I used to work with a woman who described herself as “a luscious, leggy mid-20s redhead” and frequently told people about her modelling career. People were very surprised when they met her because she was a short, mid-40s wizened old crow who perfectly suited her nickname of “Gollum”.
Since then, the word ‘redhead’ makes me shudder.
Tylenol doesn’t put me to sleep either and I seem to have a greater pain tolerance than most…as well, temperature based things bother me as well. Demerol doesn’t do much either. They gave it to me twice before surgeries and waited and waited. Finally, I talked them into going ahead with the anasthetic because nothing else was going to happen.
Funny, though, not too many doctors seem to realize that we handle things a little differently.
Interestingly, I dated a red head all through high school. In our case, two redheads did not a good relationship make!
Damnit, I wanted a thread with violence, and craziness, and sex. All these damn redheads came in here and tried to make a happy rational thread out of it. Fine, I’ll be a little more forthcoming, hopefully it’ll bring out better stories.
I dated this redhead for about 18 months. The nice dark auburn red, a very good looking guy. I was 18, he was ten years older. Articulate, smart, well bred. Well to do. Son of the dean of a prestigious college. Crazy as a shithouse rat, with a couple of nice addictions to go with it.
So, a Friday night, I’m doing something, he’s somewhere else, doing something, can’t remember the excuse. About ten o’clock, I get a phone call from a mutual friend, telling me he is holed up in some sleazy motel with the girlfriend of a business associate, who is a mutual acquaintance of ours. I go to the motel. I knock on the door. The albino girlfriend is there, but denies everything. (Yeah, she was scary looking, especially after that meth habit kicked in.) I check the hotel room, the bathroom, the balcony, no boyfriend. But she has GUILTY written in big red letters on her forehead. I leave, come back within minutes, she let’s me in, swears she wouldn’t do anything like that, she’s my friend, really, talks to me for a bit. She’s still acting really nervous and jumpy, eying the balcony every once in a while. I decide to look out there again. I see nothing, until I look down.
He is hanging off the edge of the balcony. About 5 stories up.
I see him, he sees me, game is up.
Comes back in the room, says, “Oh no, not screwing her. Ok, maybe I’m screwing her. Yeah, I’m screwing her. Oh, and can you give her a ride home? Her car broke down.”
I said, quote, “She’s your piece of ass, you take her home,@#%&(@#(%!)^(%) %(&@#)!@)^#^&^%@(!@#)!)#^@#(%#)&&)!!!%(#^$” Unquote.
He asks again. I punch him in the nuts. This is a very effective ploy for about 3 minutes. After my three minute window of watching him in agony, he proceeds to beat the shit out of me. The cops are called. He goes to jail. He calls me from jail, looking for bail money. I try to calmly explain that the reason he is IN JAIL, is because he beat the shit out of me, and he could probably think of someone better to call. He says, “But it’s just a loan.” I hang up.
I keep hanging up.
6 months later I run into him, he’s fallen farther down the rabbit hole. Tries to blame me for the ruination of his life, his shooting meth, going to jail over some altercation with a prostitute, and a nice case of chlamydia on his tongue. Um, nope, have nothing to do with any of those things, sorry, have a nice day, you fucking lunatic.
I swore off dating for 2 years, and redheads forever.
When he heard about the next guy I was dating, (two years later,)he lost it, showed up at my house, went ballistic, asked how could I possibly do this to him. (I had no contact with him in the interim, moved about 30 miles away.) Tried to choke me. That was a little fucking scary.
He didn’t crash my wedding a couple of years after that, but he was in prison, he had a good excuse.
He called my best friend for years until she finally changed her phone number. “She’s married. She has kids, move on.” “But I just want to talk to her, get closure.” Yeah, closure. Maybe he was looking for bail money.
He ever shows up at the doorstep, I’ve got a debt to settle. Instead of watching him in agony for three minutes, I’m getting the baseball bat while I still have a chance.
I had a crazy fling with a redhead back in the mid '90s.
I had about 2 weeks left to serve in the Navy and was grilling hamburgers at a friend’s house on Buckroe Beach on the Virginia coast. I was drinking a beer and eating a burger when a car pulled up with 2 very good looking women in it. They asked if I knew where the apartment for rent was, and I said I’m afraid I don’t. I asked if they would like a hamburger and the redheaded one (Julie) said " No, I’m a vegetarian" I threw my hamburger over my shoulder and said “Yeah me too!”, which made her laugh.
It turned out that they were dancers at a Go-Go bar in Newport News, and they invited me to stop by the bar that night, and I quite rapidly agreed. I showed up late with a buddy of mine and Julie I went for a drive to the beach after closing time and had a couple drinks at her apartment.
I saw her again the next night and then we were dating.
So 2 weeks later it was time for me to leave VA and head back home to WI, and she decided to come back with me. So that summer I collected unemployment and lived with her in a big old rental house, along with 3 other students at the college. It was crazy, crazy, crazy summer. She ended up moving back home to Virginia in July, I believe it was.
dahfisheroo, that has to be one of the scariest stories I’ve heard recently. I hope he’s finally left you alone!
Well, I can’t tell you what dating a redhead is like: you’d have to ask Alistair McCello about that. 
In actuality, although my natural hair does qualify as “reddish”, it’s really a mix of red, gold and brown–something my dad was extremely disappointed about. He had intensely red hair (before it turned silver :P) and was dismayed when he discovered his daughter didn’t inherit the trait. I routinely dye my hair brighter red colors though, and when I had the most recent dying job done, he commented, “Now, see? That’s what you were supposed to look like!”
I’ve been playing nudgy winky with a bright orange temptress at work for some time now. Every time I see her, the flirts get a little more obvious. I thnk that the next time I see her, I’m going to ask her out.
What sort of sex should I be expecting? Would it be safe and boring, or should I just go ahead and get myself a good lawyer?
Speaking only from personal memory, you’ll not have 2 sticks of furniture together and not a scorched stone will be standing atop one another of your fine house.
Aaaahhh… happy times.
So…
It was good, then?
yeah, watch out for your coffee table, and you might want to wear earplugs.
What is the difference between having sex with a blond and a redhead?
Afterwards the blond lets you get up.
The redhead unties you.
I brake for Asian women, and back up six blocks for redheads. 
I’ve only got one. But what a one she was…
I think I’ve mentioned her before. J was a friend of mine. She and I lived together for a bit before moving in with another friend of ours (after which things went to hell, but I digress).
At any rate, J was the only redhead I’d ever been with. She was… wild. I would almost classify her as a nymphomaniac, except she had self-control. But if it had to do with sex, she was interested. Man those were good times.
Probably the most, er, entertaining event with J was before she and I actually knew each other well. It was a couples camping event; me and my current GF, J and her current toy – I mean, boyfriend. We piled everything into my van and headed out to pick up J’s date. Who wasn’t home, or at the bar where he hung out, or anywhere else we could find. This was in the pre-cell-phone era, so finding people was a bit harder.
To top off the evening, Becky got word that her brother had just been in a fight and was in jail. Lovely. It looked like the camping trip was a bust. We ended up sitting in the parking lot where we’d met to launch the trip, discussing how shitty the evening was turning out to be.
J and Becky (my GF) were good friends. I didn’t know HOW good, though. J was really pissed that her date was AWOL and really wanted to go camping. Becky wanted to get back to her house to slap some sense into her brother (her words). I was bored as hell and just wanted to go somewhere and do something.
The girls are in the back of the van discussing what we’re going to do, while I’m up front dozing. I suddenly snap to alertness when I hear J say, “Well, you head on back and deal with your bro, I’ll take Sofa for the night and we’ll have some fun, ok?”
You can imagine how wide-eyed I was at this point. Um, what? Wait… what? Does this mean… wait… what does this mean? Um… huh?
Becky, bless her soul, says, “Okay. But be careful, he bruises easy.” Then she comes up front, gives me a quick kiss, says “Have fun honey,” and leaves.
J comes up front, gives me one of those looks that only a redhead can manage, and says “So, you think you can handle me?”
No, but I was damn well going to give it my best shot!
Ahh… good times. We ended up sleeping in the van, because the tent poles got broken… my sleeping bag, up until then pristine, came back covered with soot and with a large hole melted through, where we’d rolled into the fire (oops). I had a dislocated pinky, but damn if I didn’t notice until the next day. J, wherever you are… I miss ya, babe.
I think I have a large enough sample size that this doesn’t count as anecdotal. (A nice, short summary of my post-puberty sex life, ~25 years worth: 1) I have never dated a blonde. 2) I have never had sex with a brunette. 3) I have never dated a redhead I did not have sex with. Draw your own conclusions from that.)
Well over 50% chance that she will have an insatiable sexual appetite. Eat plenty of carbs beforehand & keep well hydrated.
Low but significant probability of extreme kinkiness. Hide a handcuff key somewhere where she won’t find it, just in case. Hint: ‘in your ass’ is not a good choice in that regard.
Good luck, and may God have mercy on your soul.
the doctor says the bandages can come off in a year.
Yee haw! I’m going for it!
It was nice knowing you all. Scatter my ashes at sea.
Every time I see a hot redhead, I wonder if the carpet matches the drapes. From what you’re all describing, it sounds like in many cases there is no carpet.
Blondes are as dumb as they look.
Brunettes are not as smart as they pretend to be.
Redheads obsess way too much over their haircolor.
I’ve never dated a redhead but I’ve always wanted to. Redheads are hawt! Even the daywalkers!
When I originally asked my first question, I jokingly asked if I should just get a lawyer. Now I’m thinking maybe I should get a doctor. And it occurs to me that I have no idea what this woman does for a living, but there is a strong chance that she is a doctor. The possiblities for kinkiness have just increased geometrically.
From my experiences when I was single, men obsessed much more over my haircolor that I did.
I agree. The “does the carpet match the drapes” thing counts as an obsession, right?