Shopping channel snark

This is really not shopping channel related but it is related to poop. Since it’s holiday time my email box is running over. One of the emails is about a new product to my your shit look beautiful. It’s a pill you swallow in your choice of colors and when you take a mighty dump…your shit is all glittery and beautiful!

I love on of LR’s FB posters asking why Jill has not been supportive of GILI and wanted to know if LR’s leaving has to do with Jill making her work life miserable. Of course, LR was very diplomatic with her answer…“she and Jill have different styles, yada, yada, yada.” TRANSLATION: Jill is a bitch from hell and I hate the ground she walks on!!!

Green Bean, you are a great big tease! My mind is a terrible and frightening place and I want to read all the wierdness you have dangled in front of us this afternoon. Site references, please!

I have to grudgingly admit some admiration for the multi-tasking individual with the toothpaste-as-lubricant tale. No waxy yellow build up for THAT Mary Hartman. :wink:

Lol Right? What does the Rep do if that happens, I wonder? My guess is to drag you back into the bathroom with her so she can give you a full, live demonstration. I don’t recall her saying that, myself. I must have been too enthralled by Poo’s story of mulching her toilet and stench blasting Mr. Closet Guy. Never to be outdone, is Our Shawnie Sue Poo Poo.

LipLiner…

Lol!! I just peed my pants from laughing so hard.:stuck_out_tongue:

No worries, Green Bean. Despite our apparently goody-two-shoes reputation here, we are not, in fact, delicate flowers. Feel free to share.

Most of us just marvel that such tales are coming out of our televisions from supposedly professional salespeople that are trying to entice us with their wares. If a friend of mine wants to tell me a mulch and stench story - hilarious. A salesperson that you don’t really know from Adam…not so much. :smiley:

Ah yes, too funny that the Frau has been the only one to refuse to wear the Giggly TSV. I wonder if she figures, “Hey, I’ve worked here for over 20 years, what are they going to do, fire me?” I hope not, for her sake. :eek: LOL
Note: TSV = Today’s Special Value. :slight_smile:

Thank you. That post was straight up delusional.

Okay, here ya go then: Another bathroom etiquette memo: Do you have a prehensile rectum? - The BBQ Pit - Straight Dope Message Board

I’m not obsessed with poop or disgusting bodily functions, by the way. I’m just trying to scare you all away. :stuck_out_tongue:

Well. Now I do feel I’m not quite cool or “smart” enough to post here. Can’t we just have fun in our own little corner of the message boards?

Yes, we can. :slight_smile: It’s cool. Lots of the established posters have been very welcoming.

It may be good to stick to the safe haven of Cafe Society. I, for one, will never look at a cardboard tube the same way again. :frowning:

It warms my heart to see my shopping channel friends having so much fun here. My fellow Dopers have been wonderful, as I knew they would. :slight_smile:

I feel that has something to do with gerbils.

The reality is much worse.

Yup. Unfortunately there’s nothing remotely amusing about it. Seriously, you’ll be less disappointed by fellow members of humanity if you just forget about it.

When we ditched satellite/cable and scanned for all the OTA channels there were several shopping channels from ION, I think. I blocked them because I wasn’t interested. Now I’m thinking about adding them back just for the snicker factor now that I know it exists. Maybe I’ve been watching these channels wrong the whole time…

Yes - most definitely doing it wrong. :wink: Try it, you might like it our way. JOINNN USSS! JOINNNNN USSS!

Well, isn’t that touching - The Frau wishes her dad were still alive. So that he could taste Rachel Ray’s seasoning blend. :smack:

Somehow, I doubt it’s her seasoning blend he would be interested in.

Depending on where it got sprinkled, I suppose. :smiley: Although I’m guessing that’s not what she meant.

Where does Lori Greiner get her stuff? She’s showing pens with fake crystals, and you get the idea that it’s her invention. BULL. I’ve had one of those pens for years that I got at a charity function. It’s nothing new or innovative. She just finds stuff and puts her name on it. Yes, some of her things she gets from Shark Tank, but those things are few and far between.