Is that like a fortune-telling hooker?
Will she foretell your coming?
Did you hear about the midget fortune-teller who escaped from prison, and the news bulletins warned of a small medium at large?
Did you know that of all the men in the Longer family, the baby’s the tallest 'cause he’s just a little Longer?
But aren’t they all really just Daddy’s little squirt?
Are we talking about Prince George?
Who?
Didn’t you hear about the royal birth?
Which country?
Can we narrow down the field?
How 'bout center field?
Who’s on first?
Did you hear that Arthur Snodling and His Amazing Predatory Doves are on first, opening the bill, followed by the Amazing Rodriguez and His Death-defying Hamster of Doom, after which are the Amazing George and Grendel Mackintosh, who will sing their smash hit I Saw Her Under The Trolleycar, followed by the always Amazing Randy and his puppet Dull Bob, and then, to close out the show it’s the Simply Amazings, an acrobatic troupe of four desperate gymnasts from North Korea, who have to get the audience’s applause or they’ll be executed?
How in the hell have I not heard about that?!
Do you get fliers from the Amazing Rodeo Vaudeville circuit of lower East Schenectady?
So then, what’s on second?
Could it be that on the Second Channel, we have the madcap antics of Westfield and Ploo, a zany romantic comedy series about a peg-legged ninja and the mermaid performance artist he loves?
What, again?
You’d prefer “Until Next Morning”, a made-for-TV tearjerker about a dyslexic woman and the man she lvoes?
Are those my only choices?