Redheads

Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share
1

How do you get a redhead to argue with you?
Say something.

How do you get a redhead’s mood to change?
Wait 10 seconds.

If you love a Redhead, set her free … if she follows you everywhere you go, pitches a tent in your front lawn and puts your new girl-friend in the hospital— she’s yours.

What’s safer: a redhead or a piranha?
The piranha. They only attack in schools.

How do you know a guy at the beach has a redhead for a girlfriend?
She has scratched “stay off MY TURF!” on his back with her nails.

What do you call a Redhead with an attitude?
Normal.

What does a redhead, an anniversary, and a toilet have in common?
Men always miss them.

What do you call a woman who knows where her husband is every night?
A redhead!

How do you know when your redhead has forgiven you?
She stops washing your clothes in the toilet bowl.

How do you know when a redhead has been using a computer?
There’s a hammer embedded in the monitor.

Only two things are necessary to keep a redhead happy. One is to let her think she is having her own way and the other is to let her have it.

2

Ahem

I’m the luckiest woman in the world!
Click here to find out why.

3

(With apologies to Shayna and redheads the world over.)

:smiley:

4

I don’t get it, I thought they were really funny, but when I sent them to my wife (a redhead), she just growled.

5

The truth hurts, soul… that’s why… :smiley:

6

FREAKY!!!

I replaced the word “redhead” in every joke with my girlfriend’s name, and it was just as funny every time!

and so on.
The really scary thing is that she agreed…Yikes.

7

sheesh…I was doing the same for Mrs X and Persephone :smiley:

8

Hehe.

As a confirmed redhead, Weirddave I want you to get your butt over here & tell me that to my face. Dare ya. :smiley:

I especially agree with #1 & #6.

9

As a woman whose best friends call her The Diva and who is a green eyed redhead…

Yes it’s true-and what are you going to do about it?

The sig says it all…

10

Y’know, all you “supposed” redheads really need to back up your claims by posting pics for us to determine if you’re really a redhead or not. :slight_smile:

11

<<<<raises eyebrow and looks at Monfort>>>>>

And exactly why should I have to prove anything to you?

<<<tosses dark red hair as she turns away>>>

12

HEY!

13

Well, that earned you a smack next time I see you, Dave…

14

What’s the mating call of a blonde?
I’m soooo drunk!

What’s the mating call of a brunette?
Is that blonde bitch gone yet?

What’s the mating call of a redhead?
NEXT!
(told to me by a true redhead)
:slight_smile:

15

Like my ex-fiancee used to say…

You can sleep with a blond.

You can can sleep with a brunette.

However… you’ll NEVER get any sleep with a redhead.

16

[[What do you call a Redhead with an attitude?
Normal.]]

I resemble that remark.

  • Jill
17

Woo Hoo!!! You tell 'em, girl!

I’m the luckiest woman in the world!
Click here to find out why.

18

How do you know when a redhead is done having sex with you?

She unties you.

19

To quote (as best as he can remember) The Boss:

“Man, I don’t care how many girls you dated
You ain’t lived till you’ve had your tires rotated
By a red-headed woman.”

I survived a six-year marriage to a redhead, though the broken fifth vertabrae still acts up on occasion.

Isaac Asimov once described Virginia Heinlein, RAH’s wife, as a “Rock-Ribbed, Right-Wing Republican Redhead.”

Done rambling. Let the jokes continue.

Sir

20

HEY!

(Did I already say that?)