Relay Novel: Fuck off APB9999

Hey, Nut Sack Sweat Bead!

It was a bad idea! The first, second and third times you tried, slug scab!

It was still a bad idea the fourth and fifth times, donkey dung maggot!

Try “I’m a doofus! Everybody pile on!” next time. You’ll get better responses, dickweed.

Brithael bites.


Ummmm… What???

One of many lame attempts by Scrote-boy


That’s my “virtual boyfriend’s” lame idea you’re dogpiling!

Well, get 'im whipped and under control, sweetie!

I didn’t have the guts to speak up, because I’m new and still sorting out the who’s who, what’s what.

ChiefScott is now my favorite poster.


Though you are new, you do understand that if you are female and have posted that I’m your favorite poster, you are required by law to give me a virtual blow job?

If you’re male, ignore the above. Your girlfriend/wife/SO owes me a real blow job.

Pay up.

Sheesh, people, lighten up. :rolleyes: It’s no worse than Bricker’s One Minute Mysteries, or any other “join the club” thread–Hags of the Straight Dope, Got a Tattoo? Get In Here!, the SDMB Awards, Get Your Straight Dope Title From Fairy Princess Kitty Here!, Crunchy Frog’s Welcome Wagon, etc. As a matter of fact, now that I think about it, it’s exactly the same as all of these.

So, what’s your problem? Just jealous? :wink:

And the one where Swiddles gave everybody sainthoods, and the Men of the Straight Dope, and wasn’t there a Straight Dope Soap Opera…?

is worthy, IMHO.

And Chief?

I’m looking back and forth here and I’m thinking you would add a great chapter, if you were so inclined, and I don’t mean “So I shot her, and everybody else and then ate the barrel myself.
So now everybody shut the fuck up…”

Oh, c’mon, inor, that was literary genius!

Chief, you seem a bit grumby lately, mayhap a bj is exactly what you need. You heading anywhere near Thailand any time soon?

APB is a genius! He offered this thread months ago in anticipation of ChiefScott’s whining.

Simmer down, Chief.

… unless, of course, you want APB to make you his bitch.

Don’t Forget the Straight Dope Kingdom, with King Jester.

Chiefie’s just got a lot of pent-up frustration, 'cuz on the outside he pretends to hate smilies, but on the inside, he loves 'em…

Just let him vent. It’s healthy.

(Goin’ for #1 on Scott’s shitlist…)

Jeez, Chief, they were meant to be amusing, and they weren’t specifically aimed at amusing you. If you don’t like 'em, don’t read 'em. I titled them all in the same pattern, so you have no one to blame but yourself if you kept reading after the first one.

BTW, what the hell is “Brithael”?

APB9999 –

Actually what set me off was I logged on, and there on the front page was 4 or five of those story thingies.
I mean, maybe one at a time they’d have been palatable, but shooting out one right after the other… mystery, romance, western, etc.

Plus it had been done several time 'afore.

BTW, Brithael was a troll who I hounded into submission and eventual retreat from the boards. He evoked the best of my Pit persona. Ergo, I end all my pit rants with…

Brithael blows

(or some varient)

Kinda like the “Ask the so-and-so” craze all those months back.

I remember those days… “Ask the bum”, “Ask the altoid addict”, “Ask Norm MacDonald”…

Brithael. There’s some bad memories.

Well, thank you very much UNCLE BEER. Now you can just get up here and rock me to sleep tonight.

Brithael . . . :: shudder ::

Clairmont, just remember that Chief :slight_smile: Scott LOVES smilies! :wink: :smiley: