So, I asked Charity out

Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share
1

Last Thursday after work.

What’s that? You want details.

Sigh

Fine.

I have to preface this by saying that every single time in my life that I even semi-planned something like this, ie; asking a girl/woman out/what I’d say, the results were quite often less then spectacular, unless you consider spectacular in the plans gone horribly wrong sort of way.

Anyway, we walked out to her car and we were chatting, and I said, “Can I tell you something?”

Charity: “Yeah.?”

Ben: “I like you. (Mid-length pause) You are one of the reasons I look forward to coming to work every day. And I was wondering if you’d like to have a drink sometime or get together and do something.?”

Charity: (Semi-paraphrased) “Well, my ex and I are trying to be friends and right now I’m not really in a place where I feel like I want to get involved and have to deal with the pain and stuff. (Short pause.) But yeah, we could get a drink sometime.”

Sigh

Happy now?!?

Driving home, I thought about what had happened and while it perhaps wasn’t the outcome that I wanted, it wasn’t the worst possible outcome either. (That would have been her running screaming in terror after bitch-slapping me.)

And it didn’t feel quite like the end of the world.

Almost.

But not quite.

Of course, when I got back to work yesterday, I wasn’t really in a mood to hang out with her, so I pretty much kept to myself all day, but today we talked and stuff.

Plus I saw my counselor again, which is good, I guess.

And hopefully I’ll have pictures of The World’s Most Adorable Bunny up soon for all to see and oh and ahh over.

2

Finally we get an update! (I think it’s safe to say that both White Lightning & I have been cheering you on).

Kudos to you for following through & asking her. No, it wasn’t quite the reaction you had hoped for but it wasn’t terrible either. Her situation is understandable, just as you too have had a difficult year. Be kind - everyone has their battles to fight.

I think it’s a good start and even if it didn’t pan out, you’re still doing great. You’ve come a long way, things seem to be improving at work, you’re seeing a counselor, etc.

Best Wishes to you.

Beth

3

Here’s one to start out with:D

[sub]Yeah, I know, different bunny, but still:)[/sub]

4

Dude, that’s a great start!

She said YES.

And she gave you an excuse and then said yes. This means, if the two of you ever do get together for drinks or whatever, she is actually into you. Because she’s letting you buy her a drink despite the situation with the ex.

Way to go, man. That takes guts. Big step. Keep takin 'em.

5

Congrats on asking WSLer - and remember - nothing ever goes perfectly. You got a yes - work that yes in a patient way - actually get together, enjoy the time for what it is, have a good conversation. And see where it goes.

After all of the agony associated with asking, it feels like there should be a parting of clouds, a beam of light, a climactic thunderclap to announce the event and a dramatic counterpoint in the form of the other person’s tension-fulled, emotionally released response. When we don’t get that, it seems weird, but they are living their lives, too, and it sounds like she has her stuff to deal with.

It’s a good start - heck, it’s a start, period, and that counts.