Sorry, I assumed that was a question for men, for some reason. I certainly wouldn’t lose any esteem for her based on any of that, but I’d guess it’s the same reason some guys would lose esteem for my husband because he likes kitties and bakes, or if he was into, say, ballroom dancing. I don’t think her being outwardly feminine has anything to do with it, except that she is then in a position to *lose *these women’s esteem, while a more obviously “butch” woman might not ever have it to begin with.
This is why it doesn’t make sense to me. I cook, am into opera, and like kittens (who the hell doesn’t like kittens?), and I don’t lose respect from the guys for these. My biker friend (shaved head, tatooes, always wears a Harley shirt) makes the best cheesecake I know of, and only gains man points from it.
It may be just my social circles, but guys can be into anything, and more importantly, try anything and gain from it. Doesn’t mean I’m going to stop grunting at the football game, or forget how to change a tire. My wife lighting off fireworks or going shooting isn’t going to make her stop crying at chick flicks or forget how to sew.
Heart of Dorkness, you’re a chick? :eek:
In addition to what other guys have said:
Because there are quite a few women out there that when they say “Tell me what you’re feeling,” they really mean “Tell me something I want to hear.”
Not all women by any stretch. But there are quite a few. I have been unfortunate to date several of them. It was quite eye-opening when I realized this little game wasn’t SOP. . .
. . . in my thirties.
However, I do realize that I have had particularly bad luck in that regard. Most women I believe ARE actually interested in what’s going on. But if you have the bad luck to date the other kind early on it can really give you the wrong idea.
Depends on the month. If I’m horny, why not? If I’m not in the mood, I’m not in the mood.
Is he cute? Am I single and interested? If “yes” can be answered for a minimum of one of those, (1) would be fine. If “no” is the answer to the first one, it’s always (2). Sorry, I’m shallow and picky when it comes to the opposite sex, but I have a pretty wide range of what’s attractive to me.
Men: Why do you hit on me more openly when I’m dressed sloppily or partially in my male SO’s clothes? When I’m dressed nicely, I tend to get more of the “stunned” reaction than being hit on, and when I’m not dressed nicely or looking good (IMO), I get hit on openly by all variety of men. WTF?
Also, why is it that some men feel the need to hit on me or make inappropriate comments while I’m at work? Is it really that funny to walk by a woman who’s carrying a large load of stuff and ask “are you ticklish?” as if I’m going to go “yes; come tickle me so I drop all these DVDs and giggle like a mad person!”?
ETA: the beard thing-- I think that some men look great with facial hair, some men need it, and some men need to reprioritize their grooming habits so that “doing something with the facial hair” gets added in. Personally, well-groomed and attractive is great, but it varies from guy to guy as to what that means. For some, that means keeping some sort of facial hair-- it’s an added masculine touch that I find to be a handy bonus. For others, clean shaven looks better. Personally, I don’t understand the “ew, guys with facial hair are icky!” variety of female opinion. IT doesn’t make sense to me.
Last time I checked, yes.
Short answer: you’re not as intimidating.
Long answer: you do in fact look good when dressed ‘sloppily’. You look like someone a guy can imagine interacting socially with. And there are some guys who honestly find the jeans-and-a-T-shirt look way more attractive than being dressed up. (Similarly with flannel pyjamas versus lingerie.)
Well, given your choice of SO, that’s probably a good thing. 
Interesting. I never tried to sort out your gender but based on the name alone my guess would have gone male 100% of the time.
I’m a woman and dislike carrying a bag, but women’s clothes aren’t designed with pockets the way men’s clothes are. Women’s jackets and trousers often have NO pockets. Even if they look like they have pockets, it’s sometimes just a little pocket flap that’s there for show with no actual pocket at all. If there are actually pockets, they aren’t very big. Most of my trousers don’t have hip pockets big enough to hold even a small wallet, and I deliberately look for clothes with pockets.
On a normal day my handbag contains my wallet, cellphone, a paperback book, lip balm, eye drops, a Swiss army knife, a ballpoint pen or two, a comb, tissues, and sanitary napkins. But it’s big enough to also hold other things I might want to have with me on a particular day, like my camera or a small notebook.
I do none of these things. I don’t know any of my women friends who do this, either. But, I am not and do not hang with the most girliest of women.
And it is seen this way because it has been empirically observed that men don’t cry much. The biology is the origin.
This American Life talked fairly extensively to a F-M sex change man, and he said that his usual emotional release of a good cry got pointedly difficult. He had to be alone and concentrate.
HeyHomie’s list:
Tampons - It’s not the plastic that ooks me out, it’s having a wad of chemically treated, bodily-fluid-soaked cotton crammed up my vagina for any length of time. They’re not painful or uncomfortable, I just find the idea distasteful. I use them (very) occasionally, like when swimming, but otherwise I use reusable pads.
Pads - The huge, mattress-like ones you get out of vending machines do feel like diapers. The better, high-end ones are okay, but always feel kinda plasticky and crinkly and… clinical, to me. I use soft, terrycloth and flannel pads which I think are cozy-feeling.
Menstruation in General - Difficult to describe the feeling of a period starting. Occasionally I get cranky or crampy the day before, but more often than not I can feel something going on… it’s difficult to describe but I always imagine that it’s the feeling of my cervical os opening. It’s not a vaginal feeling and it’s not in my uterus, but something’s definitely happening in the lady region. That goes on for about a day, then I nearly always see a bit of discharge, then a smear of blood on the toilet paper.
Bowel Movements - I didn’t avoid it like the plague, but my guts run like clockwork and I almost never have to go after I leave the house in the morning. If I feel I may have to go in a public restroom, I’ll wait as long as possible so that it’s quick. I’m not embarrassed about pooping, I just don’t want to occupy the restroom.
Adolescence & Growth - Not really a “badge of honor” but we all talked about it and wondered when it was going to happen. No breast pain or itchiness.
On faking orgasms: positive feedback creates positive responses. I very rarely have an orgasm, but I always enjoy myself. If I don’t fake it, he gets sulky and depressed and then eventually just stops trying to please me at all. If he feels pleased with himself, he’s way more enthusiastic, responsive, and attentive and the sex is better for me. Whether or not I have an orgasm isn’t really his responsibility, but I can’t seem to make him understand that if I don’t have one, it’s not a personal failing on his part. It’s just easier on both of us if I fake it. I figure, as long as I’m faking it while he’s doing the right things, there’s no harm done. I don’t fake it if the sex is bad.
Do any of these dudes hope to receive routine blowjobs?
I like beards. NajaHusband wears a goatee and mustache, but I’m always trying to talk him into growing an elaborate set of mutton chops, or an awesome, waxable handlebar ‘stache, or just your basic beard. I am way jealous of you peoples’ facial accessorization options.
I don’t, but then I like things like knives and dogs and rabbit hunting so <shrug> it could just be a group of women who feel like they couldn’t relate to someone with disparate interests. I don’t have a lot of interest in the things society thinks someone with lady parts is supposed to be interested in, and don’t necessarily feel at ease around large groups of women… not because they’re women exactly, I just have fewer potential “small talk” options. I love to quilt and sew, but few sewing circles want to hear about my having spent the morning belly-crawling and hatcheting my way into a blackberry thicket and dragging my hawk out by the dead rat… or whatever. Mostly I just keep my mouth shut and enjoy listing in on the chit-chat. I enjoy the company of other women very much, but I don’t ever expect them to share my interests.
Because my main superpower is the ability to order the exact wrong thing off any menu. If we’re at an unfamiliar restaurant, your inclination is probably tastier than mine. If you and I are on a date and you might be paying, I’m finding out what the price range is. Mostly though, it’s just to compare food interest notes.
For dudes:
On masturbation frequency: do you “daily” dudes have consistent sex lives, too? Does the frequency change when you’re having partner sex? If you rub one out, how long until you’re ready for (or interested in) partner sex?
Hear, hear. Or old pair of beat up Converse’s vs. designer stiletto heels, shaggy bed hair vs. haute coiffure masterpiece and natural you vs. neon pink lips + peacock blue eyelids + painted eyebrows. You get the idea.
Yeah, he’s totally hot. 
Okay, so the consensus is that I’m fulfilling a male desire in one guy or another at any given time regardless of what I’m wearing, but it may hit a different demographic set depending upon what I’m wearing or how I’m looking. Good to know!
My older brother is still horrified at the idea that I have sex. We’re 10 years apart, and I’m 26. Is this ever going to change? I’m tired of the concept of him having sex with his wife being normal and the idea of me possibly being sexually active, even in a monogamous relationship being met with “OMG, that’s so weird!”
Because we want to go to sleep now, please, and without having to watch you pout for the next three days.
Guys, why do you always think sex will feel different with a woman who looks this way or that way? Is one vagina really so different from another? Does the difference correlate in some way to appearance?
Not really. It could be hours of horniness, or days of the occasional thought. Although there’s a lot of triggers that make guys thinking about sex.
So on average maybe every ten minutes, but not as a rule.
I have obviously not been any other guys.
Speaking for myself: when I’m attracted to you on the basis of how you look, there is nothing anywhere near as rational and coherent as “Gee I wonder what sex with her would be like?” taking place. The experience of seeing you is, in and of itself, erotic. I don’t mean “has some hints of the actual erotic attached to it”, I mean as an erotic experience as strong as anything you could make me experience by touching any part of my body in any fashion (including repetitive motions and slippery or soft textures or any combo you can conceive of).
It is and has always been damn disconcerting, since it has very little to do with who you are as a person & all that.
? Why would you get into a fight and not do your best to win it?
I will do any technique I can to win. If that means gouging eyes and using the nostrils as a come-along, I bloody well will. Steel toed shoes are wonderful in a fight. Properly placed kick will drop someone on the ground in a flash with a broken or dislocated kneecap.
It isn’t a fight in a boxing ring, there are no rules other than win the fight.
[yes, i used to be a scrapper when I was younger.]
As to the why not separate - much of the time guys are such posers… they don’t actually want to fight. I have found that I will do my best to avoid a fight, but once I can not avoid it, I win it as quickly as possible. If that means fighting ‘dirty’ by your rules, then that is what it takes.
Well, I carried a bag when I went to my various pre-op appointments, the anesthetologist required me to bring all my damned meds with me, even though I have a lovely little printout of everything I take, specific med, dosage and schedule…and i can reel off all my meds anyway.
I normally have my moto 9m cellphone in my left pocket [phone, ebooks] and my key fob[includes single house key and a pill bottle with a dose of indocin and 3 doses of colchicine] and card case [drivers license, military id, debit card, $20 bill] and occasionally I will stuff in a granola bar if I am going somewhere and I need a snack along.