They’ve been bothering me lately, partly because I apparently checked the wrong box on a scholarship search website, telling them to contact me. That is very much not what I wanted to do, primarily because they have NOT been leaving me alone.
So, if a recruiter calls (again, as I bet they will), and I tell them I’m a lesbian, will they stop?
Just tell them that you joined one of the other services. They will take you off the list… usually.
NinjaChick your idea will work in theory =)
Tell them your a lesbian with a speed addiction.
…sorry, you’re
I told them my father was a multi-millionaire and that I needed the GI Bill like a hole in the head. They stopped. If they had called back I would have told them I was severly epileptic or on anti-psychotics for some serious mental illness. If they lie why can’t I.
Just join one of the services, that will eventually get the others off your back.
yvan eht nioj
Heh. Loving the Simpsons reference.
Would telling them that I’m planning on joining the military, the al-queda branch be a bad idea maybe? Too extreme?
Try selling them some windows or sending them a copy of “The Watchtower”.
TitoBenito: They’re not allowed to lie.
My brother’s recruiter (Air Force) would leave you alone if you said, “No thanks.” He’s a pretty cool guy. And honest.
But after my brother graduated from high school, and did NOT do anything to get in touch with the guy, a Marine recruiter was after him for about a year. Even being told that he was away at college in an honors program didn’t get rid of him. I don’t think anything that any of us said would have. I think the only thing that did was the recruiter getting transferred away. The local Marine recruiting office shares space with the Air Force, and my brother’s recruiter knew the guy in question and I don’t think he liked him much. Not that he actually came out and said it.
My brother would make the world’s worst Marine. But he’ll make a kickass computer geek for the Air Force. 
God, military recruiters are relentless. I went through a period of despair during which I was so sure that I wouldn’t get into my college of choice that I sent away for an Army brochure. A few days later, I got my acceptance letter, but then the damn recruiter called me and had the gall to tell me that I could learn lots of more valuable things in the army than I would in college and I’d get paid! “Sgt. Hall” would not take a hint and kept calling me about twice a week for about a month. At one point I guess he wanted to sound cool and started saying things like “Yo, man” and “Watchoo need college for, G?” (I don’t know why because I’ve never spoken like that). Finally one day I put on a fake voice, told him my name was Mike and said the guy he was calling for was my roommate and he moved to another state. He called once more and that was it. Thank God.
Years later, I waited tables at a restaurant and an Air Force recuiter used to come in all the time pitching to the teenagers that worked there while he ate. He didn’t bother me at all, though. I suppose that at age 23 he considered me over the hill for the Air Force! During that same period I was walking home with groceries one day because I didn’t have a car at the time and a man in an Army uniform stopped his car and offered me a ride. I accepted since I figured it was safe and we started talking recruiters. He told me that a few weeks earlier he would’ve been trying to recruit me the whole ride home, but this was his last day as a recruiter because he’d gotten another position with the Army, then went on to explain how competitive a field recruiting is and how the recruiters are under enormous pressure to sign up a lot of people. I asked him if they ever considered that by pressuring teenagers like that they’re getting a lot of kids who aren’t military material, but he said “No, that’s what bootcamp is for”. It just gives me the creeps.