I think fuckwit is great. Other faves are butt-munch and ass-bite.
My all-time favorite (for now) has got to be ass-clown. The only problem I have with that one is, I find it SO funny that any time I want to use it I end up busting out laughing. (But since that usually cures me of whatever I was mad about, maybe that still makes it a good one.)
And come on, guys, I can’t believe nobody has mentioned the unmentionable, that most appropriate of inappropriate curses,
[big ass] + [fucking] + [bruise] = BIG ass FUCKing BRUISE
has a completely different stress pattern (and interpretation) than
[big] + [ass fucking] + [bruise] = BIG ASS fucking BRUISE
With the first case, you get a primary stress on big and a secondary stress on ass (English generally assigns a primary stress on the first element of a compound noun/phrase i.e. White House [primary + secondary] vs. white house [primary + primary]) and primary stresses on fucking and bruise.
With the second case, you get a primary stress on big, a primary stress on ass, a secondary stress on fucking (the second element of the phrase ‘ass fucking’), and a primary on bruise
Only case 2 implies any sort of backdoor lovin’.
As for myself, I prefer a hearty God Damn but have been known to dabble with Christ on a pony and ass-munching cum-dribbler.
i love assclown too!. i have seen a porno called ‘Ass Clowns’!. it has girls dressed up with red clown noses and face paint while getting jizzed on. the makers proclaimed that ‘it’s some funny shit to jerk off to’. personally, i think annexing ‘clown’ onto simple expletives is going to be the future of clever curse words.
for example, how about DOUCHE-CLOWN? or u might wish to refer to a ditzy little slut as a Cum-clown.
These might not count, because they tend to be phrases rather than single-word insults, but I like to be specific. I’ve actually said these to people at one time or another:
Itdon’tmatterjustdon’tbiteit, motherfucker!!!
I bet you’re sitting on a chair in an empty room, with nothing but your social security check, a bottle of cheap vodka, and a telephone, determined to piss all over the world because nobody’s looked at your gnarled cunt in forty years.
Do us all a favor and quit eating the paint chips, pigfucker.
For contractions, though, you just can’t go wrong with “jiveass motherfucker.”
Syphalated Side Effect of a Southern Siberian Grudge-Fuck! Contributed by my friend Gary, circa 1978. A REALLY fancy way to call someone a bastard (I think).
Holy Sheep-shit! - Much used. I say Sheep-shavings in polite company.
Crap on Toast - Ewww…
And a little poem from my Dad. I have been known to fix an evil glare on someone and hit 'em with the whole thing, but it only works if they stand still for a few minutes.
When bleeding piles torment you,
And corns upon your feet.
When crabs as big as horsefleis
Upon your meat do eat.
And when you’re old and feeble
And a syphiletic wreck
I hope you fall through your asshole
And break your bloody neck!
Actually, my rule is not to be vulgar just for vulgarity’s sake. If a thread is too crude to be in the other forums, but it’s not really a rant, I just close it. Like I’m gonna do NOW.
