My boyfriend (we can call him Jake) and I have been together for about 3 years, we are both 24. We dont live together but I sleep over at his house pretty much every day. Jake and I communicate very candidly, and we are both comfortable enough with each other to have awkward conversations.
My problem is that he thinks its okay, normal, funny… ect to walk into the bathroom when I am using it. I don’t have a problem with him coming in if I am brushing my teeth, flossing, plucking, or whatever other grooming I may be doing. I don’t think anyone should see me going to the bathroom. I feel like that is a very private thing. I am not one of those girls who pretend like guys don’t know girls poop or fart. He has become almost obsessed with finding out when I am doing this. The lock on the door doesn’t work because, new doors were put in incorrectly. It wouldn’t really matter though, because even when there was a working lock, he would pick the lock to come in. I have tried all kinds of ways to get him to stop. I have discussed it calmy, telling him how it bothers me and why, tried freaking out when he does it, rewarding him when he goes a while without doing it, and nothing works. He says he doesn’t understand why since he knows thats what I am doing in there anyway. At his parents house they all do the same thing, so I see where he gets it from. Even with company over they will leave the door open while they use it. Growing up my mom used to do this same thing, and we all hated it. I told myself that I never want to be that way.
Another thing I would do is say I wont stay over if it keeps happening, but I always just give in, because I want to stay the night with him or also because I am just too lazy to drive the 45 minutes back to my house.
Any ideas on how to stop this?