Public farting

Since buying a laptop, I’ve been working outside my house a lot more often, which is a blessing. However, the freedom of working from home comes with certain perks. You can take off your shoes. You can sit in comfortable positions and furniture. You can have a snack. You can, bluntly, fart whenever you want.

You can’t do that in a coffee shop, or god forbid the library.

I find myself waiting until the music at the coffee shop gets loud, or has…let’s say, staccato beats, until I can quietly sneak one out when necessary. It’s only when I can’t hold it back, and only when moving to the bathroom (my preferred public farting place) would be a moot point, because as soon as I move it’ll all be over.

Yeah, I’m kind of gross. :o

But given some of the horrible threads I’ve seen here, I know you guys are, too. Who else does this? Do you play coy like me? Do you clamp it down like Fort Knox? Do you just let fly and hope for th best?

Great username/post combo. I try to be discreet about toots outside the home. My office chair is nicely cushioned at work. Thank goodness. I fear bending over to file something in the bottom drawer, and having a loud blast emerge, however. If I’m feeling gassy, I do not file things in the bottom drawers. Of the filing cabinet.

I’ve never heard my co-workers (98% women) fart. Everyone else must be discreet, too.

I fart in the library all the time.

I’m a librarian.

The only people I’ve heard fart at work are men, the disgusting creatures. And both were in IT. Make of that what you will.

So that’s why books smell like that.

I work for a small-market radio station, so the atmosphere is pretty much that of a frat house – all that’s missing is the shaved goat running down the hallway. Hell, we have contests to see who can fart the loudest!

Having said that, we also have very proper ladies who work here, so the flatulance is confined to offices or studios where there are no ladies present, and even then there are commonly recognized warning signs (the program director wildly spraying SpringBerry Breeze is a good one).

I think most people wouldn’t appreciate complete strangers dropping air biscuits nearby. On the other hand, there’s nothing like a good anal burp to break the ice and make new friends.

I’m in IT… I’ve been so engulfed in my work that I’ve forgotten where I was and let fly whilst in my cube. Normally, I’m sitting in such a way that the fart is muffled/absorbed by my chair, but when I’m deep in thought and in the middle of a program, I’m generally leaning forward. The sounds that farts make while sitting in this position are very interesting, indeed.

Hey, wait…aren’t you married to one of the guys from IT at your work? I have to think that doesn’t count.
As for me, I try not to fart at work even if I’m alone because that’s always when all of a sudden you are not alone. I did risk it this morning though and it worked out okay.

Us ladies are masters of the one cheek sneak!

A fun game to play with your sibilngs is trying to fart just loud enough in restaurants and other public places to antagonize your mother but not so loud that strangers can hear it.

It’s just as funny at age 38 as it was at age 10.

That reminds me of a story from my IT worker husband. He shares an office with his friend/boss. One day his boss farted really loudly and said “ooops!” in a silly voice.
When my husband started laughing he looked up all shocked and apologized “I thought you were gone!”

So I guess when IT guys get in the zone they just fart willy-nilly.

…clamp it down like Fart Knox?

The rest of the time, too.

Note to co-workers: Your headphones block the sound of your pooting, but that does not mean that we cannot hear it.


Hell, I farted during the OP.

I love farting willy-nilly. And us girls can sometimes give just as good as the guys do, but we oftentimes refrain. Must keep up with appearances and all that rot. :wink: Besides, the look of shock on the guys’ faces when we do make with the ass trumpet is one of life’s simple pleasures!

Yes! We should hang out sometime. :slight_smile:

As for work, I alone may be responsible for at least 40 percent of the pollution in this building. I figure if I’ve got to put up with the aggravating habits of my co-workers, they’ve got to put up with mine. But I’m quiet.

What about the poor person that gets your fart-filled office chair after you leave the company?

Think of it as a… gift.

My husband and I are so comfortable farting around each other that I find myself letting fly in public places without thinking about it. I’m totally going to be one of those old ladies that unabashedly farts all the time. :smiley: :cool:


Ever crop-dusted an aisle in a store?