Man, for an only child, I sure have a lot of siblings on this board.
For a woman in a monogamous marriage, I sure seem to have a lot of sister wives.
Yeh, my husband’s a motor mouth, too. About half the time he’s talking about something interesting, like office gossip or noteworthy things he saw at lunch or the latest stupid things the neighbors are up to. The other half of the time it’s long-winded stream-of-consciousness babble, stories I’ve heard dozens of times before, or technical descriptions of computer work he does at his job.
Alcohol exacerbates this. Am I right, sister-wives?
My father told me this long rambling story which he thought was funny. He was obviously testing it on me so he could tell others.
So I told him it wasn’t funny.
So he repeated it to me in case I had missed any of it which was funny. 
Poor Teela Brown, just not very lucky, I guess…
I’ll trade with some of you for one week a month.
My SO rarely speaks. Then he thinks he did speak up and wonders why I don’t know WTH he’s talking about.
I believe his thought is that if he “thinks” it loud enough, I will hear and know what he wants.
I want a chatty version every once in awhile. Any takers?
My husband doesn’t drink alcohol, thank Og, because I’m sure it WOULD increase his volume. If he’s not talking to me, or to someone on the phone, or to the cats, he’s talking back to the TV. If he’s talking to me, it’s only interesting to me about 10% of the time. Most of the time it’s about some TV show (if I wanted to know about that show, I’d watch it) or a long drawn out technical description of not only his computer work, but about the various car and truck and RV problems he’s having. He might describe a selection of various car parts, and ask my opinion about them. I DON’T KNOW. I DON’T CARE. As long as a car gets me from point A to point B without any drama, then the car is doing its job. Same with a computer. I don’t CARE what specs it has. As long as it will run the programs that I want it to run, it’s doing its job.
…and if he feels his audience is failing to follow along, does he whip out paper and pen and draw you a picture as well?
Usually he just sketches things in the air, but yes, on occasion he’ll draw pictures with pen and paper.
The other side of the coin, or…why I learned to love the dope.
“I’ve been talking to you and you haven’t heard a damn thing I’ve said…Oh, you’re on that damn message board again.”
Ha! Mine has a twist on this: he’ll wait until he’s in the middle of something (cooking, carrying laundry, etc) to ask me a complex or multi-part question and then, when I start answering, will get annoyed: “Can’t you see I’m in the middle of something?” Well then, why did you ask the question, silly!
i would not count yourself so lucky.
there is the “rule” that if it is said out loud in the house (or even on your property) then you are responsible for hearing it. you might have agreed to things (by her hearing no disagreement to the proposal) or be responsible to do things that you’ve never heard about.
digital voice memo recorders (about $20 USA for inexpensive ones) can be valuable. if a person is too busy to listen then hand the talker the memo recorder and have them record it; tell them you will listen to it later when you have time.
We get a lot of crows here. They are very noisy.
If one flies past and lets loose with a murderous “Caw” I turn to my partner and ask “What did you say?”
Do not use it more than once.
“You are old,” said the youth, “And your jaws are too weak
For anything tougher than suet;
Yet you finished the goose, with the bones and the beak—
Pray, how did you manage to do it?”
“In my youth,” said his father, “I took to the law,
And argued each case with my wife;
And the muscular strength which it gave to my jaw,
Has lasted the rest of my life.”
- Lewis Carrol, You Are Old, Father William (excerpt)
Is he middle-aged by any chance? I’ve reached the stage where I don’t always remember if I told my husband something, or I just thought about telling him.
Hah! That’s bold, my friend.
I’m having flashbacks to my first marriage. He had two modes: talking up a storm about anything and everything completely nonstop and silent. Being the impossible-to-please person I am, no matter which mode he was in I wanted the other. 
Moses and Aaron on a crutch.
I didn’t know about this.
I’m probably already screwed!
Is his name Ken. My God that asshole won’t shut the fuck up.
She: “Wow, it is very windy!”
I: “Do I need to go tie down your broom, Baby?”
I have used that on two Wives.
I HAD to mention that.
I thought there was a Rule that I was unaware off.
“No, I’ve never worked that way…but now that you mention it, sounds pretty good!”
dammit.