So DO IT ALREADY, jerkweed!

Sweet thragglin’ Zoroaster, dude. At this point the entire neighborhood knows more about you and your wife than any sane person wants to contemplate. Your latest bit about killing yourself if she doesn’t let you in? That’s some funny stuff, man. I only wish you hadn’t lied about it… I might be able to go back to sleep, then.

(Apparently the wife feels the same, because she told him to “GO AHEAD!”. At full volume, of course. Yeesh.)

Yeah, yeah, the cops have been called – desk dude said I was the fourth person to call about this nutjob so far – but they’re busy and it’ll be an hour or so before they get here. Sigh.

So YAY! I get to surf the Dope at … uh… almost 2 am on a Sunday night. And I gotta work tomorrow.

Maybe if I go out there and offer him ten bucks to Go AWAY…?

sob

Be a good neighbor. He’s obviously having trouble killing himself–so go give him a hand.

Isn’t it a pity that assisted suicide is a crime? Sometimes you sure feel like giving them a hand…

I don’t wake up before my hour easily, if someone got me up at 2am I’d be pretty murderous.

Ah, Spokane. All of the substance abuse (alcohol/meth) and none of the delights of the western side of the Cascades.

(I’m just needling you a bit. Spokane is actually a nice town.)