Dude, anything less than an unambigous “yes” means no. Everytime. Think about it. If someone you were interested in wanted to go on a date but you had something you couldn’t get out of you would make sure to suggest an alternative time/date.
Edited to add: like Happy Lendervedder said, many of us (such as myself) have been this needy, insecure guy that looked for ANY sign the girl was interested while ignoring or downplaying every sign she wasn’t.
Agreed, that’s not really something that just kind of ‘accidentally’ happens outside of movies, that a dozen date requests lead to some kind of wacky mixup each time where your mom’s friend intercepts the message and shows up instead, or you tried to get to the date but there was a fake bomb threat called in by your zany friends who are trying to interfere, etc.
It is highly likely that if instead she’s been saying “oh, gosh, that doesn’t work for next Saturday because we’re having my great-grandma’s funeral/I’m washing my hair/I’m taking up skydiving/I’m moving out of the country,” and fails to present a counter-offer for another date, that she actually means “no.” Maybe then she means:
Why are you still asking this girl out, if she’s turned you down a dozen times? Add me to the list of people who are always amazed at the sheer obstinacy of the human race. Dude: She’s just not that into you. True 'dat.
I stopped reading here.
No.
Okay.
To what end? Exactly what do you hope to accomplish?
Well, I would hope to see her again and have a relationship.
It’s hard to explain this without going into great detail. Yes, I’ve asked her out a dozen times but it’s never quite worked out. However, in each of those circumstances, I’d put my actions at fault and the reason why she decided to flake or just not respond. However, our friendship was still intact. The feelings deep down were still there at least for me. I’m quite certain she felt the same way at one point in time but I doubt thats the case anymore. But, I don’t really know. I don’t think there’s ever been anything that I’ve done that would constitute a “dealbreaker.” So for all I know she might still have lingering feelings. I could explain it but like I said it would take an awful amount of writing and more than I care to share.
Maybe we could just focus on the bigger concepts. What is wrong with my message? Some refer to as “clingy,” “needy” or “desperate”, but I contend that it’s just me being real. I can agree with something like Anaamika who suggests editing it and cutting it down. But, I disagree with the idea of being aloof and saying something along the lines of “Hey I was just thinking about you. Would you like to meet for coffee sometime?” and calling that confidence.
Of course, it’s all in context. I just feel that my message would be more appropriate given the context I perceive.
You’re clearly not good enough friends if you don’t even know what her current relationship status is, as I’ve said earlier. The fact that you’ve tried this unsuccessfully twelve times before isn’t a clear enough answer for you? You’re seriously going past the ‘insecure’ guy line and into the ‘creepy, stalker guy’ field. Let it go. She’s not that into you. Go find someone else to focus your attentions on.
What clear answer was I given? i ran into her, she said to call her, i did, we talked for a little, i would do/say something stupid and she would stop responding. Repeat numerous times.
Regardless, I don’t need to be reminded of that as I’ve said many times I’m not actually going to send the message.
Based on the scant and nonetheless cringe-inducing details you have provided, that certainly sounds like the best course of action for you both.
This is going to sound mean, but I swear I don’t intend it that way. After you’ve fucked up 12 times, you seriously shouldn’t trust your own instincts anymore. Again, that’s not an insult; I went through the same thing. It’s like that line from 40 Year Old Virgin that goes something like: “You’ve tried what’s felt right and it hasn’t worked out - it’s time to try something that feels wrong.”
Sorry, but at this point, I think you’re just looking for people to agree with you right now.
The consensus says that it’s probably not a good idea to pursue this further, and has given pretty thorough points.
She is not and should not be the be-all and end-all of your life. You can’t keep fudging around with the uncertainties; either ask her explicitly, or drop the subject altogether. At this point, nothing else is warranted.
You seem pretty clueless about dating. Even if you did date her a bit it seems unlikely that you’d have a long term relationship with her… those ebooks I recommended go into a lot of depth - much more than you could learn from a hand full of posts on this thread.
“Hey, you wanna go on a coffee date this Saturday?” Much simpler, much less desperate, and it uses the word date. I think that’s important to remove any ambiguity. You don’t want her to think you’re asking her out as a friends or because you just really like Starbucks, you know?
And it’s been said, but: whether you can admit or even see it in yourself, you are *extremely *insecure. Practice dating more people, and spend time developing a hobby that has absolutely nothing to do with chicks or getting laid.
haha omg, I just read the entire thread. Scratch the note entirely. And do practice dating other chicks. I hope you’re aware that when someone says, “Call me!” while walking away from you, it is not intended literally.
Can I ask you unironically: have you been diagnosed with Asperger’s?
Or? Be comfortable with being insecure, and date other insecure people.
I don’t think there’s anything inherently wrong or bad about being insecure. It’s a manageable condition. 
Wow are you serious Rachellelogram? No, I don’t have Aspergers. You know whats a sign of insecurity though? Insulting others to make yourself feel better.
Just for everyone else too. I’m not really that insecure. Yes, this is a sore spot but I’ve grown up a lot since then.
So just forget it. Thanks for the advice from everybody but I’m good now.
Has no one in your life pointed out to you that “Give me a call” is just a social politeness and doesn’t necessarily mean “I’m waiting with bated breath by the phone for you to call”?
“Call me” is girl speak for “I’m too polite to tell you to go away.” And just because I talk to you when you call, does not mean I’m interested, just that I have nothing better to do at that moment, or, once again, am too polite/socially conditioned to hang up.
So I shouldn’t expect an e-mail from the girl I met Friday night? 
That’s not an insult. It’s a legit question, in the same way that if someone is talking about how terrible they are and how nobody loves them and how the world would be better if they’re dead, you might ask if they’ve been diagnosed with clinical depression.
Turn that frown upside down there bucko! Sure you should! 
You just gotta wait her out. And if it never comes; I’m sure it’s just some sort of equipment malfunction with your computer and you should contact her and ask if she did indeed send it or not.
Ambi-We didn’t exchange, I put it in her phone. I’m hoping she’s merely observing the “3 Day Rule”