last Sunday evening at the bar in the Swisshotel in London, I found myself propostioned by a women. Nothing to be upset about, except that she was wearing a “must not touch marker” colloquially known as a “wedding ring”. Is there a new fashion of wearing a plain gold band on the ring finger of your left hand. What the hell are you supposed to do in a situation like this, when a very atractive, very married woman is busy hitting on you? My friend idea was “take the bait”, which I suspect was a bit unrealistic.
And why would you wear a wedding ring when going out “hunting”.
When I tended bar this happened to me all the time. This is not ment as an indication of my attractivness. I just happened to be there. Never took anyone up on it - hell it was a local bar, I knew their husbands fer cryin’ out loud.
Untill then I always thought it was us guys that usually did all the cheating - a real eye opener that was.
Plenty of women wear random rings on their left ring fingers, but a plain gold band? Not so much. If she didn’t take it off, she probably just wanted you to know the deal – NSA sex, no relationship. Or she thought you might have a cuckolding fantasy.
Hell no about the cuckolding thing. But comeone, a bar on a sunday in an impersonal hotel catering to businesspeople on travelis is hardly a place to look for a life partner; most propositions are for NSA sex (one of the reasons I was there infact:D) but would any of you ladies do such a thing?
Women are just as stupid as men, period. If you weren’t interested in NSA sex, you should just say so – “look, I don’t stick my dick in the married” and be done with it. If you were interested, go for it. Me, I find that those who “hunt” while still wearing their rings are a little better than the ones who lie to everyone by taking the ring off, but that’s just my HO.
I’ve slept with a few married women. My reasoning was always that they were the ones doing the cheating, not me. Not sure if that holds water or not but it sure seemed like the correct moral position to have at the time.
And w/r/t cheating, EVERY women I have asked has admitted to doing it, wheres about half of the men I’ve asked haven’t.
I did have a perhaps irrational fear that I might find myself named as a co reposndent in a divorce petition, who knows if the whole thing is a setup. I also don’t find it particularly moral. I mean a wedding rings means “hey hands off”. But the question remains, why would anyone wear a wedding ring and go hunting, NSA sex wanted or not. Won;t that turn people away?
She’s not concerned with whether or not it’s right or wrong for her to have sex with someone she picks up in a bar, and she’s being very plain about the fact that she’s not going to hide her married status, which by extension means she’s looking for someone else to whom that also doesn’t matter.
Back in my younger days, I used to get a reasonable amount of action when I was single. But if I had taken the ladies up on the offers I got when I was married and wearing a ring, the skin on my johnson would have been charred from friction.
What is so special about a married guy to the single wimminz?
A lot of married men seem comfortable treating attractive women like human beings because they’re not sizing them up as potential lovers or girlfriends. It’s a nice change for some of them.
Plus there’s that whole element of curiosity, that idea, ‘Well if some other woman thought he was good enough to marry, he must have something…’
Childish fantasies about being ‘the other woman.’
Women who want a lover without all the responsibility or relationship stuff.
Or, in many cases, they don’t know the guy is married (or think he’s mid-divorce) until they’ve fallen for him.
Is it at all possible that she wasn’t out “hunting” but found you personally attractive? I know quite a few women who wear gold bands so they don’t get hit on (as much). Maybe she does that, and just forgot she had it on when she unexpectedly found herself attracted to you. I also know one divorced woman who still wears her ring, for reasons I don’t quite understand.
^
Yes. Yes she is. Had kids. I spoke to her for a good hour, well she was lovely company. Did not ask about the state of her marriage, because i) it would be rude and ii) I ain’t doing it with married women,
I have a friend who sometimes wears her late grandmothers ring to avoid being hit on, but I have been surprised that women seem to be less “restrained” by wedding rings then men.
We moved to the little town my family lives in in 1972, as Dad got a job here as Personnel Manager in a factory. Most of the workers were women, both in AA-type positions and in Production (they passed the dexterity test better than the men); many were entering the factory at or near the minimum legal working age of 14 (it’s higher now). Dad was horrified to discover that quite a few of the single women would specifically chase after any “taken” man: a guy could be wide enough to need double doors, dumber than a retarded virus and a complete fart in the charm department, but if he managed to get a girlfriend the “hunters” would go for him like rockets. Why? To prove that they could, of course: they had no interest in the guy, just in getting their trophy by making him break up with his gf or have a huge public row with the wife (there was no divorce back then, and for infidelity most women wouldn’t leave the house: they’d either kick him out or make his life impossible).
Eh, the promises that come with a wedding ring are between the husband and wife - they don’t spill over into the general population. I don’t know too many guys that’ve backed off or shut down the minute they spotted a wedding ring on a gal’s hand down at the bar. If anything, they’ll tread with caution, but many many married gals in that scenario simply take a little joy in a man making a tasteful pass at them - even if they’d never go through with it, they’ve got a spring in their step the rest of the day.
I’m with a crowd that appreciates the honestly with which this women conducted her deception. It’s so rare and forward to have all those cards on the table, and if anything I’d think more of her for it. Here’s a women who chooses only to lie to one man - call it the lesser evil, but there’s an ironic integrity there that I dig.
From a younger man’s perspective: I pay pretty much no attention to a ring on the “wedding ring finger” anymore.
A very high percentage of girls I know, have at one time or another, worn a ring on the left ring finger as their way of attempting not to be hit on, single or not.
I have flirted with such girls, gotten phone numbers of, dated and been in serious relationships with girls that all had practiced this, practice.
I pay zero attention to a ring on that finger.
Then again, I am young and so are the girls I’m chatting up, so the possibility of them actually being married is a lot smaller. We’ll see if I start paying attention to that ring as I get older.