movies just full of them:
“I’m not even supposed to be here. I’m just “Crewman Number Six.” I’m expendable. I’m the guy in the episode who dies to prove how serious the situation is. I’ve gotta get outta here.”
“OH, That’s not RIGHT!”
"Red-thingy moving toward the green-thingy. I think we’re the green-thingy. "
"Uh, hi guys. They’re telling me that the, uh, engines, they can’t take it. The ship is falling apart. Just F.Y.I. "
D’these balloons blow up into funny shapes? — Well no . . . unless round is funny.
"I don’t run around going ‘I’m a gentile, look at my foreskin!’ "
:eek: :smack: 
*Who says I don’t care about my people? PULL! *–History of the World, Part I
So, you feel like you’ve been symbolically cast…in a bad light.–Ivanova, to Londo in Babylon 5.
That one always cracks me up!
“I sink you have a sexual block vith the schpelling of zat naughty name.” Peter Sellers in What’s New Pussycat
“Let’s play the Rape of Lucretia. You be Lucretia, and I’ll be rape.” Zero Mostel in The Producers
“I’m only paranoid because everyone’s against me!” Frank Burns
“You’re a hooker? I thought I was doing great with you!” Dudley Moore in Arthur
Ward, don’t you think you were a little hard on the Beaver last night.
The only movies I’ve watched in a long time are The Princess Bride and Monty Python and the Holy Grail- not that those have any shortage of quotable lines.
“A wooden duck!”
Oh B* one, kenobi!
In Fandango at the party when Philip asks “Where’s your car?”
Gardner:* You’re drinkin’ it!*
Monty Python’s Holy Grail and Life of Brian are treasure troves, as are Airplane! (“and don’t call me Shirley”).
TV-wise, for me, it’s The Simpsons followed by Seinfeld for most memorable one-line quotes.
Top of my head, best Simpsons quote is from Eddie the policeman in a conversation with his fellow cops about a Pulp Fiction like comparison between Krusty Burger and McDonald’s:
Wiggum: Do they have Krusty’s Partially Gelatinated, Non-Dairy Gum-Based Beverages?
Lou: Uh-huh. They call ‘em “shakes”.
Eddie: Huh. “Shakes”. You don’t know what you’re gettin’!
From the same episode, Skinner makes a lame excuse about why his kitchen appears to be on fire (behind a closed swinging door) while having his boss, Superintendent Chalmers, over for lunch at his house: “Aurora Borealis”.
“The Aurora Borealis? At this time of year… At this time of day… In this part of the country… Localized ENTIRELY WITHIN YOUR KITCHEN?”
“Yes.”
“…May I see it?”
“No.”
(As a terrific visual touch, the “camera angle” framing the Superintendent is slightly askew and zooms in slightly more with each new objection about the Aurora Borealis.)
Then as he quickly escorts his boss out the front door, his mother screams from upstairs, “Seymour, the house is on fire!” and he calmly replies, “No, mother, it’s just the Northern Lights.”
Junior Mint?
Continuing with the Simpsons…
My all-time favorite moment from that show was when Homer was abducted into Kang and Kodos’ spaceship. Homer says, “Well, I suppose you want to probe me. May as well get it over with…” He begins taking down his pants.
Kang and Kodos recoil in disgust, and one of them says, “Stop! We have reached the limit of what anal probing can teach us!”
“Hey, that’s Oh-neh-ders.”
“Guys, Chad fell down.”
And “That’s what she said” cracks me up every time. No, I’m not a 12 year-old boy.
“You’re makin’ a fool outta yourself, Clairee…This is football. All people care about are touchdowns and injuries. They don’t give a damn about that grape shit.”
And this entire sequence between Olympia Dukakis and Shirley MacClaine:
Clairee: Here!
[grabs Ouiser by the shoulder and positions her in front of M’Lynn]
Clairee: Hit this! Go ahead M’Lynn, slap her!
Ouiser Boudreaux: [taken aback and confused] Are you crazy?
Clairee: Hit her!
Ouiser Boudreaux: Are you high, Clairee?
Truvy: [in a frightened tone] Clairee, have you lost your mind?
Clairee: We’ll sell t-shirts sayin’ “I SLAPPED OUISER BOUDREAUX!” Hit her!
Annelle: [in a scared tone] Ms. Clairee, enough!
Clairee: Ouiser, this is your chance to do something for your fellow man! Knock her lights out, M’Lynn!
Ouiser Boudreaux: [snatches away] Let go o’ me!
Clairee: M’Lynn, you just missed the chance of a lifetime! Half o’ Chiquapin Parish’d give their eye teeth to take a whack at Ouiser!
I love Olympia.
“Hot and black, like my men”
“The pointy kitty ran away with the key!”
“I always pictured being proposed to while holding a bouquet of flowers, not my own ankles”
I totally almost wrote that one at the same time you were!
In Lethal Weapon 2, Danny Glover and Joe Pesci are creating a distraction at the South African consulate so Mel Gibson can break in. Pesci goes up to the counter and says his friend wants to emigrate to South Africa, and he’d like help talking the friend out of it. Before the guy at the counter can respond, Glover sits down with a huge grin on his face.
Counter guy (heavy accent): B-but… you’re black.
(pause, Glover looks innocently confused)
Pesci, turning toward Glover: He’s right, ya know… y’are.
The absolutely perfect deadpan Pesci uses has made that last line a staple catchphrase among my friends.
That reminds me…
Remember when Homer tried to be an inventor and he made that makeup gun?
Marge, deadpan, “Women won’t like being shot in the face.” I always thought that line concealed a subtle double entendre.
One of my favorite **Raising Arizona **quotes.
My nominee is from Battlestar Galactica:
“Bitch stole my ride.”