Norm Macdonald has said that the perfect joke is one where the setup and the punchline are the same. An example is the weekend update bit that went:
This just in , Yippie Abby Hofmann has died; excuse me, I misread that, yippee! Abby Hofmann has died!
Are there any other good examples?
I like one where a guy is on the phone saying “You don’t say…You don’t say…” And when he hangs up the person with him asks who it was. “He didn’t say”
One more from MacDonald: “Julia Roberts told reporters this week that her marriage to Lyle Lovett has been over for some time. The key moment, she said, came when she realized that she was Julia Roberts, and that she was married to Lyle Lovett.”
A: Who are you and how did you get in here?
B: I’m a locksmith, and I’m a locksmith.
Something from the PBS show the Electric Company. The plumber who came to fix the sink.
If I throw the ball to first base, somebody’s gotta get it. Now who has it?
Naturally.
Who?
Naturally.
Naturally?
Naturally.
So I pick up the ball and I throw it to Naturally.
No you don’t, you throw the ball to Who.
Naturally.
That’s different.
That’s what I said!
You’re not saying it…
I throw the ball to Naturally.
You throw it to Who.
Naturally.
Norm is the king of this kind of thing. A heads-up for Norm fans. You really need to check out *Mike Tyson Mysteries *on Adult Swim. Norm just kills it, and steals the show. Pants-wetting funny stuff!
Does this quote from Hawkeye Pierce count?
“I will not carry a gun, Frank. When I got thrown into this war I had a clear understanding with the Pentagon: no guns. I’ll carry your books, I’ll carry a torch, I’ll carry a tune, I’ll carry on, carry over, carry forward, Cary Grant, cash and carry, carry me back to Old Virginia, I’ll even ‘hari-kari’ if you show me how, but I will not carry a gun!”
From ZORRO, THE GAY BLADE, when the evil alcalde has, for just a moment, come to suspect that Don Diego de la Vega might be the flamboyant whip-wielder who talks of naughtiness and parades around in a rose-colored ensemble.
[accusatorily] “Say something like a sissy-boy.”
[in a deep voice] “…‘something like a sissy-boy’.”
As this spur-of-the-moment stuff doesn’t pan out, the alcalde puts together a more elaborate plan: a celebration where valuable loot will be on display — as tempting bait for the daring thief, see. But, even knowing that, the guards will of course still have their work cut out for them. “Remember: stay alert. He is cunning! He is crafty! He is not just going to walk in here and say ‘Here I aaaaaaam’!”
Zorro walks in. “Here I aaaaaaam!”
George Allen: Say good night, Gracie.
Gracie: Good night, Gracie.
It’s an entirely different kind of flying altogether.
In ANT-MAN, a retired superhero gives a reformed thief a second chance.
“Are you ready to redeem yourself?” “Absolutely; my days of breaking into places and stealing shit are done. What do you want me to do?” “…I want you to break into a place and steal some shit.”
It’s the sheer Michael-Douglas-ness of the delivery that really sells it.
A blind man walks into a bar.
One my Norm favorites, although not quite in line with the OP:
"This year the number one song was by the band “Better than Ezra.”
The number two band? “Ezra”.
I don’t remember the comedian, but the joke was:
The best thing about marriage is that you get to sleep with one woman for the rest of your our life.
The worst thing is you get to sleep with one woman for the rest of your life.
It’s an entirely different kind of flying.
Nit pick: “altogether” is not spoken a second time.
The Simpsons, Season 9, Episode 8, “Lisa the Skeptic”
Principal Skinner, over the school PA:
“Attention, all honor students will be rewarded with a trip to an archaeological dig. Conversely, all detention students will be punished with a trip to an archaeological dig.”
“The winner of the contest will win a one-week all expense paid trip to Philadelphia. Second prize is a two-week all expense paid trip to Philadelphia.”
Knock knock
Who’s there?
Control freak. Okay, now you say “control freak who?”
The first limericks by Edward Lear (who apparently invented the form) usually repeated the last word of first line at the end of the last line. They kind of sucked for that reason: