Question to Parents

The BBQ Pit
1

Would you leave your children with 2 Girls age 14 & 13?, now just the age says a Big Fat NO to me, but not only are they young, but they are runaways - who could just up and leave anytime.

A Father in Minneapolis, MN left his 4 Children - ages 5, 3, 2, & 1 with 2 Runaway Girls - 14 & 13, that he was mentoring to. He is an out of work Minister, I don’t know what kind of work he is doing now, but his Children ended up missing, appearantly the 2 girls took the children to The Mall of America - which is pretty freaking hugh, and not to mention packed with shoppers doing Christmas Shopping, the children and girls disappeared. The Children were found and brought back home. The Father wants the 2 girls who have been found and taken into police custody charged as adults.

Isn’t the Father at fault also, isn’t it is bad judgement to leave children with girls that young? And the circumstances that are involved as well, aren’t the best judgement either.

What do you think?

2

I was babysitting at the age of 13/14. I wouldn’t have taken the kids to a mall, but the age itself doesn’t seem a problem for me.

3

Lots of babysitters’re that age.

4

One of the girls has lived in the house off/on for the past few years. From what the news was saying, the girls had taken the children to the MoA the day before, and had gotten into trouble for it. The man told the girl that had been in the house for a while that because she broke the rules, she was being returned home. She didn’t want to go home, so took off.

Would I leave my child with a 13/14 year old? Yes, especially if that child had been part of the household for a considerable time. I would guess the children thought her to basically be a sibling.

I give the teenagers some credit- they didn’t take off leaving the children home alone (which sadly does occur quite often). I can understand their fear- they effed up BIG time, and they knew there was going to be BIG trouble when they came back. I’m sure they didn’t expect the media focus or to be jailed. Dad wants them to be charged as adults, which will not happen.

5

In this particular case, there appeared to be some other issues at work, but in general, no, 13-14 is not nessecarily too young to babysit. It really does depend on the individual youngster.

When my children were small, I had a some very good, reliable babysitters that age, and when my son was 12, I judged him to be level-headed enough to start leaving him in charge of his sisters for short periods of time.

Now my youngest, at 12, has just completed the Red Cross babysitting class and wants to start babysitting for neighbors. She’s a smart, responsible girl, and if the parents and Bluesman and I are both comfortable with the situation, (i.e., no infants yet), I see no reason why she shouldn’t.

6

I started babysitting at 14, and was a great sitter. The one time I had a problem, I called my mom for help. The point of a babysitter is not to be able to handle things as an adult would, but to know enough to call in an adult when things are hectic. Anyway, what adult would work for $2.50 an hour, as I did?

Charging the two girls as adults is asinine. Did they do anything particularly heinous? No - they merely showed bad judgement. The fact that children oftentimes practice bad judgement is why we have juvenile courts in the first place.

7

Paging Linky McLinkerstein…

[sub]and yes, I would. I started babysitting at 11 and never managed to get myself jailed for kidnapping[/sub]

8

No fucking way! What possibly could a 13 yr old do in an emergency situation?

I am reluctant to leave my kid with his grandparents, fer crimany sake!

Dude is an idiot.

BCS stands for (illegitimate child) + (crowing rooster) + (Tootsie Pops)

9

There’s a 14 year old at my church that I would trust with my kid. She’s a horse of a different color, though, ULTRA mature and responsible.

The age isn’t a problem in the situation in the OP. It’s the girls themselves.

10

Charged with what, exactly?

Going shopping? Colour me confused.

11

I don’t get it - exactly what does he want these girls charged with? Being stupid? I think the dad needs to chill out and take responsibility for entrusting his kids to girls that probably weren’t the best choices.

And MissTake - do you mean that the girls went to the MoA with the kids, came home, got in trouble, and then the next day did it again, losing the kids?

Definite linkage needed.

12

I started babysitting around age 12. Of course I had completed a babysitting class and started out babysitting my younger brother. I also did my first jobs in tandem with a friend of the same age. This expanded into a regular babysitting business which I made a lot of money out of.

12 year olds do know what to do in emergencies as long as the parents are responsible enough to leave the proper information in a prominant place (ie the fridge, by the phone). That info includes 911, local police #s, where they are going to be that night, those numbers, numbers of neighbors, etc. It’s the parents’ responsibilty to make sure that the sitter is informed of these things and knows all important information like allergies and things. Of course the sitter should know to ask those questions too.

I don’t think it was the ages of the girls that was the problem. As SnoopyFan said, it’s the girls themselves. They were dumb. They did something without the parent’s permission- a HUGE baby-sitting no-no.

13

I also started babysitting at 12, with a Red Cross Babysitter’s certificate under my belt. My current favorite babysitter is nearly 18, but since she has a life, our next choice is a set of 13 and 14-yo sisters who nearly always come together. They have lots of emergency numbers, their parents are around the corner, and I’ve told them what to do.

14

So let me get this straight. Good Minister dude is foster parent to two teenagers who he uses as free babysitting. Then when foster child screws up ( which teenagers do, it is their job) he threatens her with putting her back with her family. Yah, those people the state thought were so bad they should take her away. So the next day he goes off leaving the slave labor to babysit again. So is anyone suprised she ran away?

I respect the courage most foster parents, and really wish I had it. Then I see the people that give the system a bad name. I can’t think of a charge off hand, but it seems to me there is a grown up in this situation that should face charges as an adult.

15

Hear hear… this guy hires kids, whom he doesn’t have to pay minimum wage; but when they screw up, he wants them held to adult standards. He can eat his cake, or he can hang onto it, but he can’t do both.

16

I was a mother’s helper at age eleven. By age 12, I was baby-sitting toddlers and older children, by 13, I was the main baby-sitter for all the children in the neighborhood - newborns and up. I used to pull in about $200 a week in the summer baby-sitting - not too shabby in 1987. I was an incredibly responsible pre-teen and teen, and I took my sitting jobs seriously.

I think these girls were just being typical teens, but they shouldn’t have been left in charge of those kids. There were previous circumstances that seemed to have been overlooked.

Ava

17

Are you serious? Shit, I was babysitting by 11, and kept it up until I went to college (and some in college, too). 13-year-olds can know just as much as adults about what to do in an emergency: it’s a matter of knowing who to call. Parents leave behind lists of phone numbers and instructions, and everything’s fine. I find it hard to believe that you actually think an adult could somehow magically repair an emergency situation where a teen can’t.

Here’s a link to the story of the kids’ return.

Here’s a link to the story about possible charges.

18

Not even close.

Here are some key parts of the story, in case either of those articles moves into being archived:

[quote]
He [the father] maintains he made the right decision to leave his children with the pair despite the fact the two were runaways and had taken refuge in his home for the weekend.

He described Benetta as “a spiritual daughter” whom he knew as the niece of a minister at El Bethel Baptist Church, the South Minneapolis church he attends.

Addison, who recently separated from his wife, said his family had counseled Benetta, who has run away before. He said she called him early Saturday from a motel and asked if she and her friend could come over. He said he allowed them to sleep in his daughters’ room.

Saturday morning the pair began cleaning the house and helping with the children, he said. The girls took the children to McDonald’s with his permission, but then took off to the Mall of America, returning about midnight with the children.

An angry Addison scolded the girls. He told them they would need to return to their families Sunday. He had notified Benetta’s grandparents, her primary guardians, of her whereabouts and told them she had taken off with the children.

On Sunday morning, the teens weren’t ready by the time Addison decided to go to the service. When he returned at 3 p.m., no one was home. By 9 p.m., he called 911 and explained to the dispatcher what had happened and told her he thought they might have gone back to the Mall of America. She told him to talk with Mall of America security.

When he didn’t hear from them early Monday, he called 911 again.

[quote]

The news stories airing about this before the children were found also made it clear that the father is in a bit of a bind when it comes to childcare. His wife of six years had a drug relapse they separated less than a month ago. He has been searching for appropriate care so that he can continue to work.

19

But I still don’t get what they’re going to be charged with?

Shopping without permission? This is a 12 and 13 year old - I’m not sure the pastors childcare woes are their fault. At all. Even remotely.

20

Furthermore, I wouldn’t leave an an 11 year old unsupervised, either, much less in charge of my kid! :eek: Don’t you people read the news? :confused:

Let me attempt to clarify: I would not leave my kid with anybody who can’t care for him *at least as well as I can. *This includes people who can’t drive/walk/use common sense/druggies/keep vicious animals/whatever. I wouldn’t leave him with anybody who could be fooled into allowing a stranger into the house (like, say a naive but well-meaning pre-teen or my doddering Father-in-Law), or couldn’t put up a good fight if someone tried.

Cars, motorcycles, money, equipment can all be replaced. My kid cannot, so I take a little extra caution.

Never kiss an animal that can lick its own butt.