Saying it wrong on porpoise

I hate it when people cast nastursiums in my direction! Snausages are also a particular favourite for my nephew for dinner!

College cheese, anyone?

I definitely enjoy froggy days. On occasion, they make me very hoppy.

The ironing is delicious.

Insults hurt my feelers. :frowning:

My mom always said idear, and queuepon.

I have no idear why.

I was told I said busgetti and hangaber when I was much smaller.

Those are dialect pronunciations, perhaps “vulgar” in some ears but not mistakes. I’m pretty sure she didn’t write “idear.”

You can find a whole list of these out on the Interwebs.

Yeah, those toddler hangovers are the worst! Actually, I don’t know what “hangaber” was supposed to be but I’m pretty sure it’s not hangover.

Some people around these here parts, pronounce Detroit as “Day-Twah!”. Iddn’t it cute?

You Merkins speak a funny language.

I’m pretty sure it means 'amburgier

A couple of my favorites, courtesy of Homer Simpson: tramampoline and saxomophone.

I don’t know if this counts, but I think hyperbowl sounds better than hyperbole.

I mentally translate “reason for being” as “earth grape.” (You know, from the French phrase: raisin de terre.)

We have the best word ever - cannonball. It means cantaloupe, at least in our family, but at the same time, it is hilarious when Little Small is in a restaurant and asks for cannonball.

Plus, I’m a jerk, and I switch sounds in words on purpose all the time, such as saying “paftey satrol” instead of safety patrol, or within a word, such as Roclox instead of Clorox. Drives my wife bonkers, it does.

Brendon Small

That reminds me: human beans.

Impork.
Expork.

Chiweewee. More fugly than a humourraid, and not much bigger than a cucaracha. If you want a real dog, get a Dalmanatian.

‘Damnation’.

Speaking of animals, I can’t help but comment whenever I see one of those cha-hoo-wa-hoo-wa dogs like from the Taco Bell commercials.

Also, for the locals, whenever I see signs for Port Huaneme, it comes out as “HWHEY-nuh-may.”

I know. You got the chiweewee.

Chi-hoowa-hoowa. I think Chai-Chai Rod-re-gweez had one.

I thought of this in another thread: I call woodpeckers ‘pudknockers’.