SDMB Self Esteem

During the eight months that I have been priviledged to be a part of this community, there have been numerous times when I have been stunned to see that a poster who I value as a strong, together, WONDERFUL person appears to have self esteem issues. Why this should surprise me I don’t know, since I have plenty of my own.

However, I just had a thought…maybe we should have a thread where we all try to HELP each other understand how much value we all place on each other? I know that most of us only REALLY know a handful of people on the board, but there are times when I think to myself "Boy, I really think that was a wise/intelligent/loving/giving/down to earth/AWESOME thing to say! I should respond, but I don’t really KNOW that person, and I don’t want to jump in and look like an idiot. (Hey, I ADMITTED that I have self esteem issues, okay?)

So, this may sink like a stone. But, with all of the stuff that has been going on lately here, I wanted to provide a forum where we could say something about someone who has touched your life just by being themselves.

In MY case, there are so many people who have helped me, supported me, cared about me and been kind to me that I could not even begin to post a list.

I actually have a list somewhere in my heart, but I hope that I have let each of them know in private how much they have helped me, and how much I appreciate them. If I missed anyone in private, please know that I DO appreciate any kind or loving and supportive thing anyone ever said to me on this board.

So, does anyone else feel the need to tell anyone else how much they have meant to them?


I’m not usually into these sort of threads because a) there aren’t very many people here that I don’t appreciate for one reason or another and b) I’m really bad at remembering who said what. I’ll give it a shot anyway.
I don’t know if any of these people have self-esteem issues, but

I appreciate…
Jodi - for her fairness and logic. She says things the way I wish I could say them.
OpalCat - for her kindness. She often seems to be the voice of reason.
magdalene and Alphagene - because their style of humor makes me laugh until my cheeks hurt.

I’ve only been here a short time so my list if small.

Shayna: You have become a wonderful friend in a very short time. I think you are a remarkable woman; intelligent, loving, warm, generous and thoughtful, though I sure wouldn’t want to piss you off :wink:

Dire Wolf: You know exactly why I have included you on this list. Thank you for being a part of my life.

I’d like to thank everyone who offered sympathy and advice to me in the “Both my cats are in the vet hospital” thread. I’m not very good at posting to those kinds of “I need sympathy!” threads, but know firsthand how much it means when you’re the one looking for sympathy. You all are great…

The list is too long and people would look at me funny if I started crying in a (semi)public computer lab, so to summarize:

Falcon, for just being way cool in every conceivable way. Also the first and last doper to hug me.

ssskuggiii, andygirl and ad noctum for things I can’t explain on here.

purplebear for introducing me to her daughter and trusting me not to corrupt her (which her I mean there is anyone’s guess:)).

Everyone who was nice to me when I first got here.

There are almost too many names to mention. Almost. I find myself thinking about the brave, wise, compassionate, and incredibly strong women I find here; the ones who make me wish I knew them in person, the ones who make me realize that there is a place for a woman with wit and intelligence (and that it’s a good place), the ones who make me think “I want to be like that”.

Ayesha - you are my patron goddess, you know. I read how much crap has come down in your life, and you have the strength not just to stand up to it, but you also open your arms and shelter with love all those who matter to you. You are a powerful woman. We need more just like you.

Falcon - when I get in my self-pitying, “oh, woe is me” mood, I remember how much you have faced, and how you manage to come across with unrivaled wit and insight. You are unstoppable. You give me something to shoot for, an example to follow.

Shirley Ujest, Duck Duck Goose, Swimming Riddles, Fretful Porpentine, Nacho4Sara and so many others . . . I want you in my life. The message board isn’t enough. You make me laugh. You make me think. You make me smile. You make me feel lucky to read your words. So, um . . . you’ll be moving out here soon, right? Well, maybe I’ll settle for a dinner together or something.

Let’s not forget the men, either. But that’s another post. :wink:

(And, of course, if anyone has some love to slap on me, I wouldn’t mind at all. It gets a bit lonely out here. A little bolstering is never unwelcome.)

I wanna give a shoutout to…

Silverfire for having a captivating and sexy voice

Nocturne for calling me a yankee

Medea’s Child for being able to turn my mood with a purr

Scotticher for being the StraightDope Mom :slight_smile:

Weirddave for helping me sort out my situation at home

Punny for reasons as Dave, but moreso

Chique(Sandyr) for calling me, among other things, a little shit for leaving messages on her machine, just 'cause I know it pisses her off :slight_smile:

I always do, and will love y’all as family. you guys make me feel special everyday. Thanks for being there for me in thick and thin, and may God have ,mercy on your soul.

P.S. I wanna tell Dave that his help means so much to me, that I never will be able to thank him enough. if not giving me advice, he’s telling me humorous stories, and tricks of the trade of life. Thanks Dave!!!

Thank you, Adam.

I am HAPPY to be the Sraight Dope mom!

And let me take this opportunity to adopt Nacho4Sara into my virtual family. If she so wishes, that is.


I don’t really know that many people here yet, but I do know that SpiderWoman is cool as heck, as is Polycarp and Jodi.

I’m sure there are plenty that I have good rights to praise, but my memory fails me.

So: Kudos to everyone who puts up with me. :wink:

Eep! How could I forget Silver Fire, who actually wants to meet me??


I wasn’t certain what this thread was going to be about exactly, but since it was started by the lovely and talented Scotticher, I thought I would poke my head in. Much to my surprise, I’ve learned that she has issues about her own self-esteem.
Cheri, you are, without question, the single most compassionate and thoughtful person here on the boards…I challenge anyone out there to disagree. I so appreciate the kind words you’ve passed along to me, as well as others here. I said before to AudreyK that I hoped that my own daughter could grow up to be like her…I share this wish with you, as well.
There are so many wonderful people on these boards who have shared their warmth and graciousness with me that I am touched to my very soul. I’ve stated previously that I am honored to be a part of this kind and generous family. Too many names to list and too much humility to probably recognize themselves without my saying. But I hope that somehow they know who I’m talking about.

I have heard your words and return them in kind: "Thank you, sweet Cheri, for the precious gift that you have given all of us. I know you didn’t start this thread fishing for compliments, so I hope you’re not embarassed about my thoughts here…but your OP asked if there were people with a need to tell someone how much they’ve meant, so here’s my opinion…sorry if I got a little saccharine.

ssskuggiii’s been there a lot, and I don’t think I’ve given her enough credit for our talks. Thank you Tasha, a lot.

Sea Diver has also been there to listen once, which was nice. I thank you too, very much.

Appreciate all those SDMBers who, like me, breaks out in hives every time the SDMB turns into a big circle jerk.

Additionally I appreciate baglady, for being so good in the sack.

You know, this thread is just going to break the hearts of self-hating people who aren’t mentioned. . .

I couldn’t even begin to list everyone who has been kind and supportive to me. I had a really rough time of it over the summer with problems in my love life, problems with my parents, problems at work, being dignosed with depression, GF being diagnosed with breast cancer, GF having a miscarriage, etc…

This is not an all-inclusive list, I’m sure to forget some of the many names of the people who helped me, but thanks to:

You guys really have no idea how much your kind words and responses helped when things looked at their worst for me. At a time when I felt friendless and alone, you proved me wrong.

OK. I’m slightly drunk, so take this with a grain of salt…

phouka – Whoa, I made your list? Wow.

evensven – I’m not sure I ever gave you proper thanks for the backpacking advice, way back when, so consider it said.

DubDopers – Definitely owe y’all a few pints of Guinness, if you ever make it to NC.

London_Calling – Don’t think we’ve ever actually interacted, but you strike me as grace under pressure personified.

ThisYearsGirl – “Not mentioned,” eh? Hah.

Thank you, Scott.

You really, truly have no idea how much your kind words mean to me.

And, I love you too!


Wow, I opened this thinking that of all people, I need some self-esteem the most. I’m awed that someone included me! Thanks phouka - I truly appreciate it. I think I’m gonna cry. :slight_smile:

Scotticher, I would love to be adopted into the virtual family. I can use all the love I can get!

Now for my thanks:

To everyone who responded in my thread about my aunt: I’ve been trying to read those e-mails again and reply, but I can’t do it yet without crying. Rest assured that there will be much love coming your way once I can, though. Every one of you gave me comfort when I felt alone, when I needed it most. It’s never been an easy thing for me to talk about my lousy childhood (besides you guys, a grand total of maybe ten people know IRL). So when I do open up and people respond, it slays me. It inspires me to be a more open, honest person IRL. I’m still working on it, but your kindness helps tremendously.

Falcon: Our AIM conversations, though few, give me much comfort as well. I regard you as the smart, wise, loving older sister I never had.

Ender: The e-mail you sent me was perhaps the sweetest thing anyone has ever said about me. I wish I could tap my heels and come visit you on Kansas, but until then, it’s wonderful being able to consider you a friend.

Lux Fiat: I look forward to your e-mails. You are terribly, awesomely cool and the King of Sarcasm (I know I told you this already) and I wish I knew more people like you IRL.

Billdo: When I was a newbie under attack, you came in and defended me. I had all of 75 posts, and I was lost in GD, but you understood what I was saying and stood up for me. I might have left the board after that, but because of you I didn’t. For that, you will always be my hero. And your huge hospitality when I stayed with you was incredible. Thank you so much! Mad props to Green Bean, OverEngineer, and Spot the Wonder Pup for being crazy fun and making me feel ten times more comfortable at the NYC Dopefest.

Lexicon: This might sound twisted, but I’ve come to respect and value your opinions, and the honesty with which you convey them. If everyone was as up-front and open as you, life would make a hell of a lot more sense. I get a kick out of seeing how you respond to posters. “Life is suffering.” Brilliant. Words to live by. And since I just read about it a few days ago, Happy Belated Engagement.

Ukelele Ike and Swiddles: You two are so conistently brilliant and hilarious in your posts. I love to see your names in the “Last Post” column, because I know it’s going to be a kick-ass post. Also, Swiddles, the support you offered a few weeks back was wonderful, exactly what I needed. I wish I could find someone as smart, witty and kind as you down here in Baltimore.

Hamadryad: OK, at first you scared me. But now I worship the ground you walk on. I know very few people who manage to bring out my even crazier side and keep me on my toes; you do a great job of it. I will never, ever, as long as I live, forget dancing with you on West 72nd St, loudly singing “OOOOOOpppppsss I diiiiiid it agggggain!” in my Scooby Doo pajamas while onlookers called 911.

Ok, it’s getting long and ishy, so that’s it for now. I’ll probably be back. :slight_smile:

Woodthrush Thanks for talking to me and actually saying hi to mean in #SD, you’re a fun guy :slight_smile:

Silver Fire Same, you’re a great friend, and wonderful to chat with

WallyM7 You’re the absolute best, wherever you are. You, even though I only read one or two of your posts, brought me here. I knew you for a day, but you touched my life :slight_smile:

Iampunha:He’s always been there for me as a friend and there are other reasons I’d rather not discuss on the board.
Sk8rixtx:He also has talked me through the rough times I’ve had lately and I enjoy talking to him when I can.
Monster104:Dave is genuinely funny and seems to always be making me laugh, especially when the topic leads to our [lack of] sex lives.
Spoofe BO Diddly:Silliness is always key in a conversation with the Spoofster. And he always brings up a point of view I hadn’t really thought of.
Nocturne:A genuinely nice person who brings out a different perspective for me to view and also helps me understand people better.