Tonight on Must-Gape TV (I’ll have to tape the Dick Van Dyke Show reunion):
So, we get to see FlufferNutter freak out, and some perv taking photos of little tarted-up girls? I’m guessing the “last-minute adjustments” to Shame’s act include him learning to sing.
Thanks for the reminder; my daughter’s high school choral concert is tonight. I’ll have to set the VCR.
Fluffer-Nutter freaks out? Now that’s Must-See TV. 
It’s like a train wreck… I just can’t avert my eyes.
How many more ways can the Wee Nutters say, “I don’t want to act, you goddam freak, get out of my face!”
And I get a distinct “June” and “Gypsy Rose Lee” vibe from Jordan and her kid sister . . .
I love Little Jordan in the Screaming Crazy Person Church scene! Everyone is crying and thrashing about and speaking in tongues, and she’s sitting there drawing with a “when will this be over?” look on her face.
Shame’s Mom: “Shame has never enterained this many people before.” Dear, Shame has never entertained anyone.
I think everyone in the country had that same thought simultaneously. And all of our hands flexed simultaneously when the casting guy had Shame by the throat.
I guess now we know why Teen Jordan isn’t listed at IMDB for the Heidi Fleiss movie.
You know what would be hilarious? If Grace Nutter got a job out of that audition and FlufferNutter didn’t even get called back.
I see major rebellion in the Nutter family. Like, Ma Kettle and the kids binding and gagging dad, shoving him in the crawlspace and moving back to Vermont. “Father? No, we never had a father. That gay guy? Oh, he was . . . our stylist.”
And who was the old lady grinning in the background while Gracie Nutter was having her well-deserved meltdown?
Lordy, that’s what I wanted to know! I suppose she’s a Nutter Grandma, but I don’t see how they could have smooshed one more person into that tiny, messy apartment. Ick!
I only wish the “producer” would have told Shame’s mother what he told us in the viewing audience: That SHE just doesn’t get it. . . and that Shame cannot act! (We’ve known that all along.)
I’m glad we didn’t focus so much on Emily Tye and Ma Tye tonight. Even though they were in minor roles, they still creeped me out. And I was once again apalled at the amount of money Granny Tye hands out for this pageant crap!
Teen Jordan and her stupid mother have every right to be upset about not being in the scene after having to drive and drive and drive (didja notice the driving time got longer each time it was mentioned?) but, for Pete’s sake, this is some stupid, two-bit production, not a Major Motion Picture! I don’t think you can expect the same kind of treatment in a schlock picture. Jordan, learn from this! It’s a Tough Business and you’ve got to be tough to make it! (Oh, and you should be able to act, too.)
Little Jordan and her Mom remain the only bright spots in this sad, sad series. I am eager to see the “Aftermath” show they were promoting for next Wednesday.
Finally got it together to catch an episode of this. I will second most everything y’all have said, and add this:
—Shame’s mom was a total harpy during his performance. Okay, so the audience couldn’t hear him…but did it help that they all heard you?
—Emily’s mom was blathering about how (paraphrased) “If you show up looking trashy, they’ll think you’re trashy”, while she was wearing a t-shirt and shorts that looked thrown on! Hint: Either dress up before you start driving, or stop at a rest area and change. Or was that your idea of looking respectable?
—And the way she went off on her own mom, while they were unpacking the car, was inexcusable.
—Although to be fair, I think 12 suitcases for a two-day pageant is the norm. Not sure why it is, but that’s what I’ve heard. You can’t squash a candy-box dress into a duffle bag, after all.
—FlufferNutter holding up a shirt and saying “This isn’t too wrinkled.” Jeez, man, get organized. Oh, you can’t? Well, what does that tell you?
—Little Jordan is a trouper. She’ll be a success at something, even if it’s not acting.
—Teen Jordan? Didn’t make much impression one way or the other. I don’t know, in context, how much weight her statement that her sister “wants it more” carries. (Or was it the mom who said that?)
I’d heard lots about the show, but this was my first time actually watching it (normally my roommate controls the TV but tonight she’s at home). Lordy lou, these people are crazy.
The only thing worse than Shane’s singing was his acting. I don’t think I need to say anything more.
WHERE do they FIND those kids for the Heidi Fleiss movie? I could act better than any of them, and an actor I ain’t. And Heidi? You’re not as much of a “presence” as you think you are.
Gotta agree with Rilchiam about Emily’s mom. I was like, “so…when are you going to stop looking trasy?”
Too bad I missed so many episodes of this show. It seemed really entertaining.
Forgot to add:
Shane K. absolutely blows my mind, and I do not mean that in a good way. I once heard the expression “couldn’t even get a job sweeping the stage”, and I never thought there would be anyone to whom it could be applied literally. Until now. He cannot sing. He cannot dance. He cannot act. He cannot even pretend to be paying attention to the casting director, or whatever that guy was. He simply has no business trying to do anything in the way of performing.
I looked up the previous threads about this show, and now I wish I’d seen last week’s episode. Was it him who had the “meltdown”, or his mom?
I watched bits and pieces (the Dateline farewell to Frasier was on.)
When Shane was up on that stage singing, my jaw dropped. How the hell did he ever get that gig? A cat can sing better when you step on its tail.
And during Shame’s “you shot my father!” audition? Where he couldn’t even pretend to know his lines, get into character or stop laughing?! If that casting director had any sense of decency, he would tell Shame and his Mom, “Get out of the business. Now.”
Did it strike anyone else that Wee Jordan was the only sane person (including her weeping Mom) in that church? Reminded me of the Simpsons episode where Mr. Burns bought the church and turned it into an advertising venture, and Lisa was the only one who jumped up and yelled, “you people are insane!” What the hell kind of church was that, anyway?
I loved it when Shane’s mom found out that he wasn’t performing in the stadium, but at a county fair near the stadium. Funny thing was, Shane didn’t seem to be that upset about it. Then again, the only time I’ve seen Shane be anything but perky (including when he was supposed to be acting serious during the audition) was when he threw up after finding out that his big performance was the same day as his school play. What I was trying to figure out in this whole situation was whether Shane’s “agent” just really sucks or whether Shane’s mom is just delusional enough to hear the agent’s directions to the county fair and think he’s performing at the stadium. It’s probably the latter.
Does anyone else think Mrs. Nutter looks like Woody Harrelson? Maybe that’s why he likes her.
Looked like a typical charasmatic/pentacostal type service to me. They tend to have a pretty demonstrative/emotional worship style.:
My thoughts:
I LOVE Clare Nutter. Finally somebody has the courage to stand up to FlufferNutter and tell him he’s basically making his entire family unhappy. She sat down and calmly described her feelings, and every single response by Fluffer was self-absorbed, irrrelevant tripe. The two shots that I loved during that scene was the one when MaFlutter was sitting between the two and looking, with a hint of a smile, at Clare as she told Fluffer, just as she’s told him for the last FRICKIN YEAR, that she wants to go back to Vermont. MaNutter looked so proud of her little girl, but I still am pissed that Ma doesn’t have the gumption to say something herself. My other favorite shot during that confrontation was the one of the older Nutter boy basically laughed at his Dad’s stupidity, delusions, and self-absorbation. I wish for the life of me I could recall the exact statement Fluffer made that made the kid laugh, but I loved that scene. Fluffer really needs to wake up.
Thank Og there wasn’t much of the Tyes. It almost pains me to watch them. The part I loved about this episode was how they edited the issue of the money. They show that the winner of the pagent gets $1,000 “scholarship”, and then immediately show shot after shot of Grandma Tye forking over large bills to pay for her “entry” into the pageant. Hysterical. I also loved the editing on the scene when they arrived at the pageant. You hear FauxJonBenet Mom voicing over about how the judging includes the entire family and every event that occurs when they arrive, so they all must behave well. Then they show FauxJonBenet Mom bitching at MoneyCowGrandma for dropping a box and then telling her to “Get out of the way. Just get out of the way.” Then later, FJBMom goes on to embarrass herself and her poor child by whining to the tournament director about another mom. Yeah, I’m sure that will help Emily a ton.
Once again, the voice of reason was LilJordan and her Mom. Love 'em
My favorite part with TeenAngstJordan and Mom was their unreasonably high expectations for the D - Grade movie shoot. Whining about the professionalism of a cheap-ass production that pays just $50 and a crappy hotel room was just silly. What were they expecting? I did feel bad when Mom was crying over the fact that Heidi Fleiss called TeenAngstJordan a smartass (That may not be the precise word she used, I don’t recall and I don’t tape the show). I wanted to leap into the television and give Mom a shake and scream: “She’s Heidi Effin’ Fleiss, you idiot! Why the hell would you give her any more credence than a bug?” Getting wound up over what a washed -up, pathetic, vapid, talentless Skeletor has to say is idiotic. But this episode gave me a bit of sympathy for Jordan and her mom. As an aside, I loved the comments from the manager about how her client was doing a nude scene. I was rolling on the floor while the manager elaborated about how it wasn’t really nude, but only topless, and how it wasn’t pornographic because it was art. Art!!! A topless teenager in a grade D slasher movie is Art! We may have found somebody more delusional than the Klinginsmiths.
Speaking of: I had spent last week amazed that Shane was going to be performing before, as his Mom said, “10,000 people at Raymond James Stadium.” I was relieved to find it was actually maybe 80 in a tent at a county fair in the parking lot of Raymond James Stadium. Ahh, cruel reality set in. But that did not deter ShameMom from making an ass of herself, and Shame from showing, once again, he has absolutely no talent. Although I did have one question. What the Hell was the audience doing giving Shame a standing ovation? Was this the “Deaf and Blind” county fair? Was it No Discernable Talent Day at the county fair? What was up with that. I was really taken aback by the preview for next week showing that Shame has a marquee in Vegas. What kind of topsy turvy world do I live in?
All in all, I still feel dirty watching the show, but, in my own sad, sick way, I really enjoyed this episode the most.
I think the reason Teen Jordan’s mom was crying was because Heidi Fleiss was right. Jordan is a smartass. JMO of course.
[Neely O’Hara] “Art films? Nudies! That’s all they are—nudies!” [/Neely O’Hara]
I grew up in a church like that (the same one that my parents still attend and my mother serves as an associate minister). As Captain Amazing said, it looked like a regular pentacostal church (the name of the church was another dead giveaway). Although to an outsider it may look “crazy”, it’s the way some people (especially black people) prefer to worship. It’s actually kinda fun when people break out into the happy church dance, as long as they don’t step on your toes. Personally, I like emotional services over staid, quiet, “proper” ones.
I thought it was cute how Little Jordan kinda comforted her mother when they found out she didn’t get the gig. I don’t think she would have been so stoic had the cameras not been there, but I think that just points to the kids’ self-awareness and intelligence. She obviously knows that being on this show will open some doors for her, and it’s best to put on a get front. Big Jordan could learn from her.
Big Jordan IS a smartass. “We should get her name…” Honey, you have to have some clout before you start taking names! And maybe her mother was PMSing, but Heidi’s comment was not worth all the tears, especially since Jordan didn’t let it bother her. I can think of worse things than being a smartass. Like dumbass.
I was very proud of Grace during her heartwrenching talk with her father, especially when she said, “I want YOU to listen to me”. She was weepy but she made her case articulately…something I couldn’t have done at that age with a roomful of cameras (and an old lady gawking in the background!) But I don’t think Daddy Dearest gets it. He’s still all about “I, My, and Me”.
Shane’s mother is a giant…dork. Was it necessary for her to mouth the words to Shane’s song, and then shout like a total moron at the sound crew? The tent wasn’t that big…where were all the tens of thousands of people she said was going to be there? And those poor girls. I thought she was going to hurt them when they were slow running back on stage.
I think she did…I heard somebody say “ow” when she was ordering them back on stage.
You guys are right, Shame’s mother IS a trainwreck, but what else would you expect from a timeshare salesperson? I mean hocking timeshares in the Land of the Mouse is just about the same thing as selling a no talent son. I noticed that Shame’s mom was walking with a limp. I was just wondering if you guys had noticed this limp before and was it a permanent thing or if it was just a temporary gimp thing caused by one of Shame’s back up dancers stepping on her toes?
Father Nutter sends my gaydar into hyper-drive with the “you are a big ole queen” siren screaming in my head from the moment he appears on screen to long after he’s left the screen.
Both the Tye’s and Klingenshit’s are from Florida. Aren’t we just glamorous down here! 
Same here. Watched the final half hour last night, the first time I’ve seen the show. And I’m sorry, while I understand the fascination on an intellectual, I’m not going to be able to watch it again: I thought it was televised child abuse. It made me want to puke; I barely made it through the half hour I did watch. I’m trying not to judge, but I’m honestly curious how you good folks can tolerate this freak show week after week.