Red Flags in online personal ads.

From my year or so of online dating. Feel free to add your own.

  1. Long distance pictures and no close, full body shots.

  2. Glamour shots.

  3. Women who start off by saying, “Gee, I don’t know what to say here.”

  4. No photos and a refusal to send any before meeting.

  5. “I don’t have a digital camera/ my scanner is broken etc…”

  6. 4 kids from 4 guys.

  7. “Seperated”

  8. “Go to this website to see my REAL pictures”

(FYI I’m happily married to an online date now)

I often check out the “women seeking men” ads in Metropolis, a Tokyo-area English-language free paper.

Danger signs that pop up very frequently:

“looking for successful executive” (a few go straight for “wealthy businessman”)
“treat me like a princess”
“take me shopping and traveling”

Not too long ago I came across one that pretty bluntly said “buy me expensive stuff and I’ll have sex with you.”

Granted the “men seeking women” ads are pretty laughable as well.

I saw one once that was woman seeking man.

She wrote: “I enjoy long walks on the beach, al fresco bathing, and revenge fantasies.”

It was scary, yet wierdly intriguing…

Yes- bad spelling is a huge warning sign to me, also.

And anything involving the words and phrases “open-minded”, “friends with benefits”, and “court-ordered”.

There was one guy who emailed me a while back.

Happily married and loved fathering children. Wanted to find more women to make babies with.

And . . . somehow my profile convinced him I was looking for that?

Looking for someone who does not live within 100 yards of a school or playground.

Any man who says that he is a “nice guy” in his ad. IME men who talk about the fact that they are such nice guys are actually assholes trying to convince you otherwise. Also men who say negative things about their exes in their ads are men that I won’t respond to no matter how well we match up otherwise.