Mrs. Pluto and I frequently remind each other that however difficult it might be to remain married it is certainly easier than dating. No wait, Mrs. P. always says that. Do you suppose it means anything? Hmmmm.
I still recall, with excruciating clarity, the difficulty I had asking girls on dates. Even if I knew for a fact they were going to say yes. I was exposing my feelings to someone who could, if she chose, stomp on them, laugh at them, ignore them or, worst of all, tell all her friends about them. Not a comfortable place for a high-school boy who could barely recognize that he had feelings, much less understand them. And feelings about girls(!) were all the more confused.
Unfortunately, if I keep making jokes at Mrs. Pluto’s expense I may have the opportunity after all to re-live those days. (And it’s not like my feelings about girls are any less confused.)
Standard Disclaimer: Mrs. Pluto is a wonderful person, a wonderful wife and mother. Any statements made by any person on this board depicting her otherwise are patently false. Lame attempts at humor are not excluded. (Are you through proofreading this yet, dear? Can I submit it?)
“I’ll tell him but I don’t think he’ll be very keen. He’s already got one, you see!”
I tried this method a couple of times with guys at work. I’d pick up a little funny non-sexual card. I’d send it to the guy with a message along the lines of maybe having a drink after work sometimes if he would like. And I would explain that I sent the card so that he wouldn’t feel on the spot, then I’d put my extension number on the card and if he was interested he could call, if not it would be ok. One guy did call. The other guy I really didn’t expect to hear from because he was a little strange and I think it was just a challenge to get him to respond. He never did, although we speak very pleasantly to each other in passing. I’m not much on dating people I work with so I didn’t try it again. I’m still friends with both of them. If the guy is shy, I think that’s your answer right there.
** Sigh. So many men, so few who can afford me ** Original by Wally
I’ve learned that if someone says something unkind about me, I must live so that no one will believe it.
I’ve got a major crush on this girl i went to highschool with. She busted out and went to college back east. While I’m out west. I’ve tried to tell her… and failed… Once I tried to ask her out… and she … had a boyfriend… ARG Crash and burn…
Okay we’re still friends… so… I find out she’s got some guy she’s hanging out with…
he doesnt’ want a relationship with her… but she likes him… so i go along… finally say something stupid like… “well that sucks… now i can’t have you”… and… she says "well its not my fault… you’re just so far away… " arg!! not again!! So… this stupid bastard plays her… guess what!?? She hates men now! damn him! Not because I didn’t get a chance to be with her, but because he made her unhappy.
Once again… `I’m the really nice guy… I tell her that the guy is retarded for cheating on youblah blah… then i answered the starburst question… and I have a dinner date… and just now… i said we should watch a movie. She said… ‘cool’
yet she hates all males… anotherwards… I’ve just trapped myself. I can’t move romantically without doing either… hurting her… or… not having a chance at all.
Life goes on. I hope she’s happy though She’s way out of my league anyway…
Kell, if he didn’t say “Oh, Ghod! You can’t mean it?!?! A Goddess like You wants to go out with a wretch from lowly accounting like me?!? YES! YES! Oh Ghod, YYYYEEEEEESSSSS!!!”–then , obviously, he has no taste–and you’re better off without him.
Besides, I’m jealous.
You should tell the truth, expose the lies and live in the moment."-Bill Hicks
“You should tell the lies, live the truth and expose yourself.” - Bill Clinton
I’m always happy to hand out hugs, Demo, but don’t ever use the words “pasta” and “salad” right next to each other in my presence. such a cold, rubbery, mayonnaise-smeared end I would not wish on ANY pasta, however evil.
I smelled like balsamic vinegar and fresh basil because I was mentally making grilled portobello mushrooms balsamico for someone.
kellibelli, I can empathize with you. That must have been hard to do, and then to have him reject you like that. Again, what some others have said could be true, he’s clueless; and it may well take a 2X4 over the head to get his attention.
{{{{{{{{{{{kelli}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}
Chin up, shoulders back, smile, and let him see what he’s missing out on. You’re a wonderful person, from what I’ve read of your posts. There are other fish in the sea.
As to my own story. Well, I definitely have one, but I’m not going to share it right now. It has recently come to light that I should/could have handled it differently, and because I was an insecure mass of feelings I didn’t know how to express, I lost. I’m getting choked up even thinking about it. Sorry. Maybe another time I can share this story.
You are more than a human being, you are a human becoming.
Og Mandino
That’s my name, not a description. I am neither purple nor a bear. Okay, so I’m purple.<a true Wally original!>
My real big heartbreak story (I’m going to spare all the details about the beginning of our “relationship” although I should say we were friends for several months before I asked him out and just jump right into the rejection): He called me ugly. And not like a “I’m not sexually attracted to you” ugly, but he just came out and said that I was too ugly for him. That was two years ago (junior year of HS), butI’ve never really gotten over it.
“I need the biggest seed bell you have. . . no, that’s too big.”–Hans Moleman
All right, kel, let’s see if this’ll make you feel any better:
About two summers ago, a good friend of mine was desperately trying to set me up with his girlfriend’s twin sister. At the time, we were nothing more than casual acquaintances, but I was developing quite a thing for her. We hung out together a few times and talked on the phone quite a bit for a couple of weeks before I could quite gather the courage to ask her out. I finally do, after being assured by both my friend and his girlfriend that the answer will be yes. Her response:
When I was 16, there was this girl I liked. I had, in fact, liked her for about five years off and on, and I’m still not sure why… But I’d probably still like her now anyway.
However, one day, through my stupidly saying something to someone (I can’t remember who) she found out that I liked her. And she came up to me, asked if it was true, and I nodded, honestly.
She sneered with distaste, and turned away.
sigh
And my social life has been downhill from there ever since.
When will the ugly guys realize that it’s their job to lie down and die while the attractive ones finish populating this earth?
Blah… I can’ really give any good stories like this because I was always too chicken to ask anyone. The one time I did I was dead drunk, and realized it halkfway through my slurred speech. I apologized, bowed, and walked away. I swear, if it weren’t for my devilish good looks, I’d never get laid.
Now if I only weren’t such an asshole I might find a real relationship.
I met Mr. Rilch in my last semester of college. He volunteered to assist on my senior project (and later told me he was watching my butt, in those tourniquet jeans I used to wear) all the time. Then we did a skit in acting class. I realized a) He was interested and b) he was too insecure to ask. I pictured myself, a year from that time, wishing we’d gotten together and regretting not having made a move. So I thought about what would be a good activity for a first date, and asked him to go to opening day at Three Rivers Stadium. After he picked his jaw up off the floor, he said yes. Of course, I didn’t realize that the two guys lurking about were his two best friends, who ragged him mercilessly all afternoon. But not in a nasty way; they were actually happy for him, because what I also didn’t know was that I was his first date since his senior prom (fix-up). Anyway, we made plans to meet downtown and walk over to the stadium. Five minutes before the appointed time, this Adonis who I’d had a crush on the previous year, and who theretofore had taken as much notice of me as a lamppost, passes by and starts a conversation. I was terrified that the future Mr. Rilch would see us and be scared off, but he left seconds before Mr. Rilch hove into sight. We got to the stadium in time to watch batting practice, and I smoked half a pack during that time.
Anyway, I don’t want to depress you further, but I think my point there was that if someone wants to get to know you better, they’ll say yes, even if you’re asking them to go see Lake Placid. (I have another anecdote about a different guy and myself going to see a perfectly terrible but highbrow movie, because neither of us at-the-time film snobs wanted to lose face by vetoing it.)
But take comfort in the fact that he didn’t say yes, only for the sake of seeing the movie, while letting you think that he was interested in you, and then pull the LJBF routine on you.
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Ghirardelli for Kellibelli
“His eyes are as green as a fresh-pickled toad,
His hair is as dark as a blackboard,
I wish he was mine, he’s really divine,
The hero who conquered the Dark Lord.”
Maybe he is married? Maybe he has a girlfriend? Maybe he has too many kids to watch right now? Maybe he doesn’t like aggressive women? You could ask him again KB next to the water cooler? Just cause he says no doesn’t mean he won’t say yes sometime.
She’s way out of my league anyway…