A friend of mine asked me today to think of a question that I would consider too personal to answer. I’m sure there are billions of such questions, but I actually couldn’t think of one. Of course, my first thought was to wonder what Dopers would have to say. So, can you help me out with coming up with questions you would never consider answering?
Is your penis really less than 2 inches long?
In a job interview (real question from a brand-name company to all the female students in my class, no equivalent to the males): “what does your boyfriend think about you applying for this job?”
Until then, everybody in my class had been absolutely sure that sexism didn’t exist any more.
I think it depends who is asking.
I have been asked in a job interview ‘are you going to get married?’.
I have been asked by my pupils ‘how much do you earn?’.
A lot. I’m a private person. I don’t ask searching questions of others, so don’t do it to me. Family and friends are excepted, but generally wouldn’t ask anyway. Others are strictly on a need to know basis. I even argue with my employer over medical certificates, which I prefer to state, “Mr TheLoadedDog was unfit for duty yesterday because he was suffering from a medical condition”. Why should some pimply office girl upstairs know the details of some personal affliction?
Not enough privacy these days, in any event. I’m not ranting about the ubiquitous Orwellian security cameras everywhere, etc. I’m ranting about people with no clue of manners.
I refuse to answer personal questions which also provide possibly sensitive information about somebody else. For example, I will usually not answer spesific questions about my sex-life, since that doing it would also give information on my SO’s sex-life. I have no right to be handing out such information.
(Not that random people ask me about sex, mind you).
So, Phil, I see you have a nice new car, how much money do you make?
I wouldn’t like this question, as I believe people put too much emphasis on monetary wealth. So I wouldn’t answer.
A lot depends on context, of course. There are fairly innocuous questions which are inappropriate at job interviews, standing in line at the grocery store or asked by my mother which I won’t answer, or won’t answer fully.
On this board, I’m forthcoming to the point of TMI! I can only think of one question which has been asked of me outright on this board that I’ve specifically declined to answer. In what amounted to an “ask the polyamorous chick” thread, someone asked me if having an open marriage invited discord into my relationship with my husband. I don’t remember exactly how it was worded, but something akin to, “So what is the hardest challenge in your marriage, and is it because you’re poly?” I simply answered that our hardest challenges had nothing to do with our polyamory, but I declined to specify what they were as they were not related to the thread topic and I didn’t feel like sharing.
That’s not to say there wouldn’t be other questions I’d decline to answer, but like the OP, I’m having trouble thinking what they might be (aside from my credit card and social security numbers, of course.)
I have no problems with questions about money, but maybe that’s because I’m poor. I notice that people with more of it are more bothered by discussions of it.
Who did you vote for? I wouldn’t answer that because I am a strong believer in the importance of the secret ballot. Of course, I’m happy to talk politics, so people could probably make a good educated guess whom I voted for, and in practice, I sometimes volunteer it if is relevant to the conversation. It’s the principle of the thing. I don’t know if that counts as “too personal” – it’s not that the answer is particularly personal to me, it’s the belief that voting is fundamentally personal to each voter, not just me. (note: I’m in the US, where we have a long tradition of the secret ballot)
I also agree with Septima that I don’t like to answer personal questions that reveal things about other people, even indirectly.
It’s funny though - notwithstanding my earlier post, I have no problem with many of the traditional no-no questions. I value my vote seriously, so I won’t be ashamed to tell anybody how I voted. Ditto how old I am: pretentious old ladies hide their age. For me, there is no skill, merit, or shame in being any particular age, so that one doesn’t bother me. Monetary income I’m a bit funny on - not for me, but because the people who feel the need to ask are people I tend not to like.
But the acquaintance yesterday to me: “Are you still single? How do you deal with your sexual frustration?”
Ex-cuse fuckin’ ME???
Sex-life stuff mostly. A friend recently asked me if my boyfriend had seen me naked, which frankly is none of his business or anyone elses.
Other than that I’m a fairly open person.
IRL, money, politics, religion, I guess. I’ll tell my age though.
Around here, I avoid sexual threads and remain vague about certain family problems.
“Do you still beat your wife?”
I was taught by my first boss, many moons ago, NEVER to discuss pay w/ fellow employees (even if they’re your friends)…that’s not all I wouldn’t discuss, just the very first thing to come to mind.
Do you believe in (insert the deity of your choice)??
Before today, I would have said “what things have you stuck up your ass before?” but now I guess I have no shame.
“What questions would you refuse to answer?”, but only if I’m asked on some sort of online message board.
And the details of my evil, longterm plan for world domination. That’s right out.
Everything else is fair game.
I would never say my salary. I haven’t even told my parents. Unfortunately a co-worker called me in to help her with a tax paper and I found out how much she makes (or her gross income, anyway). I feel very uncomfortable knowing, not that I would ever say anything to anyone.
I’m comfortable saying how old I am and how much I weigh, but those are two that people might have problems with.
I take that back! I did say my salary here on the boards; somehow that is different 
Jeezum, I had a co-worker like that! “Oh, did you have sex over the weekend?” “Oh, you saw your old friend? Did you sit on his face?” :eek: :eek: We were pretty casual but that’s going a little too far. :smack:
Thanks for all the replies so far, everyone. Septima, I agree on the disclosing information about other people thing. TheLoadedDog, your post immediately put me in mind of Zoolander. I should watch that again to find some more of these questions…
But it looks like there’s another dimension to this now. I’d like to extend this (or narrow it down, as the case may be) to ask you to produce questions that would be too personal to answer coming from your SO.
I’m off to camp until Friday (yay!) so I won’t be able to access the SDMB till then, but I look forward to your responses.