My wife moved most of her stuff to her new apartment yesterday. House is pretty empty. I sleep on an air mattress now.
I still haven’t found a place to move, but I have until the end of September to do so. Tomorrow my wife is taking me to a tote the note car dealer (Casa de Auto) to help me buy something to get to and from work now. I have my eye on a '95 Saturn with 130K miles on it, it’s about the best car I can afford the down payment on.
I’m not as sad as I expected, but then I have had a month and a half to adjust to the idea, and she has been staying at friends a good 80% of the time for the last month or so anyway.
I did have some fun last night. A friend took me to a rather seedy local bar (Spankees, DFW dwellers may know of it) where he is a regular. Arranged for me to be a judge in a ‘Booty Contest’, which resulted in me being flirted with by a lot by contestants. Afterwards we went to his friends apartment and I ended up having sex with some woman whose name I don’t even know. First time I got laid in about 2 months. Wasn’t as much fun as the booty contest.
Other news…I’ve completed training at my new job, and things are looking promising. Several trainers and my supervisor are impressed with my skills, but I think that should be expected, I’m working at an entry-level job with 7 years of experience. I’m already applying for promotions, I need them as I am making about a third what I was getting at my old job.
Life goes on, but my future seems pretty bleak. The single life isn’t that appealing to me now that I am experiencing it, and the chances of me finding someone new seem pretty slim. After all, I am an overweight and underpaid man who is losing his hair and living with his parents.
Best of luck to ya. Your future doesn’t sound so bleak to me!
It seems to me that you’re slowly moving into an up-swing. New beginnings and all that.
Eh, I hate sounding like a cheerleader. At the very least, I can assure you you’re not alone.
Signed-overweight divorced chick, outta work, outta car, and would live with her parents if they were still alive…who hasn’t had sex in a good five years.
I figure that there are always worse scenarios. For example. Do you have both legs, and can you walk? Yes? Well, think of those who can’t walk. It just works for me when I feel low about what is really trivial in the big scheme. [Not to minimize your situations]. Wishing you both better luck.
My divorce will be final tomorrow afternoon. It sucks big time because I work mid shift and go to school full time, which leaves no time to go out and meet people. All of “our friends” turned into “her friends” when we split, so I am pretty much alone.
I have a little girl as well so I make time for her a few nights a week. I haven’t been laid since Feb, about a week before we split up. I haven’t even talked to many women since we split. Its hard. Still kinda love my ex, but we are still friends I guess. For my girl.
My best advice is to strap in for a long ride. It takes alot of time to get over it, but you will. I am starting to move on, but its tough. If you don’t have any kids it will be MUCH easier because you won’t need to see her on a regular basis. If I didn’t have my little girl I wouldn’t have talked to my ex in the last 4 months or so. I keep waiting for her to start seeing someone else, assuming she is not already, because that is when my true test is going to happen.
Not the advice or sympathy that you wanted, but if you are going for a 7 year old car with 130k on it, go with a Toyota Tercel. I had one at the same time my mom had a Saturn- same size, etc. but the Toyota needed an interier lightbulb after 120k, while the Saturn needed tons of stuff…
AS for recovering and moving on…it seems to me that you aren’t doing too bad. You’ve been laid, you’re getting compliments at work and now is a GREAT opportunity to start exercising again to lose that weight!
But the break-up road sucks and is unfortunately a bit long…good luck!
Batz I really feel for you. It’s been a while since something someone wrote really touched a chord in me as much as this. I’ve been down that road. Even though it was my choice, it’s still hard, it still hurts and life changes forever. It takes time. Use this time to work slowly slowly slowly on what you decide you want in life. The job part will take care of itself because you will move up the ladder fairly quickly. And yes, believe it or not, you will love again and it will be someone that will love you equally.
A very good friend separated with his wife of 6 years two weeks ago, and she insists on filing for divorce and being in the “driver’s seat.” I know what it’s like at least from the outside.
Not being with his wife is not so bad, but not seeing his son every night is what kills him.
Just think that it is only going to get better. The sadness will eventually run its course. The fact that you are getting some sex, even if it’s not the “right” kind, shows that, when you are ready, the wimmin’s will be too.
