There was an article in a Dutch magazine (here it is, in Dutch) about “sex coaches”, a professional service to adult men who were still virgins and didn’t want to be. The article was called: “Finally doing it”. I wondered if there was such a thing in the US, and if anyone tried it.
Before you say: “Yeah, they’re called hookers”, no, this was something different. The article described men in their forties for whom sex just never happened. And by now, their virginity had gotten so charged emotionally that it actually stood in the way of getting a meaningful relationship. “What if she finds out I’m a virgin” “What do I do?” etcetera.
The service consisted out of a few sessions of therapist talks, followed by a few practice dates with a woman “physical therapist”. The woman enjoyed guiding the men through the process, gave them gentle feedback , taught them the basics.
There were also males providing the same service for female virgins who didn’t want to be virgins anymore.
The article made it sound like a good thing, and a good solution to a very real problem.
ETA Well, apparently there is. This is the first link (SFW) I got from googling “sex coach” .
I think this is an excellent idea - not just for the men, but also for the women who they will eventually have relationships with.
Elevating sex onto a pedestal is stupid. Like anything else in life, it’s a skill that can be learned, can be taught, can be done poorly or can be done well. It’s good that there are professionals who can help men for whom this is an issue.
Here is the link to a BBC documentary “Virgin school” of a 26 year old guy who followed their program. But the article said most clients are men in their forties, and that such virgins constitute about 4 % of the population.
(below: bad babelfish translation from the Dutch article)
Every time I read anything about the Netherlands - whether it be 17th-century history or current-day events - makes it more and more appealing to me. William the Silent, Maurice and Frederik Hendrik really outdid themselves when they set up that place.
One of my mom’s friends (she would never tell me which one) did something like that twenty years or so ago in California. Mom referred to her as a “sexual surrogate.”
Apparently, we Dutch are not progressive at all, but merely doing everything thirty years later then you guys in the USA.
Still, I think it is a good idea. But then again, I wear maxi skirts, too. And am I the only one who this reminds of the “donii women” and “First Rites” of the Clan of the Cavebear novels?
i’d just like to point out that the Google advertisment currently displays “12-hour bladder infection cure”
Who was the computer programmer responsible for this? Maybe ,ya know, a 40 year old guy?
And am I the only one who this reminds of the “donii women” and “First Rites” of the Clan of the Cavebear novels?