You Picked A Fine Time To Leave Me, Loose Wheel
Next?
VERY old joke and not particularly funny joke that ends with a musical pun.
[spoiler]
Rudolph Ivanovich, a high Communist official in the Kremlin, woke up one morning, looked out the window, and said, “Ugh, looks like rain.”
His wife looked out and said, “Not at all- it’s going to be a fine, sunny day.”
He insisted, “No, I see clouds on the horizon- it’s definitely going to rain.”
She asked, “What makes you so sure?”
He answered, [/spoiler]
“Rudolph the Red knows rain, Dear.”
Johnny Cash in Germany: “I Walk The Rhine”
Ray Charles performed for Pope Alexander VI: “Borgia on My Mind”
Hairway To Stephen
Glen Campbell’s epic song of quarry herders: “(Like a) Limestone Cowboy”
Harry Chapin on Schroedinger at Hanukkah: “Cat’s in the Dreidel”
Bob Dylan’s ballad on dating a Star Trek actresss: “Knocking on Seven’s Door”
Stevie Nicks joins a 12-Step Program: “Alcoholics Rhiannonymus”
Adele’s advice to Pinky to stand up for himself: “Set Fire to the Brain”
Ferdinand Feghoot was visiting a planet of intelligent pearls. One of their greatest legal scholars, Michael Erster, attempted suicide by leaping into the acidic seas, upset that instead of having a smooth surface, he had sand embedded in it, a relic of his shameful past. Feghoot walked into the murky seas barefoot and quickly found the distraught creature, bringing him back to safety.
When asked how he managed, Feghoot told them the way to keep him on task was to keep singing, “A gritty pearl is Michael, L.L.D.”
(My favorite feghoot. Even better than the furry with the syringe on top)
So far, the one to beat! Awesome!
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This needs work, but in a room of celebrity pictures where Roseanne’s is surrounded by a large number of John, Paul, George and Ringo:
99 Beatles and Barr on the wall
…with four hungry children and a crock in the field.
…and an old favorite:
Seasoned in the Slums
Mad cow disease was spreading fast and the dairy farmers in Austria had to act fast. They buried the dead cows and quarantined all the groaning sick ones.
The Ills are Alive with the Sound of Moo Sick.
A true log’s a many-splintered thing.
Bob Dylan’s- Lady Elaine
An old chestnut:
Roy Rogers had a brand new pair of shoes, and went to show them to Dale Evans. Being polite, he removed his shoes and leaves them at the door. While visiting, Dale’s cat discovers Roys new shoes, likes the smell and proceeds to chew them up. Roy goes ballistic. Dale, feeling very bad, has a dilemma: she has two cats. One of the cats enters the room at that moment. Dale turns to him and asks: “Pardon me, Roy, is that the cat that chewed your new shoes?”
Gordon Lightfoot’s song panning a Werner Herzog/Klaus Kinski film, “The Wreck of the German Fitzcarraldo”
One of those dump sites that has had so much toxic liquid waste added to the mix that it is now the
Slurry with the Fridge on Top
Lamont Cranston’s chauffeur, Moe Shrevnitz, was sent on an important mission to pick up some candy. He purchased it, but set the bag down for a moment, and it was stolen. Looking around, he saw a small blond boy eating the same candy. He walked up to the boy and asked, “Pardon me, goy, is that the Shadow’s nougat you chew?”
Nope, sorry. Don’t get it.
Watch all of this: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-RvGd2S3I8M
Of Isolated M fame?
And THIS is the version I will tell from now on!! 
A guy is climbing to the top of Mount Everest. He has two steps to go when one of them notices the heel on his right show is a little loose, yet he decides to continue. At the next step, the heel comes up and the guy goes tumbling down the mountain.
As he goes by, he passes a couple of climbers.
First climber: Think we should help him?
Second climber: No, as he was going dowing I heard him singing “You picked a fine time to leave me, loose heel.”