Do you know which end is up with your eyes closed?
Well, you’re not planning on tying my hands behind my back, are you?
I’m sorry, did you prefer the front?
Where did you put the trapeze?
Didn’t you come with your own aerial apparatus?
That would hurt, wouldn’t it?
Could you then get radio stations to come in through our teeth fillings?
Are you wearing the proper foil hat?
How else do you figure the NSA’s not taken control of me?
No no, it’s the CIA that uses top-secret mind control, didn’t you get the memo?
Should someone ask you the same question?
Did you know, tin foil hats must be worn shiny-side out, or else they don’t work?
Could you speak a little louder into that potted plant on your left?
You mean the one my drunken roommate just urinated in?
Is that what that sound was?
How many beers did I drink!?
Can I use my toes to count on?
Did you know that men are superior to women because while they can count only on their fingers and toes, we can go up to 21?
Are you forgetting that women can count to 22?
But what if they’ve had a mastectomy?