Before I get to the question, a little background. On a sexual orientation scale of 1 to 10, 10 being completely hetero, I rate about a 2. Nonetheless, I have been attracted to, and had fulfilling personal and sexual relationships with a couple of men in the past (uh, not at the same time). The thing is, I am six feet tall, and my boyfriends were all short. Very short. The most recent one was 5’1". Now, when we went out in public, we got a lot of strange looks, and we sometimes overheard conversations that the speakers apparently didn’t think we could hear, usually expressing disgust that I should be seeing someone of his… stature. So, I reiterate. What’s the deal? What exactly is the problem so many people seem to have with short guy-tall girl couples? There doesn’t seem to be much of a problem with the vice versa situation. Is it something about the stereotypes about short guys? Or tall women? I just don’t get it.
I have no idea. But I love your handle.
Veni, Vidi, Visa … I came, I saw, I bought.
SWM, 6’5" reporting.
For me, it’s not a stereotypical view of twerps… umm… I mean, the shorter men among us. Although, I did know a pipsqueak who exclusively dated tall women. Can you say “compensation”?
It’s just that tall women (6’ and over) are in… ahem… short supply. They are a precious natural resource to men who are gifted with additional height! Imagine! Not having to put a girl on a barstool just to kiss her! I’m not even going to discuss 69…
Short women, on the other hand, are all over the place. I personally come home every day with 8 or 9 of them stuck to the bottom of my shoe.
But the looks of disgust are probably nothing more than envy, neuro. Height, to many people, is an attractive quality. And being attractive usually breeds envy. Personally, I try to be above that sort of behavior.
Give them all that “bite me hard look” sugar! I’m not as tall as you (5’9") but most of my men have been as tall or shorter. Other folks don’t like it? Kiss my ass, that’s if you can reach it!
There’s nothing wrong with it, but it does look kind of funny (funny haha, not funny peculiar).
The problem with tall women is that guys can’t look down their . . .
cough
My guess is that seeing a tall woman with a short man implies that the man is being dominated. Some people just don’t like the idea of that.
Personally, I feel it’s none of their damn business.
– Sylence
“The problem with reality is the lack of background music.” – Anon
I’m 6’2", but there are plenty of tall women who have appealed to me.
in school i was taller than my boyfriend by several inches. at first i developed a huge complex about it, avoiding mirrors when we were together… and then developed a terrible slouch to appear his height.
finally i realized how stupid that was. he loved me and had originally been attracted to me for my long legs and graceful high posture. i had pretty much ruined the posture with my insecurity. so i stood tall and people’s reactions to us was so much different and better.
sure, people still sometimes assumed i was ‘domininant’ over him because i was bigger but so what? we were happy together and yes, our bodies fit together just fine. :o
“Argue for your limitations; sure enough, they’re yours.”
I don’t know what the big deal is. I’m 6 inches taller than my husband, and it was never really an issue. It did weird me out a little at first; he told me later that it weirded him out a little too (then a mutual friend told us each separately to get over it, so we did!).
To be honest, I don’t really think about it anymore, except when I need to do something that requires height (in a reversal of gender stereotypes, I get to do most of the exterior maintenance on our home, because I have the reach). We haven’t had too many funny looks in public.
I think that it’s probably just unexpected to most people. The average man is taller than the average woman, so the average pairing is taller man-shorter woman. I know two taller man-shorter woman couples where the man is much taller than the woman (more than 12 inches, in both cases), and they get more odd looks than we do.
The Cat In The Hat
How tall are you, OfficeGirl? (The girls I remember in high school, about 17 or 18 years old, were 5’11" at the most.) And some of theme were imposing in other ways as well.
well I’m only 5’8" but for some reason people always think I’m much much taller.
a picture of the bf and me… http://www.homestead.com/allusions/photos.html
Part of the reason people expect the man to be taller is that men are taller than women on average, by about 4 inches. So, if you match up an entire population, the man will usually be taller than the woman in each couple.
I consider myself an average size young man, 5’8". I usually like women who are my height or a few inches shorter. However, I have noticed that some taller women do seem attracted to me, more so than I am to them. I don’t know why. I call it the Sonny and Cher complex.
I know some men who are married to taller women, and can think of several famous couples, mostly supermodels and their husband(s). Sonny Bono and Cher (what is her last name?), Jerry Hall and Mick Jagger, Christie Brinkley and Bill Joel. The most extreme case I can think of is Susan Anton and that midget with the accent from the Fantasy Island show (what’s his name?) I don’t think their marriage lasted long. Maybe they just did it for humor?
Also, there is a local dating/social club where I live for Tall Singles. Men have to be at least 6’2" and woman at least 5’10". This implies that tall men and women like each other. However, it has also strikes me as unfair discrimination. A lot of cities have Tall Singles clubs, but don’t have Short Singles clubs. How about singles clubs for short people to meet each other?
Well, cg, if short people had social clubs, the people from the tall social clubs would crash the party and romp around like Godzilla.
Although I’d love to cater a shortie social club. I’d have really high tables. And I’d hand out phone books at the entrance
I dated a short guy a couple times, and found it to be very uncomfortable. Well, we also had very different personalities, which didn’t help. But it just felt so strange.
Of course, I’m a big girl in other ways besides height (though I am about 5’7" which is sort of tall), so I just felt like Godzilla next to him. When he hugged me, I was afraid he wouldn’t be able to get his arms around me, and when I kissed me, I was afraid he would have to stand on his tippy-toes to reach. It was just very awkward.
My husband is about 1" taller than me. I’m much more comfy with that
“I hope life isn’t a big joke, because I don’t get it,” Jack Handy
I believe Susan Anton was dating Dudley Moore not Herve Villechez.
Sorry for the nitpicking. Im in a group for it…
“Hi, Im Frankie and Im a nitpicker!”
Hey Frankie, you forgot the apostrophes…
Anyway, nit-picking aside, thanks for the enlightenment. I cannot tell you how pissed off that crap always made me. It was okay, though, because I usually responded with a particular icy glare that I have mastered, and besides, he may have been small in stature, but he had a big brain, and a big heart, and a big… you see where I’m going with this. It put a crimp in a couple of sexual positions, but nothing a couple of creative and open-minded individuals couldn’t overcome. Anyway, we eventually parted on good terms. He wanted to see other women. So did I. A few days ago, something reminded me of that whole phenomenon, and I decided to post. I still don’t understand why people feel hostility towards such pairings as ours, but at least it makes a little more sense.
Hey girl-
We have room for one more in our group. Want to join?
Anyway, I guess maybe I should at least try to post on topic huh?
Having been one to look, I can tell you I look for one of two reasons.
- Its just different. Like a few people have mentioned it’s not something you’d see everyday. Its kinda like a cat on a leash. Nothing wrong with that but you’d sure as heck stare at it no?
b) Cause you are freekin gorgeous. This is usually the case when I get caught staring at a woman. (more often than I’d care to admit.)
And for the record. I am 6’ but I love tall women. If I could always be with someone 5’9+ it’d be fine with me.
On second thought…I like the variety!
Once, I dated a man shorter than me. It bothered him so much that he broke up with me over it. We had a long discussion about it when he first asked me out,and I thought that I made it clear to him that it wasn’t a problem for me but no go.
I never brought the subject up but he always did. Finally he told me that he couldn’t take it anymore and broke up with me. I always thought that there had to be more to it than that, but I don’t know…
MaryAnn
Sometimes life is so great you just gotta muss up your hair and quack like a duck!
I have some really tall female friends, between five foot ten and six foot two. None of them want to date shorter men. I don’t want a man smaller than me either, but then agian I am only five feet tall.
Andre Agassi - Brook Shields, another celeb “mixed height” couple. All the celeb couples named in this thread got divorced, so maybe taller woman/short men marriages aren’t good. However, a lot of celeb marriages end in divorce.