumping into things…I know someone who HAS taken bal…actually, gymnastics and she still has a bunch of purplish bruises. Haven’t gotten around to asking where they came from though.

8

Well, my dear, next time we meet, you’re going to get a major bruise for that crack, and you will remember where it came from! :stuck_out_tongue:

9

I call them Insta-bruises, 'cause they weren’t there a second ago and you have no idea how it got there.

I have one on the inside of my upper thigh right now that looks like something from rough sex.

Scene - Vena Bathroom - early morning -
Hubby: “Where’d you get the bruise?”
Me: “What bruise?”
Hubby (poking it with his finger): “This one, that looks like somebody grabbed your thighs and… HEY!”
Me: “Down, boy. Nobody’s been visiting - you don’t have to worry about that.”
Hubby: “I don’t know - You said you had an evaluation at work… What KIND of evaluation?”
Me: <<sigh>> :rolleyes:

10

I bruise pretty easily too. I was under the impression (I could be wrong) that it had something to do with low iron… never really cared enough to check it out, so feel free to debunk that for me. Mine don’t usually hurt if I don’t know where they came from, do yours?

11

When I was a kid my mom took my to the doctor because I always had bruises on my legs. I’m fine. My legs just bruise really really easily. If I kneel on any semi-solid surface, I end up with two big round bruises just under my kneecaps the next day.

My husband is the one, though, who gets injuries without knowing about them. He had a bruise the size of a grapefruit on the back of his leg just a few months ago and had no idea where it came from. The next week there was a gash in his calf that he was unaware of until I pointed it out.

12

I bruise from someone looking at me too hard. Ryujin always jokes that people will think he beats me. I honestly can’t remember, or even notice half of them.

13

No, unless I press on them, they don’t usually hurt. The one on my hand did, tho, and I think that’s because it was at the base of my thumb and every time I moved my thumb, I felt it.

Anyway, I’m glad to know I’m not the only one who’s so sensitive and delicate. :smiley:

14

I bruise easily too. It freaks me out, because according to my mom, it’s a sympton of diabetes (she’s a type 1 diabetic). Fun!

15

Sounds familiar. Mr. Maureen swears the people at work are beating me. Usually it’s filing cabinets, the drawer next to my desk, and, on one really weird occasion, a pencil sharpener. Please don’t ask. People are still laughing at me. All I will say is, nobody should disguise a pencil sharpener like that…

16

Oh, I bruise easier than an overripe peach. (This guy at work keeps asking if I’ve had a platelet count done recently. Yes, it’s fine, thank you.) And I usually don’t know where they come from. I think it’s because I’ve been clumsy all my life and just don’t have enough brain space to devote to the myriad memories of running into things. Just this morning I noticed a bruise on the back of my ankle when I put on my socks. Now, last week I knocked my forehead against the t.v. stand hard enough to see stars so I did remember whence that bruise originated but usually I haven’t a clue. As long as there’s no blood involved, I don’t worry about it.

17

Awww…FCM, I’d give you a big hug but I’d probably bruise you.
I get ‘em all the time too, and usually I don’t know about them until **Mrs. B. ** points them out.
Gettin’ old ain’t for wussies.

18

Don’t know but it happens to me, too. I’m always covered in bruises.

19

My latest one, on my left calf, came from shutting the car door before I stepped all the way out of the way. Nothing like a metal point to add color to the body. 'Specially when you do it twice in one day!! :eek:

20

I don’t usually bruise easily but a week spent in hospital getting anti-clotting injections everyday left me black and blue. Thankfully the effect seems to be wearing off.