Personally, I think that I have the correct credentials for media scheduling. So that’s my job.
The Happy Fun Squad is part of an unnamed, unheard of Scylla Government Agency. Secret service? Maybe.
lno, I have to kill you now. You know too much.
::: smothers lno with a smooch-of-death to keep him quiet :::
Scylla, Mr. President sir, I’d be honoured to serve in your Secret Police.
Elly, adjusting her signature to reflect the changes in policy.
Your secret governmental powers have no effect on me. I shall never be silenced. The truth shall set me free.
Sic semper tyrannis!
[sub]Well, maybe they have a LITTLE effect. A cumulative one.[/sub]
** lno **, I know where you live.
E.
You know the address for the SDMB Popular People’s Front. Little do you know that it’s just a front for the People’s Front of the SDMB. And that’s just a front for the SDMB People’s Front.
We’re like a matruskha doll, we are, and you’ll never track us down.
Well, unless you look in the phone book … we didn’t pay extra to be unlisted.
Hmm, he presents an interesting conundrum. Since I have no phonebook handy I conclude the only other option is to kill everyone and let God sort it out.
…
:eek:
Oh my! Power really does corrupt. Good thing I’m just the Sec. of Ag.
I humbly accept this assignment. For the next few years, I shall wear many Laminated ID Cards, carry copious credentials and be seen festooned with 4 or 5 camera bodies around my neck at all times. I’ll not shave regularly, and my photographs will become the standard by which all White House Photographers shall be judged.
I will win the Pulitzer Prize and donate my winnings to UNICEF.
I will take sensitive and kindly portraits. I will rarely exploit situations. I will shoot both color and black & white.
I will attempt to document the humane as well as human side of the Administration. I will avoid the obvious trap of falling in love with my Laboratory Administrator, and instead maintain decorum at all times.
I will not wear plaid bowties. I will not remove my earring. I will not tattoo the White House Seal on my buttocks.
I will serve my President as best as I can, and fulfill all of his/her image-creating needs.
Sincerely,
Cartooniverse
Hey it looks like Scylla won’t be having a cabinet after all…we just had a coup…Splutter declared himself supreme ruler:
http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?threadid=123958
Grim…
NONE, you silly goose. Don’tcha think I haven’t pulled the same exact trick myself?
Bosda…
A spurious lie if I ever heard one. EVERYONE knows that, A: I enjoy the comfy feeling of lacey thong panties, and B: I ALWAYS go out in public with at least a garbage bag over my loins…
Err…
I mean…
I was drunk?
I hereby submit my résumé for the Chief White House Plumber position. I will do my job well, and assure you reëlection. I’m looking forward to my brief stint in prison and the radio talk show I’ll get after that.
So what does that make me?
Four words: White House Travel Office
Can’t I get a top level FBI job instead?
I can’t believe I didn’t see this thread earlier.
I am so in line for the Chairman of the Joint Chiefs of Staff.
Tripler
Four stars? Better make it 6. . .
Oh, god, Tripler as one of the Joint Chiefs? You might as well just nuke the planet now and save all the hassle…
Doesn’t it make sense for the Drug Czar to also be one of the Joint Chiefs?
BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAAA
----wheeze----
“No news at 11.”
Damned straight, skippy.
You want access to the archives??? Huh??? Talk to Eve !!!
Give me your tired, your poor, your yearning to break free intercontinental ballistic missiles that have endured the shackles and chains of a Cold War. . .
Give me 30 minutes, and I’ll give you a cold, frosty/hot, dusty world.
Tripler
Temperature dependant on whether you are at a target location.