'Quando omni flunkus, moritati' (latin translation help requested please)

Fans of The Red Green Show* will recognize the thread title as a pseudo-Latin translation of the Possum Lodge motto “When all else fails, play dead” I need a motto for my Warhammer 40 Astra Militarum force, the proud XXIII Praetorian - “The Knights of Perdicia”. I’m prepared to use the Red Green translation of “When all else fails, play dead” but I’d prefer a translation that has some historical and grammatical legitimacy if possible. I’ve tried Google translate but I don’t trust it and don’t doubt the Doper community can provide a better answer.

Any help with this Latin translation would be greatly appreciated. My WH40K and Red Green fixations have been brought to my therapist’s attention.
*Yes, some people, myself included, will admit to being entertained by the show.

I will too, I guess.

Quando defuit totus alius, mortuus simula.
Quando defuit totus alius, mortui simulate.

Google translate is your friend.
When all else fails, you die - Cum omnia defecerunt, moriemini

Fiddling with individual words, this looks more succinct:
Post totum desero, pereo - After all else fails, I die. (or “cado” - I perish)

IIRC there is no K in Latin. “C” is the hard “k” sound.
Not sure if it’s good latin, and the right person or tense.

I’m imagining the theme from “Rocky” singing “…gonna die now…♫”

You listed two different translations. Please describe the differences between them. Maybe different verb tenses?

md2000, your translation is based on an incorrect understanding of my query and thus is faulty.

Emphasis added by me.

I made it clear that my troopers don’t die like this. They “play dead”. When the outlook seems desperate, they don’t stand their ground and meet their fate like good servants of the Emperor. Instead, they hide in the mud with their flashlight and hope the scary genestealers don’t notice them.

There’s a reason they wear brown trousers.

Some (like me) will even admit to following much of his sage advice!

If the women don’t find ya handsome, they should at least find ya handy!

I love Red Green. I would join the Possum Lodge but In don’t think they let girls in.

They’re different numbers. Mortuus simula is the command “play dead!” addressed to one person; mortui simulate is the same commad addressed to a group of people.

But, while that’s the English idiom, Latin mottoes are not normally expressed as commands in the second person - addressed to “you”, either singular or plural. The motto is either the motto of the individual warrior, in which case it’s expressed in the first person singular, or of the company of soldiers as a collective, in which case it’s expressed in the first person plural. Either way, it wouldn’t be expressed as a command in the imperative voice - you can’t issue a command to yourself - but as a promise or vow or simple statement.

In which case you want . . . mortuus simulo (“I simulate a dead man”) or . . . mortui simulamus (“we simulate dead men”). Or you could use the subjective voice: . . . mortuus simulem (“let me simulate a dead man”)/mortui simulemus (“lets us simulate dead men”).

“I’m a man, but I can change, if I have to, I guess.”

UDS, there are plenty of Latin mottos in the imperative.
Carpe diem ‘Seize the day’
Disce aut discede ‘Learn or depart’
Esto perpetua ‘Be perpetual’ or ‘May it be perpetual’
Memento mori ‘Remember that you die’
Salus populi suprema lex esto ‘Let the people’s welfare be the supreme law’
Sapere aude ‘Dare to know’
Si quæris peninsulam amœnam circumspice ‘If you seek a pleasant peninsula, look about you’
Viriliter age ‘Act manfully’

Yes, there are. My bad. I was thinking of "motto’ in a limited sense as a personal or group identifier, where the motto is not, say, sage advice but rather a claim made about myself/ourselves.

Setting aside the issue of translation, I just want to remark that that motto is quite frankly Heresy of the lowest sort. The Emperor frowns on cowardice!

Not for Latin translations, it isn’t. (I don’t trust it to translate any other language correctly either. It’s fine to get the general gist of longer texts, but don’t expect the translation to be idiomatic or even grammatically or semantically correct.)

Why would it be mortuus and not mortuum ?

Also why not “alia omnia” vs “totus alius”, “defecit” vs “defuit” ? I’m not claiming any particular expertise or knowledge; I would honestly learn a lot from a detailed explanation.

Quando defuit totus alius, mortui simulamus!

I think we have a winner, Many thanks to johanna and UDS.

When I see the Emperor get his fuzzy butt off that throne, come down to the line and show us how it’s done, fine.

That one definitely can’t be correct, because the (jussive/hortative) subjunctive would be “simulemus”, with a long “e”. So “mortuos simulemus”.

Something like “quando alia omnia deficiunt, mortuos simulemus” seems closer, but still unidiomatic.
We also haven’t considered such phrases as “irritis ceteris remediis”

I would have thought a play on the Space Marines’ “…and they shall know no fear” would be appropriate.

I bought a Possum Lodge lapel pin a few years back from RG’s website. No questions were asked about my gender. Give it a try. Maybe there’s a secret Possum Lodge Auxiliary for women who like men that guess they’re willing to change if there’s no alternative.

By the way, for any of you who are interested, google Patrick McKenna (“Harold”). He’s a fascinating and accomplished man.