Hi, I need some advice
I have a major crush on my best friend. She is really nice, has a great personallity and is cute to boot. I have had this crush for about 2 years now. She sorta knows I have a little crush on her but not the extent of it. We were talking once and discussing if we were on a desert Isle and could only be with one person, who woud it be? I said her, and she thought I was kidding, but I was not. Another problem is that I am also good friends with her twin brother. That would sure be award to say the least, but I just really don’t know what to do. I wish to retain the friendship, but I don’t want to take any chance is wrecking our friendship or my friendship with her brother.
Ben
I’m not an expert here, and one person’s experience isn’t necessarily the same as anyone else’s. That being said, I met my husband about five years ago. We ended up becoming good friends, and I developed a huge crush on him. I finally got up the courage to tell him how I felt, and he admitted that he felt the same way toward me. Obviously it ended up being the best thing I ever did. Had I not said anything, or if he had rejected me, I think we would have ended the friendship. I don’t believe that he would have ended it, but I would have. It’s not that I would have been too embarrassed or anything, but my feelings were so strong for him that I couldn’t stand being around him as “just a friend” anymore.
She already knows you have a crush, right? Maybe you could explain your feelings and ask if she feels that you could be more than friends. But decide beforehand what you would do if she says no. Being friends with her brother puts another wrench into the works, so you need to consider that as well. I wish I had a definite answer that I could give you. Good luck with whatever you decide to do.
This is only an addition to the above. If her brother is your friend then he should be happy that you have feelings for his sister and if she doesn’t feel the same toward you then he shouldn’t be upset. It would probably be you that would feel out of place and so deal with it and keep both as friends if it doesn’t work out.
And depending on the age this might be the opposite of the case. I’ve wanted to beat guys up who had feelings for my sister . . . but mostly those guys were kinda graphic and I didn’t really want to hear about it.
Good luck, renigademaster.
I have been in this situation. Let me start by saying you are in a world of pain. It’s too late to avoid. Tell her, and run the risk of getting squashed. Don’t tell her, and wonder for evermore if it could have been.
I hate giving love advice, but since I have been there, let me put it this way: The pain of experience is more bearable than the pain of ‘what if’.
I think you should tell her how you feel. I think it would be unfair not to. Just do not be surprised if she says no. Be prepared for it. Figure out what you’re going to do in advance.
If she does say no, she will probably immediately lay the “I just want to be friends” line on you. Remember that you have no obligation to be her friend just because she’d like things to be that way.
If you want my honest estimation, if you’ve been friends for 2 years and she hasn’t made a move or hinted or anything, then she isn’t really interested. I’m sorry to say that, I don’t like saying it. And remember that I’m very, very far away from the situation and cannot accurately judge things. But that’s what my instincts tell me.
-Ben
Yikes…been there done that. I feel your pain…I really do. In my case I got both the good and bad of the deal (several months of a fantastic thing then crash and burn and lost a 12 year friendship). For all of that I honestly couldn’t tell you if I’d stop it from happening if I could go back in time and change things.
Waverly’s advice seems dead on. Run the risk of alienating her forever or always wonder what might have been.
In the end follow your heart. Cheap talk, I know, but it’s the best you’re likely to get. Being true to yourself is hardly ever a bad move (unless you’re a psycho 
).
Best of luck!
From my own experience: there’s this girl I knew for about two years, we had a great friendship. I felt a bit more for her, and one day drove down to Boston (where she was going to school) and sang her this song I wrote about how I felt about her.
Well, she didn’t feel the same for me, and I was shattered for a little while, but we have maintained the friendship, and although it is still a little awkward at least for me (this happened just this past spring), I’m glad I did it. I felt good about being honest about how I felt, and didn’t have to live in a constant state of expectations and could get on with my life. Do it, I say, tell her how you feel…
I think in the long run it can only be a positive experience, unless she treats you like a jerk, in which case maybe it’s better to know now that she would do that to you. If she’s classy, even if she doesn’t feel that way about you she will not let you walk away feeling like an idiot for sharing.
“tell her about it, the girl don’t want to wait too long”
I just thought I would let you know, her brother knows and thinks that is cool, but the thing is, I don’t want to loose 2 relationships. DANGITALL!!!
I agree with everyone. Tell her how you feel. Just be sure to let us know what happens.