first family vacation with the conservative in-laws, a Nirvana t-shirt with the words “Fudge Packin Crack Smokin Satan Worshipping Mother Fucker” on the back
Two guys shoppping together
A crowded store
A stuck zipper
Jammed changing room door
*Originally posted by LouisB *
My wife made me take the movie off-line, but you might still be able to find it with a search engine and some well chosen terms.
I can’t make hide nor hair out of the stick-figure drawing, so I don’t think that will help.
I was…uhh…getting out of the bathtub and I just slipped and fell on it. I swear.
In the drugstore, looking for the astroglide.
Summon the courage to ask the attractive lady-employee where it is
Who summons the total hottie to ask where it is
Who summons the grand-motherly type to ask where it is
Who asks if KY won’t do just as well in a pinch?
A surgeon named Dr.Cobb
A sedative that removes your inhibitions and leaves you awake and TALKATIVE but unable to remember anything that you said.
Rectal surgery
Having someone say to you “Well I guess you’ll have a Cobb up your ass for sure in the morning”
Working with Dr. Cobb everyday.
Curiosity, a condom, a banana, wife coming home early.
A duck,
A hose,
And this hour.
My mother.
My in-laws.
Lots of wine.
Hide me.
Patty
Buying Astroglide, a Hitachi Magic Wand and Puppy Puddle Pads…
My Principal AND HER 16-YEAR OLD DAUGHTER check into line behind me.
“Oh, hi Mr. Albert. Uhhh…”
Next day, I got a “See me” note in my mailbox.
A midget, A poodle, Orange peals, Car insurance bills
A best friend who is supposed to come over to your place with her boyfriend for the three of you to go out somewhere, but doesn’t answer her cell when you call to tell her that you’re getting out of work early, so you leave a message on YOUR answering machine, hoping that she’ll listen to that instead. You don’t see her car, so you walk into your house… to find her and her boyfriend “enjoying themselves” on your couch.
[sub]Hey, I think I handled it well. I looked down at her and said “Finish, continue, whatever. I’ll be in the kitchen” and walked through without a blink.[/sub]
A labiodental fricative and a big wad of saliva.
My ex Girlfriend at the bar that I showed up at with my new girlfriend that I cheated with on my ex girlfriend…ouch babe!
Speeding in my truck, a pretty gal walking down the street, a telephone pole.
Too much tequila and beets for dinner. (Not me)
WARNING- GROSSNESS FOLLOWS!
Long hair, lots of roomates, getting a little oral at the wrong time of the month. Can I get a ‘There’s Something About Mary?’
A sweet, white-haired dog. The beautiful hottie of the neighborhood walking towards me. She is apparently menstruating. The doggie goes a-sniffin’.
Somewhere along the same lines:
Arlington Cemetery
Dead Kennedys t-shirt, “Too Drunk to Fuck” print on the back.
No, not me. I don’t have a death wish.
Playing hide and seek on the first floor of a furniture store in the middle of Atlanta, and being NAKED at the time.
Tyklfe
Playing hide and seek on the first floor of a furniture store in the middle of Atlanta, and being NAKED at the time.
oh yes, and then having the lights come on…
Oops…
Tyklfe
Looking over at the next check-out.
A bed, a cell-phone, some rope