**“Demolition Man”, did anyone find the “Kinder, Gentler” society of San Angeles appealing?
Wesley Snipes reports to prison Dec 9
**
My wife had a miscarriage
I had a wisdom tooth pulled today
Sheesh, Dopers are losing things out of their own bodies left and right …
The Brothel on My Street Was Shut Down. (And the Cafe Closed.)
Could I Send Y’all This Instead…
Well, it’s not the leggy redhead I was hoping for…but hey, gift horse in the mouth, and all that.
New doper baby!
Are Ritz Crackers suddenly more salty?
It’s the placenta spread. Everything’s better on a Ritz.
I like the new TSA pat downs
Is there a name for this “logic fallacy”?
I don’t think a personal opinion counts as a logical fallacy.
**Needs ways to lose the belly fat!
Poll: Doper BMI (Body Mass Index)
**
Why does rape get special status?
Not pit-level annoyance, just a peeve about pedo and rape hysteria…
So how bad can being censured be?
Crusty Nostrils?
Yup, if he gets impeached he’ll get a sinus headache.
Spicen’ up your sex life…
Condomless Sex better for men too
TSA is a part of the “Homosexual Agenda”, says ® Eugene Delguadio.
I like the new TSA pat downs
See? The homosexers love 'em! Soon all domestic flights will be 90% queer.
CC: This isn’t really a pitting, but since it’s personal…
Fucking TV Station
May you get sodomized by rabid grizzlies, you sub-human bastard(s)
Closed captioning for the rage-inducing.
**Winter’s a-coming! Season of Death Mini-Rants
Ho-fucking-ho: Christmas Season mini-rants **
My goodness, we’re a whiny bunch this time of year.
**What would you order from this menu?
Real Coney Island Chili dog. **
I got a free half-tank of gas last night!
Crimes you have witnessed
Free gas, stolen gas, tomayto, potahto.
**turns of phrase you find unintentionally hillarious
Merry Christmas. You’re Fired. **
**7th annual plea to stop smoking
Saving Ryan’s Privates: Bombproof Underwear **
Uhm, it’s not the smoking that I worry about.
**7th annual plea to stop smoking
I quit smoking 15 hours ago! I feel weird. Can’t focus. 
**
Hey, **Khadaji **- looks like someone took you up on it 
(though it doesn’t sound like she’s too excited about it right now 
)
** I don’t know what to do with my life…
I like the new TSA pat downs**
Well at least that’s one thing you’ve got.
How come my cleaning lady isn’t in better shape?
I’d NEVER pay for sex, but if [insert celebrity name here] was available, that’d change
Struck out with the cleaning lady, huh?
Needed: some really filthy romance novels
Santa Claus is NOT here to help out.
It’s a humdinger. Santa comes down the chimney, gets involved with bored housewife on Xmas eve, is shot by outraged husband. Kids still score great presents.
Reactions to alcohol
Did Old West outlaws ever tie women to train tracks?
Sequential threads - You’ll shoot your eye out, kid.
Crimes you have witnessed
**
You need to have your insides medically examined. Do you take a tube down the mouth or up the butt?
Don’t waste your time/money on ____ (stuff that DOESN’T work)**
A (not so) fond farewell to the Grand Marquis
Moments of schadenfreude in your life.
How do I get my cat to quit climbing our Christmas tree?
Ever put action figures in the Nativity scene?