[sub]I apologize if this has been done before.[/sub]
Pud, dick, dong, wang, Johnson, dode, pecker, tally-whacker, willie, John Thomas, schwanz, shlong, shmeckel, prick, cock… etc.
What I want is slang for “penis” in other languages. Becuase, uh, you never know when they might come in handy (no pun intended 
). “Shmeckel,” “shlong” & “schwanz” all sound vaguely Yiddish. “Dong” & “wang” sound vaguely Chinese.
Any others?
“piel” is the only Afrikaans one that I can remember…
Grim
chin-chin in japanese
lao er in Mandarin
lu in Shanghaiese
[hijack] When Wayne Wang’s movie CHAN IS MISSING first came out, some wiseass climbed up in the middle of the night and changed the movie marquee to read “WAYNE CHAN’S WANG IS MISSING”
Actually, although I remember this happening at a theatre on the Upper West Side, it now sounds so unlikely (no cops around? Really?) that I wonder if someone just TOLD me this happened, as in “Wouldn’t it be witty if…?” [end hijack]
Ok here is a couple of swedish ones
Kuk, snopp, pitt, Petter-Niklas , byxormen (trouser snake), stake, snabel, slang.
I am sure Dryga Yes,The Gaspode or some other swedes can fill in a bunch more.
Ptak a vejce (bird and eggs) in Czech for penis and testicles. Sesame Street would have a hard time with that big yellow guy over here…
Damnit, Tomcat, you beat me to ptak!
“Tippi” is the generally accepted Icelandic word for “penis.”
[insert Tippi Hedren joke here]
Aside from that one, as seems to be the case with most languages there’s a whole bevy of different terms, most of which would be uncool to use as slang in English because they’re quite esoteric and, I imagine, fairly unpronouncable to most Americans. That said, when am I ever gonna get the legitimate chance to post these on a message board again? So without further ado, I present to you:
Fnoonf’s Incomplete And Unscientific Index of Practical Icelandic Penile Terms
Böllur (BUDD-lur) (schlong)
Skaufi (SKUH-ee-vih) (dick)
Göndull (GUND-uhdl)* (cock)
Lókur (LOW-cur) (prick)
Tilli (TILL-uh) (willie)
Jón Tómasson (YONE TOME-us-son) (John Thomas)
OK, kidding about that last one.
Well, hope that helped some. I can rest easy now, confident that I’ve done my part in the ongoing battle against ignorance, at least for today.
*This pronunciation is quite literally impossible to convey properly without the use of phonetic symbols and/or major oral surgery.
When someone told my Sudanese friend his zip was broken, it caused her great amusement, that being pretty crude back home in Khartoum. Whether that’s just in Sudan or other arabic speaking countries, I don’t know.
Lun in Canonese.
In Ireland I’ve heard micky, langer, and flute.
German:
Brazilian:
Dutch:
Finnish:
Spain: “Pinto” means “small penis” in Spanish slang. This is why the car of the same name did not sell well there.
Phillippines (or Korea, I forget which): Remember the characters on the sitcom “Happy Days?” Remember Joanie? Remember Chachi? Remember a short-lived TV show called “Joanie Loves Chachi?”
I have heard that the premiere of “Joanie Loves Chachi” was the highest-rated television show ever in the Phillippines (or Korea, I forget which).
It seems that “chachi” is local dialect for “penis”, naturally…
In Hebrew, the most common slang term for dick is Zayyin, pronounced just like Americans pronounce “Zion.” That made for some great puns in my Zionist youth movement, let me tell you!
[sub]“I’m an up-and-coming Zionist!”
“Together, we can erect the Zion of our dreams.”[/sub]
In american sign language, ‘penis’ is a variation of ‘pee’…& it starts @ your nose. I never figured out why but its funny to see.
The Royals in the UK seem to speak a differant language to the rest of us yokels.
According to Prince Charles it is “Mr Wobbly”
Uh, aren’t those all names in Lord Of The Rings?
Geez…Tolkien was kinkier than I thought.
my friend taught me how to say “suck my dick” in russian…
I have no idea how to spell it , but it sounds like this…
pa-sa su-y moi whee
One in Hindi is “dhanda”, literally stick.
I used to work with some Bangladeshis (Bangalese?) and their favorite word was “boga”.