I grew up in a culture of stand up comedians giving the impression that all men want nothing but sex and all women fake all of their orgasms (unless they’re having an affair). Meg Ryan’s famous fake orgasm is always present as proof that women can fake orgasms.
I’m just wondering one thing: can women fake it down there? Can they fake that 30-second, or so, long squeezing that feels like (so I hear…) someone is gripping your wang like in their fist?
Just curious.
1.) Not everybody does this. every woman’s orgasm is unique.
2.) A lot of women can consciously do this. Look up “kegeling exercises”
I would opine that it would take a Kegel Champeen of Olympic talents. For many women, the physical manifestation of orgasmic cycle is a series of rapid wave-like spasms moving through the vaginal canal.
Opposed to, say, the single end-to-end clenching of the vaginal ( and other ) muscles usually associated with a Kegel contraction.
In addition to being able to feel the direction of the wave-like spasm, the frequency of the waves within the space of a few seconds might well be impossible to fake using Kegel muscle contractions. I dunno. I say it’d be incredibly difficult to truly fake them.
Then again, I think lots of men have no clue at all what is happening inside of their lovers when they orgasm because it might only happen when they are either using oral or oral/digital stimulation and since their penii are not inside their partners, they would have to have inserted a finger or two ( more more 
) in order to accurately understand the physical manifestations of the orgasmic cycle.
Men might well take the external manifestations of an orgasm and assume ( wrongly ) that that’s all there is to it from a woman’s body point of view. The sudden rigid engorgement of the nipples, the rippling of abdominal muscles, sometimes the unconscious clenching of extremeties such as fingers or toes, a flush of redness along the breasts, the drenched labia, and so on.
Guys, we gotta get more of a clue. It is like a silent symphony, pleasing a partner who is a woman. Well, silent till she starts screaming in pleasure. Which is also a nice thing. 
Having said all of that, in addressing # 2 of Cal Meacham’s post, I agree with #1. All women are different. Thank god.
Cartooniverse
Totally off-topic, but I gotta ask. What would a “culture of stand up comedians” be like?
You know, put 'em in a petri dish with some cliches and canned applause for nourishment. 
Meg Ryan’s fake orgasm looked like a fake orgasm to me. Also, the plural of “penis” is either “penes” if you want to run with Latin plurals, or “penises” if you don’t; “penii” doesn’t fly either way (it’s third declension). Other than that, I got nothin’.
How refreshingly honest of you to admit that, though.
bolding mine
My apologies. I figured that the plural of Magus is Magii, so the plural of Penis is Penii.
I sit corrected.
hawksgirl, you rock.
Yeah, that too…but sometimes (I hear) that’s not so easy to feel when you’re movin’ and shakin’.
Bolding mine.
Aw dude. My sympathies.
Magi, not magii. In general, words that end in -us in the singular are masculine and end in -i in the plural, words that end in -um in the singular are neuter and end in -a in the plural, and words that end in -a are feminine and end in -ae in the plural. Words that end in -is, however, despite sounding very similar to -us in English pronounciation, are rather more complicated. They can be masculine, feminine, or neuter. They will generally end in -es in the plural, but other parts of the word might change in the process. For instance, the Latin plural of “clitoris” is not “clitores”, in analogy with “penis/penes”, but “clitorides”.
But back to the OP: I wouldn’t be surprised if some women could consciously cause that reaction. However, I do wonder whether a woman could cause that reaction without actually inducing a “real” orgasm in the process. The interaction between mind and body is not as simple as it’s often made out to be, and it’s not a one-way process.
Well, that’s a rough one. ( Not the grammar thing. Thank you for setting me straight. ). I meant, the business of your second 'graph. If a woman consciously can cause that physical reaction, so that she can"fake" an orgasm- but in doing so can only cause that reaction by having a real orgasm, then we get into very deep and murky waters.
That would mean that in her mind, she’s faking as far as her lover goes but she is in fact experiencing a real climax.
Brutal.
Pet peeve of mine. There are very few common words in Latin that end up with two Is on the end in the plural. Most of the Latin nouns borrowed into English that end in -us pluralize with -i, so “magus/magi”, “fungus/fungi”, “cactus/cacti”. The only way you end up with two Is is when the root ends in an I, as with “radius/radii”. Of course, many other words ending in -us don’t pluralize that way: “genus/genera”, “apparatus/apparatus”, or “virus” which has no attested plural whatsoever (but if it did, it certainly would not be “viri”, much less “virii”). And words ending in -is don’t end in -us, they end in -is. So don’t treat them like words ending in -us.
Stop with the goddamn two I thing. It’s annoying. There is no -ii ending in Latin - that combination only comes about when a noun’s root ends in i: “radi-” is the root of “radius”, so the singular and plural are “radi-us” and “radi-i” respectively. I’m not sure why, but a lot of people seem to have gotten this idea into their heads that -ii is some sort of frequent ending on Latin nouns. It’s not. Stop using it. Stop trying to make up your own innovative ways to pluralize things, or my head will explode.
You make a lot of good pointii.
Only on the Straight Dope can a discussion of faking female orgasms turn into one on Latin case endings! I’m impressed.
Has any actual female-type participant in this thread so far attempted to answer this question from personal experience? 'Cuz, speaking for myself, I would say that I could probably more or less fake the contractions, but it would take so much concentration that I probably couldn’t manage to fake any of the other “symptoms” at the same time. “Honey, why did you suddenly go silent and lie there nearly motionless with a thoughtful expression? Does that mean it was good for you?”
Speaking for myself again, you bet. That would definitely be the long, difficult, slow way around to attaining an actual orgasm. It’d be a lot more effective to give up on the faking/“inducing” attempts and just concentrate on the actual sensations.
I agree. I can squeeze when I want to, but there’s a certain amount of focus involved. Maybe I need practice? And when it’s real, it’s stronger and the contractions are so close together that there’s no way I could fake it, even if I wanted to. Happily, I have no need to fake anything.
Yep. Sure can.
I envy EJ.
I think you meant “pointuses”
Thirty five years of Kegel exercises performed during boring workdays means a lot more control over the girl bits than most people would credit. Yeah, I can make a pretty good approximation of orgasm contractions without working at it too hard, but actually I’m much more fun when I’m paying attention and causing some REALLY interesting ripples tailored to the rhythms of the guy I’m with. Orgasm contractions have their own timetable that can’t be varied and in my case at least can actually throw my guy off his rhythm because they’re so strong he can’t fight 'em to impose his own rhythm on mine, and sometimes if I’m really motivated I can squeeze him right out in spite of counterpressure. If I’m on top I’m perfectly capable of causing major multiple orgasms in him (yeah, I’m lucky too, he’s built like that!) without actually moving up and down at all–it’s all internal.
Women who don’t do Kegels are stupid–not only do they result in guys following you around with moony looks on their faces but the more control a woman has over her internal muscles the more orgasmic she gets as well. Not to mention the stress incontinence issue…