Smartalxs's antisex views

So I’m pitting Smartalx, and his wish that we all stop acting like sex fiends.

In this thread http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=539220 and this thread http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=537377 Smartalx makes it known that he doesn’t approve of our society’s casual attitude toward sex. Smartalx doesn’t think we should be having premarital or promiscuous sex.

Basically, this guy pisses me off, as would pretty much anyone who claimed they were actively working towards stopping me from having sex. I assume he has these opinions because of his religious beliefs, but instead of just coming out and saying it, he tries to come up with other, supposedly logical reasons we shouldn’t have sex.

He spews a lot of irrational nonsense, but my personal favorite is this one from post 79 of this thread http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=539220 in which he writes

Aside from the obvious problem with that statement, sex is not dancing, Smartalx claims he has never had sex (and I don’t doubt it). So how the hell can he know what you can find out about someone by having sex with them?

I really hope that Smartalx reads this thread, because I would like to know more about oxytocin bonding, or why having sex with someone results in me giving that person part of my soul. I had no idea i had been leaving Horcruxes all over my college campus. So Smartalx, what’s the real reason you don’t want us having sex? Jealousy? Religion? Out with it!

Finally, I’d like to say that while I disagree with what Smartalx has to say, i commend the amount of effort he put into defending (albeit poorly defended) his opinion. He’s kept an eight page debate going purely by himself. That kind of devotion is impressive, in a creepy scary sort of way.

I think his hips would look quite fetching if bound by a snug red sash, myself.

Hips don’t lie.

Dude needs to get laid.

So it’s SmartAlx who’s been keeping us all from getting laid? Damn. About time somebody pitted him, then.

I’m sick of his underlying assumption that married women are baby-factories.

While I pitty the poor person who takes his virginity and has to put up with all his angst I suspect the first time he gets laid will be an epiphany for him and he’ll come back to retract all his bullshit.

Till then he obviously has no clue what he is talking about and can be safely ignored.

ETA: I danced with my GF before having sex with her and no, dancing did not come close to telling me all I needed to know about her despite being a helluva lot of fun itself.

They aren’t? Why didn’t I get the memo!

/me runs (fast)

:wink:

And if you have sex early on, you’re a sex fiend with no self control. Especially women.

But remember, he doesn’t mean that in a judgemental way! No, never!

For someone who doesn’t seem to believe casual sex is OK, he’s awfully obsessed with it.

I’m a sex fiend with no self control.
Especially since I’m a woman.

Yay me!

Yay you, indeed! :smiley:

What I want to know is why people on this board are so concerned about what crazy people think.

We care when they come here and inflict their crazy opinions on us.

Why?
Also, if you really cared you would just ignore them and their threads would disappear and they would go away. Crazy people aren’t going to stop being crazy just because someone denounces them.

A lady I work with teaches a teen Sunday school class and teaches this stuff at her Catholic Church. I wonder who is putting this ‘science’ out.

I wasn’t aware that my soul looked like semen.

What I’m wondering is, does it go both ways? If you lose a tiny fraction of your soul to anyone you sleep with, doesn’t that mean they give you a tiny fraction of their soul at the same time? Doesn’t sound so bad, when you think of it that way.

Does that mean all the guys I’ve ever slept with are Horcruxes*, since I’ve put a little piece of my soul in every one?

I guess I’m pretty much immortal, then.
*Harry Potter reference, for those of you who’ve not read them.

See, now I thought that quoted bit in the OP was the first clever thing he said. I read it as ‘You can tell everything about how a person has sex by dancing with them. Except how they have sex.’

Silly me. This is the guy who thinks women who get abortions should be sent to jail to think about what they’ve done. It took 6 pages for him to concede that men couldn’t just be an afterthought in the science of procreation. I said it before and I’ll say it again – it sounds like he either got a girl pregnant (or thought he did) or found out that the girl he was crushing on wasn’t a virgin, and now he’s freaking out and mad at the world, or at least the female half.

So…how YOU doin’?