It makes a terrible eye wash, though.
YEEEEEEOOOOOOOOOOWWWWWWWWW!!!
I never have the strength of conviction not to open threads like this.
Carry on.
I was told it was an astringent.
Silliness aside, semen (and spit) are excellent for removing protein-based stains (for example, blood) from fabrics. It’s around here somewhere in one of my textile books.
I have used spit on bloodstains before, so I know* that* actually does work.
I don’t have the right bits myself to see if semen works.
Ms B., you’re a brave woman to post a set-up line like that. The offers should start pouring in right about…
Oh dear…
Wasn’t there some porn star that was going on a semen-only diet?
And then there’s always using it as hairgel (from There’s Something about Mary}
Well, obviously, it’s used as a show of affection, like flowers…
No, no, no. It’s semen (and* swallow*)
The bukkake arrangement, from FTD. Say it with semen. 
Hmmm…dunno if that would work. Would depend, I imagine, on its airspeed velocity and if it’s African or European.
Yes, a Japanese girl lived on fresh semen plus one egg per day for a week (allegedly). It was somewhere on http://www.jlist.com .
One time some landed on my shirt and bleached the color out. So I guess it can be used as a spot remover.
They are good for manning ships of all kinds.
Wait, you didn´t say sea men?
I need glasses ASAP
It works great for impeaching presidents.
Having a dress with the right semen on it can make you famous and get you a book deal and on TV. Just ask Monica Lewinski.
It serves a minor purpose to propogate the species.
Philip seamore Hoffman used his to pin up notes and postcards on the wall in the movie “happiness.”
Boy did I misread that URL.
Also, who’s gonna be the first to unite this thread with this other classic and once and for all answer the burning question: what happens if you pan-fry fish in semen?
I am not aware of any commercial uses but I enjoy making it (painstaingly, by hand and great attention to detail) so I end up with a lot of surplus. If anyone is in need just let me know.