But not have the time even to text for several days?
Pimpin’ ain’t easy.
I never realized until this was asked here, but I (woman) often ask what teams are playing, and you know what? I don’t care and have no interest! It’s just a social greeting, like, “how are you?” All it means is, “oh hi, I see you’re enjoying a spectator sport.”
That’s cool. But to look much less hopeless (:)), go with, “Hey guys, how’s your team doing?” It’s neutral, but still a nice social conversation starter.
Thanks, I guess 
You’re probably right, but it still sucks
Another question for girls:
Why does it seem like it is usually women who tell a completely surprised guy that their relationship isn’t working? Twice now I’ve been in long term relationships when she suddenly says “Ok this isn’t working for this or that reason, we have to break up”. WTF? Why didn’t you bring it up to me months ago?? Why didnt you try to work it out or talk to me? I’m not one of those typical cold and distant guys who don’t show any emotion, I would be willing to talk about any relationship problem you think we have. But it just came out of nowhere. Apparently she’s secretly resented something I said months ago, and another time my beliefs have always bothered her…for 3 fucking years.
That’s not been my experience. Usually, for me it’s been the guys who have not had the courage to bring up their concerns, so something that might have been an understanding destroys a relationship. (I had one guy do that to me and then try to be friends immediately. Sorry Charlie. My “friends” don’t treat me that way.)
I just think it’s a courage problem. A lack of experience problem. And an unwillingness to take charge of your own happiness problem.
I have said many times that if I have a problem you will know. If it seems like there’s something wrong and I’m NOT talking to you about it? That means I know it’s my shit and my responsibility to deal with and I’m trying to not involve you/punish you, but I do need some time to deal with my knee-jerk emotions.
You can’t read people’s minds. If there is a serious problem, you (the understood you) need to hash it out or accept it, or accept it after trying to hash it out.
Guy here - that’s also not been the case with me. How do you normally deal with conflict in a relationship (those two in particular)? Could it be that they don’t take your acceptance of their issues seriously? Or, given your previous questions - *too *seriously? Guys I’ve seen that fall into “the friend zone” seem way too eager to please, and dramatically overcompensate whenever the slightest issue arises to the point of smothering.
Try something less generic, like, “nice hit!” or “kick his fucking brains out!”
Arg, I didn’t realize this thread was already ten pages long when I started clicking multi-quote buttons, so my “reply” is much longer than I expected it would be. Sorry about that!
I’m probably even “more so” in this regard., and I’ve come to the conclusion that it’s the reason my school performance was just barely above average (high “C” average at HS graduation) despite having a well above-average IQ, and why I’m making less money as a career cook than I could be making in a “business setting”. Simple fact is that I have no patience for sitting around talking about shit (ala “meetings” and the like, or in a school setting, lectures and homework). I have to be doing shit. (And homework didn’t count as “doing”, because I define “doing” as “accomplishing something” or “working to reach a goal”, and once I understood the material, homework became nothing but pointless repetition for repetition’s sake.)
It’s actually interesting (and frustrating) to me the way this is divided along personality lines, and people’s career choices. I can multitask like a motherfuck — the ability to do so is an absolutely essential requirement of being a professional cook. In my current job (at a convention/banquet facility), though, I have to work a lot with the people in the sales department (the guys who sell and book the events). Their personalities fit their job, which is, essentially, a lot of talking. And one of them in particular is completely incapable of talking and keeping his hands working at the same time. I have to work alongside him when we’re dishing up a meal; we have only three cooks, and it takes more than that to form the “assembly line” for plating up the meals. There is a lot of conversation during the dishup process, and we cooks can all converse and keep the assembly line moving at the same time. This salesman, though, simply cannot talk and keep his hands going, mainly because he’s one of those who apparently doesn’t grasp the concept that people hear with their ears, not their eyes. So when he talks, he has to stop what he’s doing, and lean so that he can look directly at the person he’s addressing. And of course, this brings the assembly line to a halt every time he does it.
It’s a variation on the doctor joke that goes, “Doc, it hurts when I do this!” “Then don’t do that!” That, for better or worse, is how we look at “problems”. We see a problem and our first thought is how to eliminate the problem, not how to “understand” the problem. It’s like when I was a young boy and I would come home and complain about other kids picking on me. My dad’s response was to try to teach me to fight so that they’d knock it off, while my mom’s response was to tell me that the other kids were picking on me because they were “just jealous because you’re so smart”. Ultimately, though, neither response was helpful. I had neither the physical attributes nor the inclination to punch people, and my mother’s insistence that the other kids were “just jealous” did more damage in the long run, I think, in that it never occurred to me until much later in life that perhaps I was doing things to invite mistreatment
I can’t explain it, as I’m a compulsive drawer/cupboard closer. I have to be in my line of work - drawers and such left hanging open in a professional kitchen are a safety hazard (nothing like carrying a large pot of hot soup and having your apron get hung up on an protruding drawer, or carrying a handful of knives to the sink and tripping over an open, knee-high cupboard door). But my much-older roommate constantly leaves the kitchen drawers open, and it drives me absolutely nuts. He doesn’t leave them hanging all the way open; he’ll get something out of a drawer and then push it almost closed. So I come into the kitchen later, and there will be 4-5 drawers all sticking a few inches out.
Heh. I think I told this story once before: Years ago I cooked in a diner owned by a single mom. On weekends her 13-year-old daughter worked there, washing dishes. This daughter was knockout beautiful, and was physically developed (height, bust, hips, etc.) beyond her years. She was also an athlete, and so she moved much more confidently than your typical 13YO girl. One day she was putting some clean glasses away behind the lunch counter, and a non-regular male customer started chatting with her. I heard him ask for her phone number, and heard her ask him how old he was. He said, “I’m 28.” And she said, “Oh, I’m thirteen.” I swear I never saw somebody in such a hurry to pay his bill and get out of there 
Having been in the foodservice business for 26 years now, I can confirm that women make “special requests” far more often than men. And now that I’m in the convention/banquet business as opposed to the restaurant business, I’ve discovered that the meme still holds true. A group that is predominantly male will, for the most part, sit down when the meal is served and cheerfully eat whatever is put in front of them; special requests that come back are almost invariably from the women in the group. Meanwhile, a group that is overwhelmingly female will have a set, prearranged menu just like the male groups will have, but there’s always a big list of “special dietary requirements” attached.
I’m “near daily”. For a variety of reasons, mostly logistical, partly personal, I haven’t had sex with a partner since late 1995.
A lot of it is simply perception. How she looks can affect my approach and how it feels. Banging a super-skinny woman feels distinctly different from getting busy with a woman who has a nice, round booty. And yes, there really is a difference in feel from one vagina to the next.
The problem with men’s dress slacks is that they often create a “fake” bulge when you sit down in them. Dress slacks tend to be looser in “the area” than jeans, and the zipper is more flexible. So when you sit down the extra fabric and the zipper tends to fold up, creating a peak in the worst place. You’re not seeing my johnson tenting up my pants, you’re just seeing the fabric bunching up.
I’m thinking of the longstanding complaint about guys who want blowjobs, but won’t reciprocate. Here’s a thought: unless you’re taking it all the way down your throat, it’s possible to blow a guy without getting a mouth-/nose-full of pubic hair, especially if you’ve got a hand wrapped around his shaft. OTOH, because cunnilingus requires such close contact, it’s nearly impossible to go down on a woman without getting my nose very close to her mons. Unless she’s very neatly trimmed, that means I get pubic hair up my nostrils, which leads to tickling and sneezing.
This is why, ever since high school, I’ve never understood the mentality of guys who do a girl once and then dump her. I always took the position that if a girl was willing to do me once, odds were she’d probably be willing to do me again in the future, so hey, let’s keep this one around!
One problem, I think, is that women appear to be using the same term to mean different, mutually-exclusive things. Guys in middle school/high school ask a girl out and she says, “Let’s just be friends”, and then she never talks to you again, and may even go out of her way to avoid you in the future (meanwhile her girlfriends will smirk at you like, “What were you thinking?”). This teaches guys early on that when girls say “friends”, it’s their “nice” way of saying, “Oh, ick, get away from me!” So later, in adulthood, a woman might actually mean “friends” in the proper sense, but the guy still hears, “I don’t really even like you, why would I want to date you?”
I guess the problem is that men see the question as feigning interest, especially if they already know that you’re not particularly interested in sports. If you were an honest-to-goodness sports fan you would be familiar with the conventions (as we see it), so your question comes across as “just trying to make conversation” rather than “I’m really interested in who’s playing”.
I once read a humorous article about “Man Rules”, one of which was that it’s acceptable for a man to ask, “What’s the score?”, but completely unacceptable to ask, “Who’s playing?” Again, for the same reason. If a man is really a fan, he’ll already know who’s playing, and even if he somehow didn’t know, if he asks “What’s the score?”, the reply he gets will probably answer both questions, ala “Dallas is up 17-14, but Washington has the ball on the Cowboys’ 10.”
To be fair, even that’s not consistent across all networks/wire services/publications. Cities with two teams are sometimes abbreviated “CHA” and “CHN” (or NYA/NYN), with the A and N meaning “American League” and “National League”, respectively.
I think a lot of the former Soviet and Eastern Bloc countries must have a shortage (heh) of tall men. I was perusing one of those “Ukrainian bride” sites some time back, and was surprised at the number of women specifying that she wanted to meet a man who was taller than 5 '3".
GAH! Yes! This is something I’ve previously complained about here. When I’m bicycling on the local bike/pedestrian trail, and there’s a group of pedestrians approaching from the opposite direction, walking 3-4 abreast, the group of men will, 95% of the time, drop into single-file long enough for me to get past them, while the group of women will, 95% of the time not move at all, or if they do they’ll merely scrunch closer together while remaining side-by-side.
Ha, no, ladies get pants tents, too. I know the difference. If I didn’t, I think my male high school teachers would have come across as quite disturbing. Though there was one who loved to lift one leg up and rest his foot on a chair, jutting his hips and junk out a few inches from the faces of the students in the front row… (shudder)
Exactly the opposite of my question, which would be “When you are complaining to a man and he offers solutions, why do y’all then say something like ‘I’m not looking for help, I’m looking for support.’?” 
The reason why we do that… well, if you have a problem that’s important enough to actually speak about it, then you must be looking for solutions for why else talk about it? To complain? What good does that do? Might make you feel better, temporarily, but to no avail… the problem is still there.
Deal with it, fix it, and move on!
Also… Ladies, why don’t y’all band together and demand clothing sizing labels that actually mean something objective? A size “3”? What the hell is that? Why not your dresses be sized in something understandable… like inches, centimeters, or even angstroms?
(My theory: Women* don’t want to know objectively how big their butt/waist/hips/etc are, which is why y’all are satisfied with “sizes”. “After all this work I can fit into a size 5!” probably sounds better than “my diet shrank my ass so I can now fit in a pair of 32X35X28 jeans!”)
*Warning! Generalizations ahead! You read at your own peril and any offense taken is solely yours. Don’t come whining to me about it (unless you are looking for a specific course of action to solve this problem - please see my previous post).
That would still be no help. As I’ve recently been discovering while purchasing men’s pants for myself, the different clothing manufacturers seem to have wildly different opinions on what constitutes an “inch”.
I’ve got several pairs of pants, of different styles, labeled as having 34-inch waists. I’ve put on some weight recently, but I hadn’t really noticed because the 34-inch pants I wear most often, cargo pants from two different manufacturers, were still quite loose. I needed some new work pants, so I purchased a couple different pairs, again, both with 34-inch waists. Both pairs ended up being too tight. On one pair the button popped off the third time I fastened it; the other pair I can wear, but it gets uncomfortable after a while.
A couple weeks ago I went to a different store, one that specifically sells work clothes, and found a pair of black Dickies I liked. Getting a little smarter, I decided I had better try them on before I bought them. I took a pair, labeled 34 inches, to the fitting room, where I discovered I couldn’t get the button to within 2 inches of the buttonhole. Sigh. So I went back out and grabbed the next available size up, 36 inches. I also grabbed a second pair of pants, also Dickies, also 36 inches, but a different style and 5 dollars cheaper. Back in the dressing room I tried on the less expensive 36-inch pants, and could just barely get them buttoned. Then I tried on the other 36-inchers (again, from the same manufacturer), and they buttoned with ease.
Oh, and don’t then assume that a 36" belt is going to fit that 36" pair of slacks. It doesn’t work that way… :smack:
We had a thread on this not too long ago. The consensus was that women like nice guys just fine, but aren’t too crazy about Nice Guys ™.
I would be delighted to have clothing that came in rational sizes, but this is not a realistic goal. Women’s clothing usually doesn’t even offer a choice of sleeve or trouser leg lengths. It’s a wicked business.
As has already been pointed out, even when clothing size is based on inches/centimeters, it often isn’t accurate. It isn’t even possible for cheap, mass-produced clothing to be wholly consistent in terms of size. For instance, usual production method does not involve cutting out one piece of fabric at a time, instead multiple pieces of fabric are stacked up and cut by machine. The pieces near the top will be closest to the “true” size of the pattern, but error will creep in with the ones further down.
Hell, even in the one item of clothing almost all women buy - bras - band and cup size mean nothing. I personally have a handful of bras, all in the same band size, and there is a clear 2-3 inch difference between them.
With bras the elastic also gets stretched out over time, so an old but once accurate 34 can be more like a new 36.
I’ve heard that some ridiculous number of women (75% or more?) wear the wrong bra size, because figuring out bra sizing and whether the bra you’re wearing actually fits properly is so complicated. Something that feels okay during the few minutes you have it on in the store may turn out to be awful once you have to wear it all day.
Yes. In fact, there were a few times where I had “false starts”…that is, he would try to put it in, and I would be in so much pain I would make him pull out and abandon the whole thing. I’ve found that just relaxing was what finally got me going. Not to mention being with a partner that I trusted completely.
I agree completely.
I always ask “which team are we rooting for?” and he reply’s with the correct jersey color. There is peace.