I’ve made kind of a hobby of learning shaggy dog stories with puns fro endings. I’m trying to “Collect them all”. I’ll try to list the ones I know, and if any of y’all brilliant, cultured people can add to the list please do so.
Also, since shaggy dog stories are long, and the set-up varies, I’ll list them by punch line:
“Pardon me Roy, Is that the cat who chewed your new shoes”
“No one will rescue a damsel in 'dis dress”
“Only Hugh can prevent florist friars”
“Two obese Pattys’, special Ross, Lester Cheatem picking bunions on a sesame street bus”
“A super-calloused fragile mystic plagued with halitosis”
“Making an obscene clone fall”
“Transporting young gulls across state lions for immoral (Or immortal) porpoises”
“It’s a knick-nack, Patty Wack, give the frog a loan”
“Silly Rabbi, Kicks are for Trids”
Any others? (I would be happy to describe the set up of any of these if anyone wishes).
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He’s a Haifa-lootin’, Newton-shootin’, son of a nun from Arizona.
Amost every episode of “Peabody’s Improbable History” on “Rocky and Bullwinkle” is a perfect example, especially considering what Mr. Peabody is.
Check out the “My Word! Stories” books by Denis Norden and Frank Muir. You can hear repeats of the program on some NPR stations, and some have webcasts. Radio Australia broadcasts them once a week. You can hear my favorite story on my web page http://www.geocities.com/rowrrbazzle/. Two other punch lines: “Hail to thee, Bligh’s parrot! ‘Bert’ thou never wert”; “We who are about to sigh, dilute thee”.
To add a couple more of Isaac Asimov’s to the one chrisk gave:
A niche in time saves Stein.
Give my big hearts to Maude, Ray. Dismember me for Harold’s choir. Tell all the Foys on Sortibackenstrete that I will soon be there. (You can find the whole story, “The Death of a Foy”, on the web.)
The whole joke is about evil sexual rice crispies taking over the world, and each time, a team of scientists figure out a way to defeat them, but they keep coming back, and finally, when the person you’re telling the joke to asks if it ever ends, you say the above.
