Public farting

Thank God I’m not sharing an office anymore is what I say. :wink: Although when I was sharing? It was with a guy. And he said anything I could do would not possibly touch the pollution and noise level of the guy he shared with before. :smiley:

I’m still laughing from the OP opening. Seriously, you got an opening for a best selling novel right there!
Public farting by beanpod

[FONT=Times New Roman]Chapter 1

Since buying a laptop, I’ve been working outside my house a lot more often, which is a blessing. However,[/FONT]

Sounds like good bathroom reading material! :smiley:

I used to work in a video store. A few of us would crop dust the kids’ section all the time. If an adult smells it, everyone blames the kids.

Ah yes, the Dewey Decibel System.

Nah, lieu, it’s probably smelLC.

OK, Full Disclosure: Yes, my husband is in IT at work … but this was TWO OTHER GUYS. Farting comes with the territory, when it comes to husbands. I see no reason why I should have to endure the farts the REST of them emit, however.

:smiley:

:wink:

This is beautiful, and brought a tear to me eye.

  • Dazz, who turned 40 yesterday, but cherishes and nurtures her inner 12 year old boy.

Yes, I’m imagining it like a scene straight out of North By Northwest.

I am so embarrassed by farting, in private much less in public! I am embarrassed when my husband hears me fart! I don’t know how you guys manage.

Though I am learning to be a little more laid back about it. I’ve been rather farty lately, but because it is due to a healthy change in my diet, I almost am sort of proud.

P.S. I’m blushing furiously. I can’t believe I admitted that!

But of course! I saw a birthday card once that said something like, “I hope you like this card. It was the first one I could grab because someone farted in the card aisle.” I laughed myself silly reading that - card aisles are my favourite!

olives, does it help to know that all men think farting is the pinnacle of humour? You’re depriving your husband of a genuine source of entertainment. :smiley:

My cites - Fart scene from “Blazing Saddles” and “Family Guy” Dueling Farts.

Be nice! All guys know farting is only funny, when you’re not the victim. Okay, maybe it’s a little funny when you’re the victim. Or not. In fact, it’s not funny at all now that I think about it. So, why am I giggling right now? OH, I just farted.

One of the great joys of my job is the somewhat solitary nature and the industrial fans that are constantly on. Farting with impunity is at least as important of a benefit as health insurance when it comes to job selection.

Farting is not funny!

Unless I leave a buddy or coworker wallowing in my fart through strategic bombing tactics, that is. That’s hilarious.

Be glad you were on the other end of the table at Pizza House. Just sayin’.

I’m giggling like a 12 year old reading this thread. It makes me kinda wish I still had a husband to dutch-oven.

The downside of living alone is, when you fart, you absolutely cannot blame it on the dogs. Mine know better, and always give me the stink-eye.

I have a cousin who never farts in front of her boyfriend. They’ve been dating for around 10 years. I have no idea how she keeps it in - she is honestly the gassiest gal I know.

As for me, I’ve had a couple accidental “blame-on-the-other-guy” incidents. Basically, I’ll let loose a SBD, and people just tend to blame the guy who is nearby. Couldn’t be me - I’m so pretty and sweet! Oh, and one of the accidental blame incidents - was with my dad.

Susan

Ok, a really mangled metaphor. :slight_smile: I stand by the imagery, though.