Yeah, I know. There’s already another pet thread. But I don’t really think swapping stories about deaths tends to help me with grief. I just get more sad thinking about everyone else.
I didn’t immediately cry like I did when Mom died. I felt sad, but also relief. He’s not been in a good way for a little while. I was starting to look into putting him down after he’d stopped eating. I do feel a bit bad I was asleep when he passed, so I couldn’t still be comforting him, but I had been comforting him and even helping him get to sleep (with petting and calm voices)before that, and I hope he passed without waking back up.
I was at first just doing my thing and looking up the best ways to grieve, still not feeling too bad. But now it’s starting to hit pretty hard, and I feel pretty bad. It’s a different feeling, but I also have been having some mental health stuff I’ve not mentioned, so I don’t know how that’s factored in.
I do start to get somewhat worried. You see, our landlord decided he wanted to sell our house, and only gave us a little over a month to get out. And I’ve still got a lot of work to do to get moved out, and finding a new place isn’t easy. I’m quite busy, in other words. I had prayed that Reese would at least last long enough for us to be done with moving.
It really did seem like it wasn’t going to hit very hard. And I can’t say I feel like crying exactly. It’s a weird feeling.
I don’t as of yet feel much like memorializing him. I don’t really feel like I know what to say about him. I mean, he was a good doggy, and I love him very much. He would shove his head into my hand to say he wanted to be petted, and would sometimes deliberately seek me out. He was a comfort when I would feel bad or sick. The way he would respond to people food was often funny. He cuddled very nicely. The way he raised his tail when he peed was kinda funny, too.
I’m not entirely sure what I want from this thread, to be honest. Encouragement seems nice. But not sad stuff. This is the first pet I’ve ever had that I was this attached to. And this is the first time we’ve been without a pet in quite a long time.
Anyways, thank you for taking the time to read this.